Xenithar
New member
So this started out as a parody, but it gained a much more serious tone to it. However, I still like how it turned out. Enjoy!
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The Pevensies have all stumbled into Narnia. After Peter forced Edmund to apologize to the heroine of the next two books, Susan made a most sensible suggestion.
“Let's go back,” she said, throwing her whole body toward the wardrobe.
“Shouldn't we have a look around?” Edmund said sneakily.
“I think Lucy should decide!” Peter said, rolling his head dramatically to the wee girl.
So, we all know what Lucy decided. They went off to “see Mr. Tumnus!”, only to be caught up in a chain of events that would ultimately end in the demise of an other-worldly witch and the crowning of two kings and two queens. But what if Lucy had not decided?
“I think Susan should decide!” Peter cried stochastically, pointing at Susan. The oldest girl of the family sneered and tossed her hair to and fro.
“Like I said, let us all stay alive and go back,” Susan said. Lucy sighed, but Peter agreed with much bravery.
So the children went back into the mansion and closed the wardrobe door behind them. Whenever Lucy tried to go back into the wardrobe, Narnia was never there. Edmund sneaked to the wardrobe several times, wanting more of that Turkish Delight What's-Her-Face promised if he would bring everyone to her. However, his searches were in vain as well, and the children eventually left the mansion.
Meanwhilst, back in Narnia, the White Witch continued to destroy whatever Narnians did not follow her. Aslan disappeared when prophecy failed to be fulfilled, leaving the Narnian army without a leader, and Jadis overthrew the goodly forces and turned them into stone statues for her new garden near the Fords of Beruna. She burned down the forests to allow room for more snow, turning some of the western mountains into money-scheming ski resorts. Ultimately, Narnia finally fell to pieces and became the laughing stock of the surrounding countries. This made Jadis so angry that she accidentally blurted the Deplorable Word and the Narnian world got sucked into a black hole.
“I think Ed should decide,” Peter said reluctantly, not wanting him and his sisters to get all the glory of being good while Edmund was a traitor. Silly Peter.
“Well, you see, I met this wonderful person that has a few gifts for us,” Edmund explained, waving his arms like Mickey Mouse from The Sorcerer's Apprentice at the two mountains to the west.
So his siblings gullibly followed him to the White Witch's Castle. The White Witch threw all four of them into jail, where they underwent various tortures I will not describe here. Consequently Peter, Lucy, and Susan came to despise Edmund. The White Witch, though, seemed to favor the third child, and brought him out and trained him to lead her armies against Aslan. Edmund figured he best make use of the situation, despising his siblings and despising Aslan and all things good that had made the White Witch so grumpy that she wanted to capture and torture them in the first place.
Edmund led all the harpies and werewolves and minotaurs and various other nasty critters to battle at Beruna with the taste of Turkish Delight strong on his tongue while Jadis watched from a distance with an evil chuckle on her lips. Edmund crushed Aslan and his forces, much to Jadis's horror, because Edmund turned on her and destroyed her. He named himself king of Narnia and blackmailed his siblings into serving him in humiliating positions, and Edmund began to go to war against the surrounding countries. As he gained more land, he built Turkish Delight factories, and eventually he monopolized the entire continent and turned it into a dystopia where everyone worshiped Turkish Delight and Edmund Pevensie. All his siblings died from malnourishment, as they were not allowed to eat much besides moldy bread and frozen water.
Still winter, by the way.
“I think I should decide,” Peter stated bravely. Edmund gave him a dirty look as if Peter were the most horrible snob in the world.
“Ooooh you always decide!” Susan began to rant hysterically. “If we hadn't of come here in the first place we would have all stayed normal children and avoided whatever horrors await us!”
“Oh c'mon, Sue!” Peter said cheerfully. “We got this whole world to ourselves! We can have an adventure!”
Peter took them over hill and rill and under tree and rock on several adventures. They learned how to hunt and cook cute little animals. They banded together with talking animals, creating the Band of Wanderers. When the Pevensies saw the oppression the White Witch created, they became vigilantes in destroying army camps, mills, factories for Turkish Delight, and more. Eventually the economy collapsed under the White Witch, and the Narnians began to seriously revolt for want of a new leader and a new government. The goodly armies led by Aslan found the Pevensies, and the Band of Wanderers and Aslan allied.
Eventually they overthrew Jadis, banishing her to the north when she finally surrendered, and Aslan was about to name the now teenage Pevensies kings and queens.
“Y'know, Sir, I feel like going home,” Peter said. He showed many signs of exhaustion, scars from battle and close scrapes through the forests and mountains, skin tanned to an almost brown complexion. His siblings looked quite similar, all toughened and rough from their adventures with the Band of Wanderers.
“Me too.”
“So do I...”
“Yeah.”
Aslan the Lion looked sad, but he blew on them and they went tumbling across Narnia until they came to the Lamppost, and there they found their way through the wardrobe and tumbled back into England. They were soft-fooded childs once more, but all of their eyes still held the sparkle of adventure.
