The King Of Goodland

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There once lived a young man name Tom. He was an author and often wrote stories of magical lands. One day when he was working on his latest chapter in his book called Goodland he felt strange, almost as if he were being pulled into a black hole with his pencil and paper. When it all stopped he found himself standing on a large hill while staring at a castle that looked just like the one in his book. Tom was confused.



I`l post more later if this is good.
 
It sounds like you have a good plot line figured out, but I think it would be much better if you added details... you could easily quadruple the size of that paragraph by adding details, describing the character and the setting, etc. Unless that's supposed to be a prologue or something...
 
Your Sister Lila said:
It sounds like you have a good plot line figured out, but I think it would be much better if you added details... you could easily quadruple the size of that paragraph by adding details, describing the character and the setting, etc. Unless that's supposed to be a prologue or something...
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Thanks. It`s supposed to be the shortest chapter.
 
Tom wondered what was going on. A small badger that looked like the one in his story walked up to him. ''Wait are you Scruffles the badger?'',said Tom confused. ''Yes your majesty,and I`m here to warn you about the pen you have'',said the badger. ''What about it?'',asked Tom. The badger replied,''That pen you purchased is dangerous. It`s filled with dark magic. The man you bought this pen from wasn`t supposed to give it to you because it holds the history of your world and my world and he wants it back.''

''But how do you know all this?'',asked Tom. The badger laughed,''You created me.'' ''I`m confused'',said Tom. ''Of course your majesty'',said Scruffles. ''Why do you keep calling me your majesty?'',said Tom. ''Well don`t you know? You are the king!'',said Scruffles.
 
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