Cheese Whiz II

So basically you're impaling because you're a mad linguist.

Lovely. It's great to see people integrate their college education throughout their adult life.
 
When it comes to excuses, yes. The latest gems were "My bike went too slow" and "I had to finish cooking". Also, the essay about compulsory attendance which said, "Another argument in favor is that in class, professors sometimes say interesting things or tell you what's going to be on the exam." And that's the university prep course. *covers face with hands and weeps*
 
I've been grading my younger brother's essays for years, so I know the pain.... And then there were my student teaching days, when students would sometimes literally copy sentences from the textbook for their "essays"--and the sentences wouldn't even answer the essay prompt. Fortunately, those were the low-level students in my CP courses, which stands for "College Prep" and meant the students who were unlikely to go to college.

Educators believe in nothing if not self-esteem-building misnomers.
 
At this rate I can see we're going to clarify a lot of things. CIA stands for "Certainly Irritating Again," and....
 
...the CIA is not amused. Also, your brother wasn't supposed to have that lawnmower accident, and the person who was supposed to have that accident was not meant to survive that accident.

So I'd just stay clear of the toaster for now if I were you.
 
The lawn mower just shut down on my brother this morning, and he couldn't get it to start again. Unless the CIA are trying to annoy him to death, they should probably try a different tactic.
 
He would probably like that idea. It's never a good sign when my brother likes things. He thinks that the Balrog is the best character in LotR and that Shan Yu is the best character in Mulan.

If you agree with him, I'm going to tell Sushi that you would like him to write an opera in your honor. That's not a threat, that's a promise.
 
I take it you have never witnessed one of Sushi's operas.... Anyway, you have managed to annoy him enough to write one. The title is The Oedipal Tragedy of Hamlet and Freckles, Upon Whom Kronos Looks with Disfavor, as They Face the Unusually Strong Resentment of Ishtar the Everlasting.

Yes, you can have front-row tickets to the premier. That's the spitting gallery, so no one else wants the seats.
 
I wear a helmet to the opera anyway (one whose color matches my handbag and shoes, of course).

By the way. In a world where even "Les Misérables" is too long a title for people to bother with, I have little hope for The Oedipal Etc. What happens when you tell Sushi to go with the times?
 
Er, fits of rage, stampedes, uprooting the forum lamppost, etc.

It's really not a good idea to tell him that his creative genius is outdated.
 
That could be appealing to an audience. I have a particular interest in the success of an opera whose title includes my name... and not an overwhelming love for the lamppost.
 
Um, pretty sure you just did a heresy. You are supposed to value the lamppost more than you value your apartment, your bicycle, the dust bunnies beneath your bed....
 
Yes, but the Can expects you to treat the lamppost with an appropriate valuation of its worth. You have gone against the will of the Can and are, therefore, a heretic.
 
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