The Adventures of Pete and the Pals

When we got back home, us Pals immediately ran for Pete’s apartment, where we decided the wonders of Netflix Instant would be a great way to block out our troubles for a while.

What went on during the next few practices is better left unrecorded. The only thing we’ll mention is that the saying on one of the girls’ shirts was very appropriate: It’s Cute How You Think I’m Actually Listening to You. After what seemed like centuries, it was finally the night of the play. The daycare had rented a little theater, and we spent hours getting it ready. Tim and Evelyn showed up about an hour late, looked nervous.

“Amy’s coming!” Tim said.

It took about a minute for the full meaning of this to sink in.

“The fixed-up script!” Sally gasped.

“Maybe she won’t remember the other version,” Teddy said without much hope.

“Not a chance,” said Tim.

“She might miss the bus,” said Rory.

“No way. She’s always punctual,” said Evelyn.

Johnny, as always, had a wild suggestion. “I say we send her an anonymous letter embellished with skulls and crossbones, telling her to stay away or else.”

“She’d know it was us,” Henry pointed out. “Who else would want her to stay away from a kiddie play? Not to mention that threatening anonymous letters are against the law.”

“We’ll just have to live with consequences,” Pete said reluctantly.

“That’s easy for you to say,” Tim muttered.

Just then, Evelyn’s emergencies-only cell phone rang, solving our problem. It was Amy, calling to say that she’d have to miss the play due to having to work overtime.

“Saved!” Johnny cheered, tossing the battery-powered flashing wand into the air.

Cheered up by this unexpected good luck, we continued our set-up. As the final piece, we carefully brought out the carriage, which Pete’s dad had dropped off because it was too big for bus transportation.

“I just KNOW it’s gonna get wrecked,” Tim groaned. “And I don’t know about you guys, but I don’t want there to be...uh....something to pay.”

“Relax,” said Pete. “Nothing will happen. Just keep telling yourself that.”

Tim, still looking nervous, hid the carriage behind a stack of costumes.

We had told the kids to show up at 5:30 so we could run through things one more time. The first one finally showed up at 5:45, and the rest came a few minutes later. We had just enough time for one more rehearsal. Then Tim brought out the carriage.

“This is what we were telling you about,” said Evelyn. “Now, remember, only Jacob, Dylan, and Maggie can touch it. We’re only borrowing it, and it’s really expensive.”

“Why can’t the rest of us touch it?” whined Chloe.

“Evelyn just told you,” said Irene. “Now, let’s get into our costumes.”
 
GGray said:

Johnny, as always, had a wild suggestion. “I say we send her an anonymous letter embellished with skulls and crossbones, telling her to stay away or else.”

“She’d know it was us,” Henry pointed out. “Who else would want her to stay away from a kiddie play? Not to mention that threatening anonymous letters are against the law.”
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:D

I'm very eager to read about the night's events. :D
 
Zella said:
Probably try to fix it with superglue or something, but without success.:p
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I can totally see that happening. xP Henry would be telling them that it's illegal to borrow someone's possession, break it, and try to deceive the owner, and Johnny would come up with some sort of movie reference. :p
 
Zella said:
Is it even possible the carriage will survive?:eek::p
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Hmmmm...;)


This was more complicated than it sounded because Maddalee and Norah decided to trade gowns. Of course, all the kids wanted to follow suit.

“Hey, everybody just wear the one you’re holding!” shouted Anna Rose over the bedlam.

“I’ve got two capes,” said Noah.

“Well, who doesn’t have one?” asked Sally.

“Blaine,” said Chloe.

“Okay, give one to him. And please hurry.”

Finally, the kids were all ready and waiting in their places. Johnny and Teddy went to pull back the curtains.

“Uh, it’s stuck!” Teddy said after some unsuccessful yanking.

“Great!” said Evelyn. “Now what?”

“I’ll climb up there and see what’s wrong,” Johnny offered. “There’s a ladder.”

“Well...okay,” said Evelyn. “Just be careful.”

