Science trivia

This is slightly off topic, but I thought it might be enjoyed. :D

There is a farmer who is having problems with his chickens. All of the sudden, they are all getting very sick and he doesn't know what is wrong with them. After trying all conventional means, he calls a biologist, a chemist, and a physicist to see if they can figure out what is wrong. The biologist looks at the chickens, examines them a bit, and says he has no idea what could be wrong with them. Then the chemist takes some tests and makes some measurements, but he can't come to any conclusions either. So the physicist tries. He stands there and looks at the chickens for a long time without touching them or anything. Then all of the sudden he starts scribbling away in a notebook. Finally, after several gruesome calculations, he exclaims, 'I've got it! But it only works for spherical chickens in a vacuum.'​


Also:
Are you a Physics major?

Due to the enormous workload involved in physics classes combined with stress and lack of sleep, physics students often forget (either by accident, defense mechanism, or intentionally) what their major really is. Thus, as a physics major, I took it upon myself to create a small list of indicators to help us all remember what we really are.

YOU MIGHT BE A PHYSICS MAJOR...

* if you have no life - and you can PROVE it mathematically.
* if you enjoy pain.
* if you know vector calculus but you can't remember how to do long division.
* if you chuckle whenever anyone says 'centrifugal force.'
* if you've actually used every single function on your graphing calculator.
* if when you look in a mirror, you see a physics major.
* if it is sunny and 70 degrees outside, and you are working on a computer.
* if you always do homework on Friday and Saturday nights.
* if you know how to integrate a chicken and can take the derivative of water.
* if you think in 'math.'
* if you've calculated that the World Series actually diverges.
* if you hesitate to look at something because you don't want to break down its wave function.
* if you have a pet named after a scientist.
* if you laugh at jokes about mathematicians.
* if the Humane society has you arrested because you actually performed the Schrodinger's Cat experiment.
* if you can't remember what's behind the door in the science building which says 'Exit.'
* if you have to bring a jacket with you, in the middle of summer, because there's a wind-chill factor in the lab.
* if you are completely addicted to PhysLink.com.
* if you avoid doing anything because you don't want to contribute to the eventual heat-death of the universe.
* if you consider ANY non-science course 'easy.'
* if when your professor asks you where your homework is, you claim to have accidentally determined its momentum so precisely, that according to Heisenberg it could be anywhere in the universe.
* if the 'fun' center of your brain has deteriorated from lack of use.
* if you'll assume that a 'horse' is a 'sphere' in order to make the math easier.
* if you understood more than five of these indicators.
* if you make a hard copy of this list, and post it on your door.

If these indicators apply to you, there is good reason to suspect that you might be classified as a physics major. I hope this clears up any confusion.

Created by Jason Lisle. Edited by Anton Skorucak of PhysLink.com​



(Yes, I collect physics humor. :p)
 
hahaha, Derny I love both of those! They're both so true!

And actually, at least half of that list applies to me :eek: :)
 
I should hope so! :D

Here's something to watch out for:

At the physics exam: 'Describe the universe in 200 words and give three examples.'

:eek:
 
LOL...

Actually, about half of those apply to me to. Lemme think...

1. yes
2. no
3. yes
4. yes
5. yes
6. no
7. yes
8. yes
9. no
10. yes
11. no
12. no
13. no
14. yes
15. no
16. no
17. no
18. yes
19. yes
20. no
21. no
22. yes
23. no


I probably missed a couple... you should have numbered those initially, Derny. :D
 
Derny said:
All right, prove to me mathematically that you have no life. *waits*
Click to expand...

Well... let us construct 45 degree right triangles DEF and FER. Let triangle DEF correspond to Physics, and triangle FER correspond to me. Triangles DEF and FER are similar (all 45-degree right triangles are similar). Therefore, since I am similar to physics, I have a natural propensity for the science. Now, let us consider that Physics uses many irrational numbers. The sine of 45 degrees is 1/\sqrt2, therefore I am an irrational number, therefore I am a physics major.
 
Your logic is faulty, and your premises uncertain. You have not proven that you have no life, nor attempted to do so. And that was geometry, not math.

What are we coming to?
 
*grinds teeth* Olórin . . . Have you ever thought about why it was you got water dumped on you?

The point is, you didn't do it mathematically, you did it 'trigonometricaly' . . . and all the other points stand. *hmph*
 
Olórin the Wise said:
Well... let us construct 45 degree right triangles DEF and FER. Let triangle DEF correspond to Physics, and triangle FER correspond to me. Triangles DEF and FER are similar (all 45-degree right triangles are similar). Therefore, since I am similar to physics, I have a natural propensity for the science. Now, let us consider that Physics uses many irrational numbers. The sine of 45 degrees is 1/\sqrt2, therefore I am an irrational number, therefore I am a physics major.
Click to expand...

Seems to me that you just 'proved' that you were a physics major. Not that you have no life. :rolleyes:
 
Even allowing that, where do you get the proof that you and physics are similar, and that you may therefore use the same angle to represent yourself and Physics?
 
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