Mermaid in the Sand

Here's more.....


They talked at night for several nights,until he had to go.A few weeks later he came back with his dad.
Sandy came up where his boat was anchored, he was sitting on the end of the boat, she smiled up at him."Hello."
"Hey."Robert was in his swimming trunks and a tshirt. He liked the way she looked, her arms on the wooden deck,her face set on her hands,her sandy blonde hair hung over her back and into the ocean. He stood took his t-shirt off and dived into the water.
Sandy swam over to him."What are you doing?"She adked,
"My dad said I could swim tonight."Robert told her.
"OK."Sandy smiled."But watch out for sharks."
"I didn't think about that."Robert smiled at her."Thanks.:
They swam a little while."Rober, how long have I known you?"Sandy asked him. She swam in a circle.
"About two or three months." Robert replied he sat on the back of the boat again."Why?"
"Just wondering."Sandy looked up at him her blue eyes shinning.
Robert shrugged."You're the princess right?"
"Yes."Sandy swam over to the boat.
"The medallion it's very...different."Robert told her."You know I really like you."
Sandy didn't say anything,she pushed up on the deck pulling half her body out of the water."YOu do?"
"Yes."Robert whispered he kissed her lightly....


I've got to go before I get into trouble. How was it???

DestinyLies~
 
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I have a few things to say but I'll start with a couple:
Are you finished the story? Are you making the drafts of portions of the story you're posting on here as clean as possible (clean meaning editing), so we can tell you properly what we think you should do?

She asks him in the last part how she knew he was a princess, but she TOLD him herself. So i think you should edit that. And after three months of knowing each other, I think he'd know even if she hadn't told, unless that was part of the story.

This is fun. I don't usually come to the writer's club :D
 
umbrellaxscenexcore said:
I have a few things to say but I'll start with a couple:
Are you finished the story? Are you making the drafts of portions of the story you're posting on here as clean as possible (clean meaning editing), so we can tell you properly what we think you should do?

She asks him in the last part how she knew he was a princess, but she TOLD him herself. So i think you should edit that. And after three months of knowing each other, I think he'd know even if she hadn't told, unless that was part of the story.

This is fun. I don't usually come to the writer's club :D
Click to expand...
She did?? OH I didn't realize that. Yes I am editing it and no it's not finished!!!! I"m glad you like it. I"ll try to post more!!!
 
Thanks...ok here's just alittle something extra from another story that I'll put in until I can add to this story....



Pyralis Edana lie underneath a peach tree at the Grove on Hogwarts grounds. Her orange streaked brown hair lay fanned out in the grass....her chocolate brown eyes were closed. She heard footsteps comeing towards her and opened her eyes. She smiled and sat up when she saw her boyfriend Joseph Granger comeing standing above her. "Hey." She said.
"Hey." Joseph's smooth voice melted her. "What are you doing?" He sat down next to her in the grass.

"Nothing just napping." Pyralis shrugged and smiled at him.

"Can I nap with you?" Joseph teased her, his own brown eyes sparkled.

Pyralis glared her "glare of doom" at him...he laughed. "NO!" She hissed.
"I'm kidding." He told her, he pulled her close to him."Can I atleast kiss you?"

A smile came to Pyralis's pink lips."Yes, you may." She nodded.
Joseph leaned down and pressed his mouth against hers. He fealt his heart melting,he pulled back before anyone could tell on them.

Pyralis touched the tip of her nose to his. "Satisfied?" She teased him.
"Yes, Pyr, I am." Joseph nodded, he rubbed his nose over hers.....


How do ya'll like that story??? Sorry it's just something that came off the top of my head.

~DestinyLies
 
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