______
The Pevensies have all stumbled into Narnia. After Peter forced Edmund to apologize to the heroine of the next two books, Susan made a most sensible suggestion.
“Let's go back,” she said, throwing her whole body toward the wardrobe.
“Shouldn't we have a look around?” Edmund said sneakily.
“I think Lucy should decide!” Peter said, rolling his head dramatically to the wee girl.
So, we all know what Lucy decided. They went off to “see Mr. Tumnus!”, only to be caught up in a chain of events that would ultimately end in the demise of an other-worldly witch and the crowning of two kings and two queens. But what if Lucy had not decided?
“I think Susan should decide!” Peter cried stochastically, pointing at Susan. The oldest girl of the family sneered and tossed her hair to and fro.
“Like I said, let us all stay alive and go back,” Susan said. Lucy sighed, but Peter agreed with much bravery.
So the children went back into the mansion and closed the wardrobe door behind them. Whenever Lucy tried to go back into the wardrobe, Narnia was never there. Edmund sneaked to the wardrobe several times, wanting more of that Turkish Delight What's-Her-Face promised if he would bring everyone to her. However, his searches were in vain as well, and the children eventually left the mansion.
Meanwhilst, back in Narnia, the White Witch continued to destroy whatever Narnians did not follow her. Aslan disappeared when prophecy failed to be fulfilled, leaving the Narnian army without a leader, and Jadis overthrew the goodly forces and turned them into stone statues for her new garden near the Fords of Beruna. She burned down the forests to allow room for more snow, turning some of the western mountains into money-scheming ski resorts. Ultimately, Narnia finally fell to pieces and became the laughing stock of the surrounding countries. This made Jadis so angry that she accidentally blurted the Deplorable Word and the Narnian world got sucked into a black hole.
“I think Ed should decide,” Peter said reluctantly, not wanting him and his sisters to get all the glory of being good while Edmund was a traitor. Silly Peter.
“Well, you see, I met this wonderful person that has a few gifts for us,” Edmund explained, waving his arms like Mickey Mouse from The Sorcerer's Apprentice at the two mountains to the west.
So his siblings gullibly followed him to the White Witch's Castle. The White Witch threw all four of them into jail, where they underwent various tortures I will not describe here. Consequently Peter, Lucy, and Susan came to despise Edmund. The White Witch, though, seemed to favor the third child, and brought him out and trained him to lead her armies against Aslan. Edmund figured he best make use of the situation, despising his siblings and despising Aslan and all things good that had made the White Witch so grumpy that she wanted to capture and torture them in the first place.
Edmund led all the harpies and werewolves and minotaurs and various other nasty critters to battle at Beruna with the taste of Turkish Delight strong on his tongue while Jadis watched from a distance with an evil chuckle on her lips. Edmund crushed Aslan and his forces, much to Jadis's horror, because Edmund turned on her and destroyed her. He named himself king of Narnia and blackmailed his siblings into serving him in humiliating positions, and Edmund began to go to war against the surrounding countries. As he gained more land, he built Turkish Delight factories, and eventually he monopolized the entire continent and turned it into a dystopia where everyone worshiped Turkish Delight and Edmund Pevensie. All his siblings died from malnourishment, as they were not allowed to eat much besides moldy bread and frozen water.
Still winter, by the way.
“I think I should decide,” Peter stated bravely. Edmund gave him a dirty look as if Peter were the most horrible snob in the world.
“Ooooh you always decide!” Susan began to rant hysterically. “If we hadn't of come here in the first place we would have all stayed normal children and avoided whatever horrors await us!”
“Oh c'mon, Sue!” Peter said cheerfully. “We got this whole world to ourselves! We can have an adventure!”
Peter took them over hill and rill and under tree and rock on several adventures. They learned how to hunt and cook cute little animals. They banded together with talking animals, creating the Band of Wanderers. When the Pevensies saw the oppression the White Witch created, they became vigilantes in destroying army camps, mills, factories for Turkish Delight, and more. Eventually the economy collapsed under the White Witch, and the Narnians began to seriously revolt for want of a new leader and a new government. The goodly armies led by Aslan found the Pevensies, and the Band of Wanderers and Aslan allied.
Eventually they overthrew Jadis, banishing her to the north when she finally surrendered, and Aslan was about to name the now teenage Pevensies kings and queens.
“Y'know, Sir, I feel like going home,” Peter said. He showed many signs of exhaustion, scars from battle and close scrapes through the forests and mountains, skin tanned to an almost brown complexion. His siblings looked quite similar, all toughened and rough from their adventures with the Band of Wanderers.
“Me too.”
“So do I...”
“Yeah.”
Aslan the Lion looked sad, but he blew on them and they went tumbling across Narnia until they came to the Lamppost, and there they found their way through the wardrobe and tumbled back into England. They were soft-fooded childs once more, but all of their eyes still held the sparkle of adventure.
