Me, a DUFFER?!? (please do not delete)

Am I a duffer?

  • Yes

    Votes: 101 87.1%

  • No

    Votes: 15 12.9%
  • Total voters
    116
And how mayest thou become friends with that which hath killed thee? And I must assume that thou dost not know the meaning of this word 'incinerated', for if thou had known thou would have realized that thy body is burnt to a cinder, and all thy consciousness hath fled. And moreover this star hath not a mind, nor a soul, but is rather a great ball of flaming gases that doth melt, yea, and vaporize all that cometh near to it. And now thou dost see that doubly thine actions are at fault, first for realizing not that thou art passed from life, and second for attempting to befriend that which liveth not.
 
And wherefore cometh these smileys, oh FF? Art thou amused by my own usage of this mode of speech? And if it is so, know thee this: Thou wouldst do well to speak similarly, for if thou wishest to become a Duffer thou needs must speak so, for 'tis one of the mighty traditions of Duffers. And if thou wishest for more example, thou needs must do no more than click on those links which are presented at the bottom of the first post in that thread of the Order of the Can, yea, verily even those links which do lead to the Duffer Required Reading. And when thou hast read them, do thou post in like manner, that all may know of thy knowledge.
 
Ay, verily 'tis so, oh L_A, for Duffers hath spoken it for as long as memory can tell, and even so doth this Forum hold mighty traditions, that all Duffers may hear and obey. For 'tis no secret that Duffers are not of sane mind, and it hath been said of them: "Who knows why they do anything?" And mark thee well this, oh L_A, for 'tis of great import: that thou mayst never call Duffers of sane mind, for 'tis a deadly insult to those such as they.
 
Ay, and this topic of Potatoes doth lighten my heart, and I am joyful, for Potatoes are omong my favorite dishes. And whether they shoulds be baked, or boiled, or slice and fried, it matters not, I like them the same. And if one shouldst attempt to remove from me my Potatoes, he shouldst beware, for I am swift in my wrath at those who make such foolhardy attmepts. :p
 
And I must assume that thou art ignorant, oh Catherine, or of idiot intelligence, for did I not just now state that 'tis death to remove from me my potatoes? And I must assume that 'tis through ignorance that thou doest so, and for thy ignorance I shall spare thee, and thou shouldst be grateful for this. *glare*
 
Back
Top