Johnny scampered up the ladder, then leaned down. “Hey, Rory. Toss me a flashlight.”

“Uh, that’s not such a good idea...” said Tim as Rory wound up and flung the heavy flashlight in Johnny’s general direction. There was a thump and a yelp, and then a crash.

“He fell!” Cullen yelled.

“It’s just the flashlight,” said Anna Rose.

“Hey, I said toss, not fling,” came Johnny’s annoyed voice. “Never mind. I see the problem. It’s a tangled rope. I got it...”

There was another loud crash.

“That’s him,” said Cullen eagerly. “Can I call the hospital? My teacher taught me how. Look!” He pulled out a cell phone (this kid was SIX, people).

“Sorry to disappoint you, but I’m fine,” Johnny called down.

“Then what was that crash?” said Cullen suspiciously.

“Somebody’s lunch box,” Johnny explained.

“Hurry up and get down!” said Sally. “You have to start the opening narration! And remember, no slipping in extra comments.”

“Hey, when’s this thing starting?” screeched a rude member of the audience. “I can’t believe Mom dragged me away from my Xbox 360 to stare at a curtain!”

“Wonder who the Spiker wannabe is?” grumbled Rory, kicking the dented lunch box offstage.

“That’s my brother,” said Aiden. “He’s a 360 wizard.”

“Is everybody in their places?” asked Evelyn. “Great!”

This time, Johnny and Teddy were successful, and the curtains opened to reveal Maggie, sweeping the stage. When she saw the audience, she froze for a few seconds, then launched into sweeping at warp speed.

“Slow down!” hissed Johnny from the wings before turning on his microphone and starting the narration.

“Once upon a time, there was this girl named Cinderella, whose mother died when she was just a kid. Her father soon fell in love and married this other woman. He was so in love that he missed a couple of little things about her, like she was evil and selfish and bullied kids and had two little mini-monsters...er....daughters.....that were just like her. Actually—I’m gonna ramble here for a second—my personal theory is that she was after him for his cash and held back the Evulz til after the funeral. Oh, wait, let’s backtrack. He died. Now, that’s just a little too convenient to be a natural event. She probably poisoned him. Anyway, her Evulz busted loose after he was in the ground, and she treated Cinderella like a personal slave. Amazingly, Cinderella put up with this for a long time—we’re talking years here. In case you’re wondering why nobody did anything about this, CPS wasn’t around back then. So, by the time this story starts, Cinderella is like of marriageable age.”

While Johnny was spouting this monologue (most of which wasn’t even scripted), Maggie was mechanically sweeping. A simultaneous glare from the rest of us shut him off, and Sally motioned the stepmother and stepsisters onstage.
 
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“Hey, when’s this thing starting?” screeched a rude member of the audience. “I can’t believe Mom dragged me away from my Xbox 360 to stare at a curtain!”
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Hee hee. :D

I can't wait to hear the rest of the things the boys add into the script!
 
“You missed a spot,” sneered Stepsister One.

“When you’re done with this, I need a foot massage,” said Stepsister Two.

“Uh, no. She’s doing my nails,” said One. “I claimed her first.”

“You had her last!” whined Two. “It’s my turn!”

“Why do you need a foot massage? You only walk from your bed to the mirror.”

“So? The mirror is FIVE WHOLE INCHES from my bed!”

“Girls, stop this silly argument,” ordered the stepmother. “I get her next.”

The fight was interrupted by a knock (really Teddy hammering the floor in the wings).

“Well? Answer the door!” the stepmother told Cinderella.

“But my massage!” whined Two.

“You must learn patience,” said the stepmother. “Now, open the door already, Cinderella!”

Cinderella ducked offstage and returned with the footman.

“I have this royal degree!” he announced, unrolling a scroll and accidentally knocking off the stepmother’s glasses. Fortunately, Summer was good at improv.

“Cinderella, get those,” she ordered, then turned to the footman. “Well?”

