The Dancing Lawn - Official Forums of Narnia Fans
Register FAQ Members List Calendar Mark Forums Read

Go Back   The Dancing Lawn - Official Forums of Narnia Fans > The Lantern Waste > The Lamp-post

Notices

The Lamp-post It returns, the general topic forum, combining the general discussion threads from Tumnus, International and Wood between the worlds.

Reply
 
Thread Tools
  #6441  
Old 10-09-2017, 09:59 PM
Aravis Kenobi's Avatar
Aravis Kenobi Aravis Kenobi is offline
Friend of Narnia
 
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Writing. Working. Reading.
Posts: 16,536
Aravis Kenobi is just really niceAravis Kenobi is just really niceAravis Kenobi is just really niceAravis Kenobi is just really nice
Default

Miss Congeniality.
__________________
Banner made by Gondorgirl, by request. Please ask before taking. Avatar edited by moi.
Click here to read my Star Wars fan fiction.
"A great leap forward often requires taking two steps back. "
Reply With Quote
  #6442  
Old 10-13-2017, 11:03 PM
Glenburne's Avatar
Glenburne Glenburne is offline
Scourge of Squirreldom
 
Join Date: Dec 2008
Location: the White Horse Down
Posts: 2,810
Glenburne is a name known to allGlenburne is a name known to allGlenburne is a name known to allGlenburne is a name known to allGlenburne is a name known to allGlenburne is a name known to all
Default

Battle for Sevastopol. A piece of history I hadn't known about.
__________________
My literature blog, FirstFire

He marked the wood and the cloven ways
With an old captain's eyes,
And he thought how many a time had he
Sought to see Doom he could not see;
How ruin had come and victory,
And both were a surprise.
Reply With Quote
  #6443  
Old 10-15-2017, 05:52 PM
Copperfox's Avatar
Copperfox Copperfox is offline
Friend of Narnia
 
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: Colorado
Posts: 18,869
Copperfox is a name known to allCopperfox is a name known to allCopperfox is a name known to allCopperfox is a name known to allCopperfox is a name known to allCopperfox is a name known to all
Default

Lev (NOT "Leo") Tolstoy was at Sevastopol when the British and French besieged it. His written account of the siege, though published decades before the advent of motion pictures, has a remarkably _cinematic_ feel to it.

But moving on to what _I've_ seen:

It has often dismayed me that Christian-directed Christian-audience films are _very_ often trash in the artistic sense. Good intentions, even _sometimes_ a good message, but no skill in the execution. Lately, however, a secular DVD which I bought and watched giveth me great reassurance.... because it showeth me that even the most amateurish Christian moviemaker could not _possibly_ produce a movie as _dumb_ as the Lionsgate release "Tales of an Ancient Empire."

Thirty-six years ago, director Albert Pyun released the fantasy-action picture "The Sword and the Sorceror," starring the otherwise-TV actor Lee Horsley. Mister Horsley was nostalgically given a walk-on role by Mister Pyun for the 2008 "Ancient Empire" movie, and probably was privately glad that he _wasn't_ given a larger part. Kevin Sorbo, nominally the first-billed cast member of the new film, got barely ten minutes on screen, and had almost no action to do in those minutes. "Ancient Empire" featured a legion of vampires, but the former Hercules only managed to slay one vampire in the whole story. Still, Mister Sorbo doubtless was grateful for any star-billed employment, since he had finished the run of "Andromeda" and had not yet obtained his gig in the better-made "Mythica." And the ten-minute limit makes him virtually blameless for the shoddiness of this production.

My mind simply is boggled by just _how_ bad "Tales of an Ancient Empire" is. Some artwork that is prominently featured suggests to me that the script may have been derived from a graphic novel or series thereof. Any such comicbook work may have been done coherently; the movie, however, is nothing but a rambling patchwork mess of scenes which make hardly any sense. This lack of comprehensibility was partly due to staggering, wavering, blurry camera work-- which was especially evident when Michael Pare (who was absent from the middle of the movie, yet who carried more of the overall story than Mister Sorbo did) was supposed to be doing a death scene, but it was impossible to tell _how_ he came to be mortally wounded.

Moreover, there are gaps in both action and exposition, so bad that it seems
as if they changed directors three or four times as they went. I've mentioned that Kevin Sorbo slew a vampire in "Ancient Empire;" actually, he wasn't even _seen_ doing this, there was only a narrator _saying_ that his character did it-- by a lucky hit. Now, I enjoy watching most things Mister Sorbo does; I smiled when he slipped in one "Andromeda" reference by saying, "It's never easy." But this movie never even allowed him to *BE* Kevin Sorbo, just a dorky slob. He can at least put this on his resume as acting way _outside_ his character type.

The one bright spot for me (besides the Dylan Hunt quotation mentioned above) was that "Tales of an Ancient Empire" featured no fewer than thirteen strikingly beautiful women. My favorite of these was a blonde named Sarah Ann Schultz, whose face reminded me somewhat of Teri Garr in her prime. Miss Schultz was also a more expressive actress than most of the other women, beautiful or otherwise. But this isn't saying much; acting by both sexes was downright comatose at times.

Sheer humanity forbids me to inflict this pathetic movie on anyone else. It goes in the trash-- which is _not_ home to any of the other Kevin Sorbo material I possess on video. In the DVD's cast interviews, one of the supporting male actors (I believe his name was Sasha Mitchell) remarked that in fantasy movies "there are no rules."

Right. Mister Pyun certainly _didn't_ observe any rules involving consistency, logic or clarity in a film plot.


Last edited by Copperfox; 10-15-2017 at 06:11 PM.
Reply With Quote
Reply

Bookmarks

Tags
bowties are cool

Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off



All times are GMT -4. The time now is 04:13 AM.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.8
Copyright ©2000 - 2017, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.