"lower the volume you two!" Aryana fumbled turned the nob of washing machine as soon as she had closed the lid and pressed start.
"Mommy this too!" She turned around to see her little five year old daughter holding out her pyjama pants, smiling hugely, biting her lip. This is a face that she go quite often from Payal and despite everything, it did not speak trouble.
"Why didn't you give me that before?" Aryana asked vaguely as she threw it in the washing machine, closing the lid again.
Payal skipped away back into the living room to watch cartoons with her 4 year old sister, Jayna. The two of them sat so close to the television screen one would think that at any moment, they'd be ready to jump in when one of their favorite Dragon Tale's character would call another over.
After washing the dishes, Aryana went to fold the laundry. She brought the basket up to her room and dumped it on the king size bed. So big, she thought of the room. So empty. It was a beautiful day outside, but the sun still felt too distant, and whether the weather was to her liking or not, it seemed like that did not change the atmosphere. It did not bring more children and people in the streets. It did not urbanize the place the least bit. She was, after all, in the suburbs, and a new area at that. Theirs was the first house in the area. You could see tall grass all around them. Over the years, houses had gone up, and they now had neighbors, but to no avail. They stayed home all day. They never came to say hello. None of them. Sometimes they looked weirdly. At day, they'd all be gone to work.
Aryana had been living in the area, and country, for all of 5 years. Time only created her wounds, and they only made her feel more trapped, and less hopeful. She hadn't known what it would be like here. She missed living with a family with people whom she could talk to. Maybe someone who could help her with the girls. They were lovely, but it would be good for them, too.
She got lonely a lot of the time. There weren't many people of her kind, and she didn't speak the greatest English. She didn't think the same as them either, and what she did not know was that she did not think the same as the ones who actually did speak the same language and look the same as her.
She had been excited when she got married. What would it be like to go abroad, to Europe? Oh the people there! How amazed she was to see people with skin so clear and pale. People back home would do anything for skin like that. And their hair! They had golden hair! And beautiful eyes. But oh, they never did wear enough clothes. She never really felt comfortable standing next to a woman in short shorts and a tiny tank top. She loved Europe though. Her husband's family was there and it was a good transition, and there were many people of their ethnicity and so it was nice to have that bit in common.
It became slightly miserable, when her mother-in-law would put her down. And when her husband left to North America, the in laws showed their true colors. Many times she'd catch them listening in on their conversation over the phone, and she wouldn't be able to do anything about it. And even more times, they wouldn't let her talk to him. They'd lie to him and tell him that she wasn't around and then tell her afterward even when she asked to call her if he called. The two girls, then not more than 1 years old, sometimes became a burden, and often her desperate face got no response when it plead for help to another.
And then, finally, her husband had called and they moved to North America. She loved Europe. She did not want to leave, and if she left to there, it would mean she'd be twice as far from back home.
{continue later}
