For the Love of the Tree

How do you feel about Lossy's Treeness?

  • I am in full acceptance of its reality, and strongly encourage Lossy herself to become the same.

    Votes: 16 61.5%

  • What Treeness? It does not exist! What would put such a silly idea into your heads?

    Votes: 3 11.5%

  • I don't care. If Lossy doesn't want to be a tree, then you should just leave her alone.

    Votes: 3 11.5%

  • SQUIRREL!!!!!!!

    Votes: 11 42.3%
  • Total voters
    26
The Tree needs to be hugged back onto the Lawn. She keeps trying to go on ocean cruises. Of course they all reject her because of her height (wouldn't fit into the cabins) but she refuses to give up. Sometimes persistence is a vice....
 
She could try a bike ride. Bike rides are fun and very relaxing. All we have to do is find a really big bike. And a big helmet. And maybe a bell to put on the handle bars.
 
I'm afraid her roots would drag. Although the sight of a Tree riding a bicycle would be amusing, to say the least....
 
*Puts Stetson on Lossy-Tree*

Maybe Stetson will keep her company. He's the only sentient hat that I know of and she's the only sentient tree. Maybe they'll be happy.
 
*snaps photo* Very nice. Although the Tree is giving him bad looks and muttering something about a "sorry excuse for a birds' nest."
 
In honor of the Tree's graduation from Spruce University: a poem from A. E. Housman, nicely mangled.

from A Duffshire Lass
II. "Piniest of Trees."

Piniest of trees, the young fir now
Is hung with cones along the bough
And stands the rocky Cliff beside,
Her expression filled with pride.

Now of her threescore squirrels and ten,
Twenty boldly murder men;
But take from seventy squirrels a score,
That leaves a deadly fifty more.

And since to bring me to the tomb,
Fifty squirrels could be my doom,
Above the great Cliff I will go,
To give the squirrels a final blow.
 
(Eventually the squirrels will realize their pelting is in vain because they will simply have to re-gather the acorns they are wantonly tossing about, so while we await their discovery of that conclusion, here is a song dedicated to our dear L-T.)
To be sung to the tune of "O Christmas Tree":

O Lossy Tree, O Lossy Tree
Your leaves are graduating
O Lossy Tree, O Lossy Tree
We're all so proud we're fainting!
How deftly you have run your race
and finished full of faith and grace
O Lossy Tree, O Lossy Tree
What's next for you? ________?
(we're waiting...)
 
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