“Uh...the king and queen are having this ball for the prince tonight...” Jaxon had obviously forgotten his lines. “And...oh, yeah, the prince wants all the ladies to be there. But not the married ones. He doesn’t want them.”

“Couldn’t he just use a dating site like the rest of the world?” muttered Johnny, forgetting his mike was still on. Several parents looked annoyed.

“There’re here to see their kids, not you, attention hog,” hissed Henry. Somehow, the mike picked this up, too. A few people chuckled. Johnny gave Henry an evil glare and switched off the mike.

“Uh, can I go now?” asked the footman loudly.

“Yeah, you can leave,” said the stepmother, shoving him offstage.

“Ooooh! I’m getting a new dress, right?” gushed One.

“If anybody’s getting a new dress, it’s me,” snapped Two. “My dresses are so early 1300's!”

“Girls, girls. We’ll all be getting new dresses,” said the stepmother. “Except Cinderella, of course.”

“I’m getting pink,” said One.

“No, I am!” shouted Two.

“Why don’t you both get pink dresses?” said Cinderella.

“Cinderella, stop causing fights!” scolded the stepmother. “And don’t talk without asking me first! Now, come on, girls. Let’s get ready.”

The step-trio hurried offstage for their costume change, and the curtains closed.
 
The kids are naturals at acting badly, so this must come easily for them. :D
I love the part where Johnny speaks into the microphone, suggesting a dating site for the prince. xP
 
“End of Act One, and things aren’t looking so good for Cinderella,” announced Johnny...and then he remembered the mike was off and had to repeat it.

“How many acts are in this thing?” the Xbox wizard groaned loud enough to be heard clearly.

“Now, Logan, make an effort to enjoy your brother’s play,” his mother replied.

“Hurry up! The audience is getting restless!” Sally whispered. Everybody rushed to their spots, and the curtain opened. Cinderella was tying the sash on Two’s dress.

“Tighter!” Two ordered. “And remember, medium-sized bows are now in style.”

One was supposed to say her line next, but she forgot. After a few seconds of silence, Cinderella stood up.

“Can’t I go to the ball, too?” she asked. “The prince did ask for all unmarried ladies.”

“Yeah, well, there wasn’t anything in that letter about it being a law. It was just a request,” said the stepmother. “Come on, girls. Let’s go. Cinderella, clean the house while we’re gone.”

“But I cleaned it already,” said Cinderella.

“Then mess it up and clean it again!” called One as they swept offstage.

Cinderella sat down and started to cry. Well, she was supposed to. Instead she kind of hid her face in her hands and made exaggerated sobbing sounds.

“I still say we should have used enforced method acting and told her she could never have any candy again, ever,” Johnny whispered to Pete. “That would have gotten real tears out of her.”

“Yeah, and get in trouble with her parents,” Pete replied. “This is fine.”

Sophia tapped Pete’s arm with the battery-powered flashing wand. “Do I go on now?”

“Not yet!” Pete said. “I’ll tell you when.”

Cinderella lifted her head. “Oh, I wish I could go to the ball!”

Pete nodded to Sophia. “Okay, now.”

Sophia stayed where she was, staring ahead. We guess it was stage fright.

“This is not the time to act like a zombie!” Johnny whispered. “Go on!”

Cinderella was getting impatient. “I WISH I could go to the ball!” she repeated loudly.

Sophia stepped onstage with an assisting push from Pete. “I....uh....”

“You will have your wish,” prompted Evelyn in a whisper.

“Oh, yeah. You will have your wish and you will go to the ball and...and....” She waved the battery-powered flashing wand.

Anna Rose shut off the main lights and flashed some pink ones while Cinderella dashed offstage, changed into her princess gown, and ran back on. The lights went back to normal.

“But, how will I get to the ball?” Cinderella asked.

The fairy godmother waved her wand again, and the horses trotted onstage, pulling the carriage. Cinderella carefully climbed inside, and the horses pulled her away, while the fairy godmother called out, “Go, follow your dreams!”

“End of Act Two!” Johnny announced.
 
