Dear Glen,
Today, I bought some wooden planks at the hardware store. The people there were not as condescending as I thought they would be. While in line for the man who operates the machine that can cut through anything, my friend made eye contact with the man waiting in front of us. He immediately unfolded a large piece of paper containing a detailed plan of his kitchen and explained it to us. I then told him I was building a shelf. My friend said I didn't even have an electric drill. The man said, oh. I said that I had a little screwdriver and huge muscles. The man hid his disbelief excellently. After the man with the machine had parted the other man's bamboo kitchen boards, we parted ways.
I'll keep you posted about the shelf. I know you believe in me, and that's worth a lot.
Sincerely,
Freckles