Okay I'm here. Where's Mr. Tumnus?

ahh there you are mate, a nicely warmed sconed to perfection. Now must i set up a S.P.E.W for us fauns to have work with tea again? This is quite the discrimination and i demand changes now! So yeah, i'm serving tea, i don't cry too often. Just when i do bad things. Which is so rarely now.

tg
 
Don't eat those scones, Perpet-Poe! They were prepared by a -- ahem -- an unauthorized personage! If you will kindly wait while I wash my hands, as a human I am authorized to serve. Tumnus is a worthy faun, but you see, non-humanoids just aren't allowed to be food service workers. The hair nets, for one thing, just can't catch it all.

And there is no need for any SPEW, Tumnus old chap. We're not trying to force you to work -- we're trying to relieve you of work, so just move slowly out of the kitchen, there's a good faun, right?
 
Nay! We wish to work you evil fiends! I shall stomp you with my hoofs and regain my honour.

Care for a bundtcake would you dear?

tg
 
No need for all that fuss, Tumnus! And do stop handling the pastries! You can serve all the cakes and ices you like in your own cave, but what with the health regulations and all, we just can't have you serving in the Narniafans reception room. It's not personal -- just with those reports of mad-satyr disease, one can't be too careful.

Now just put down that biscuit tin and come along quietly!
 
I will not, i have no such madness in me. Quite the contrary all love comes from me. No more, no less! I will not leave this place, it was mine from the beginning. Why must you insist on me leaving, do you not like me anymore. Don't like the conversations we shared? *cries*

tg
 
Oh, dear Mr. Tumnus! Don't cry, really, you shouldn't cry ...

(I knew this would happen.)

Here, use my handkerchief, there's a good faun. Of course you don't have mad satyr disease, and of course everyone wants to have tea with you. Just dry your eyes and put the kettle on. We'll have a nice orange pekoe, and you can serve the scones. How's that? There, how would that be? You're the best tea server we have, old chap. Just stop crying now ...

(Will someone get in here and let Tumnus serve you some tea? He's on another crying jag ...)
 
I thought I was seving tea! You all replace me because I'm different! *cries*

It's not my fault I'm crazy! *cries again*
 
No, no, Holyboy, don't you cry, too!

Of course you are having tea.

Dear Mr. Tumnus just made a fresh pot, and he will be along with some nice warm scones. There, dry your eyes.

Tea for everyone.
 
Splendid, splendid, that's the spirit Tumnus old boy. You can serve scones, and tea, and anything else you like. Just don't cry any more, really, it's very distressing. Come along and bring those scones for Holyboy, there's a good faun.
 
Dear me - this blubbering has only begun since I was forced to hide my whip away. I tell ya - 'spare the rod, spoil the child'. Bring back corporal punishment i say!!!
 
Don't you start fussing! We'll have another tear-gusher on our hands if people see you threatening to beat them! Tumnus is such a sensitive fellow. Just eat your scones and behave.
 
why did you even bring a whip anyway? besides, pass the earl grey please. with these "scones" you could replace the "c" with a "t" and still get the same thing. ;) besides, to all you londoners i respect alot of todays leaders, even the queen, even though she is not my queen. dont worry though, im not an american, im a texan. :D ive always wanted to say that. by the way, after you all have treated fauns in such a horrid way i must ask you do you always feel this way about hybrids? and do you feel this way about gryphons? everything that has a though or a word should be respected. especially if hes the one pouring tea.
 
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Gryphon said:
to all you londoners i respect alot of todays leaders, even the queen
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If you are talking to WHB, better say "all you Brits" or he will smack you with that whip.

gryphon said:
everything that has a thought or a word should be respected. especially if hes the one pouring tea.
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Quite, it was just the insurance people putting the screws to us about the threat of mad satyr disease and the immense liability if we let him serve tea.

(But that's all handled, Tumnus, don't cry!)

But I must say, I have known some creatures with a few thoughts and A LOT of words who didn't deserve respect!
:eek:
 
*wanders in after seeing mention of tea and cakes*
*See's it's only scones that have been there for several days and wanders out again*
*comes back in with bacon sarnies and a pint of Guinness*

Hi Gryphon, if I haven't welcomed you yet then please accept this as one, but if i have then you've had 2 and I'd like one back please.
 
Gryphon said:
why did you even bring a whip anyway? besides, pass the earl grey please. with these "scones" you could replace the "c" with a "t" and still get the same thing. ;) besides, to all you londoners i respect alot of todays leaders, even the queen, even though she is not my queen. dont worry though, im not an american, im a texan. :D ive always wanted to say that. by the way, after you all have treated fauns in such a horrid way i must ask you do you always feel this way about hybrids? and do you feel this way about gryphons? everything that has a though or a word should be respected. especially if hes the one pouring tea.
Click to expand...

Grrrrrrrrrr......... :mad: Too late Ive seen it inkspot!!!!

I AM NOT A LONDONER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
 
ok Brits. but WHB said he was from N london and where i come from people who come from london are thought of as londoners. dont worry WHB all texans have stereotypes too. we dont always say howdy and ive never seen a real rodeo. i didnt know being called a londoner was so bad. i dont like being thought of as a hick either so just for you WHB i'll call you a true Britt and a patriot. deal? *turns to rosy and hands her a scone says to inkspot* its never good to have all words and no thoughts. your right.
 
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Gryphon said:
ok Brits. but WHB said he was from N london and where i come from people who come from london are thought of as londoners. dont worry WHB all texans have stereotypes too. we dont always say howdy and ive never seen a real rodeo. i didnt know being called a londoner was so bad. i dont like being thought of as a hick either so just for you WHB i'll call you a true Britt and a patriot. deal? *turns to rosy and hands her a scone says to inkspot* its never good to have all words and no thoughts. your right.
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Yer alright chappie!!

My location is sposed to be ironic for those Yanks who believe that London=England. I live in a COMPLETELY different city called Leeds. I'm offended that you havent heard of it :( Nah - only jokin!!! :D

I might have to start teaching lessons on England to all you lot - you're all hopeless...... *walks off with scone crumbs all over his face and strawberry jam on t-shirt, shaking head*
 
Rosy, pass the Guiness, hey? And WHB, will you bring back some fish and chips? Gryphon here could do with a nibble, I'm sure. Tumnus made all that fuss about serving tea, and now where has he disappeared to? If he's fraternizing with that White Witch again, I don't know what I'll do. :mad:
 
here you go Inky, now you just be careful there I don't wnt to have to clean up after you!
I heard Tumnus was off opening a pizza resturant somewhere in Rome - let the Italians deal with him for a while!
 
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