This is epic; and "Mess it up and clean it again" reminds me of my "dirty" secret from the Navy. When I was a submarine crewman, our C.O. demanded ENDLESS cleanups of spaces which WERE NOT dirty at all, wasting time which could have been spent on something productive. Since the cleanups were mandatory, I devised a method to "look busy." I collected a supply of dust and lint and saved it; at each cleanup time, I scattered this dirt onto the deck in my assigned area, took my time sweeping it all up, then saved the same dirt for next time.
 
Copperfox said:
This is epic; and "Mess it up and clean it again" reminds me of my "dirty" secret from the Navy. When I was a submarine crewman, our C.O. demanded ENDLESS cleanups of spaces which WERE NOT dirty at all, wasting time which could have been spent on something productive. Since the cleanups were mandatory, I devised a method to "look busy." I collected a supply of dust and lint and saved it; at each cleanup time, I scattered this dirt onto the deck in my assigned area, took my time sweeping it all up, then saved the same dirt for next time.
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Really? That's hilarious! :D

And I agree with Zella, that act did go fairy well. ;)

On Sunday, some friends came over to our house. The boy, who is about eight years old, made some comment about something being "dislegal", and it made me think of Henry. :p
 
Act Three opened at the ball. The King, Queen, and Prince sat in thrones, flanked by the royal guards. The other princesses and the step-trio were grouped off in a corner.

“So, see anybody you like yet?” asked the King.

“Hey, I need a little time!” replied the Prince. “This is kind of a life-changinhg decision, you know? It’s not like picking out a new horse!”

“As long as the girl you choose is suitable, we won’t interfere,” said the Queen.

At this point, Cinderella entered the scene. The Queen elbowed the Prince. “What about that one?”

The Prince rose from his seat and walked over to Cinderella, looking like he was in a trance (this was because Ben was so bored). Instead of the carefully prepared lines in the script, all he said was, “Uh, you. Want to dance?”

Cinderella nodded, and they began the waltz. It sure wasn’t like any waltzing we’d seen before, but the parents seemed to love it. There was tons of applause, and lots of ‘sooo cute’ comments.

When that was over, Evelyn activated the sound effects, and the clock struck twelve. Cinderella looked appropriately startled and dashed off. She forgot to drop the slipper, so Johnny pitched it onstage.

“No, come back,” said the Prince in the most un-desperate tones possible.

“Guards! After her!” shouted the King.

The guards, who had been waiting for their big moment, rushed off with the swords drawn.

“Whoa, why are they waving their swords?” Rory whispered. “She’s not wanted dead or alive!”

“Why chase her?” said the Queen distinctly before the curtain dropped. “She looks ugly. I told those kids I would make a way better Cinderella that Maggie.”

Maggie’s three older siblings, who were in the front row, scowled menacingly. Privately, we hoped Olivia would get what was coming to her after the show.
Act Four opened with Cinderella scrubbing the floor as the step-trio discussed the ball.

“That strange girl’s dress was like so sweet!” One said. “I want one, Mother!”

“Well, I want to know who she was,” said Two. “How could we not have recognized her? I thought we knew everyone worth knowing around here.”

There was a knock on the door, and the footman entered with a letter, which he handed to the stepmother before running offstage.

“Oh, girls, listen!” said the stepmother. “The prince still hasn’t found that young lady, and he’s visiting all the homes in the kingdom looking for her! It seems the only clue to her identity is the slipper that fell from her foot as she ran off.”

“So, you’re saying he’s going to marry the person who the shoe fits?” said Two.

“Oh, it’s SO gonna be me,” said One.

“Uh, yeah, like in your dreams,” said Two.

“Now, girls,” said the stepmother. “Enough. It doesn’t matter which one of you it is, as long as it IS one.”

The footman poked his head onstage. “Uh, the prince is here.”
 
I particularly liked the "un-desperate tones," and the common-sense interjection that the soldiers ought not threaten bodily harm to Cinderella!
 
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