The Adventures of Pete and the Pals


Cinderella nodded, and they began the waltz. It sure wasn’t like any waltzing we’d seen before, but the parents seemed to love it. There was tons of applause, and lots of ‘sooo cute’ comments.

:D I can totally envision it. Very realistic. ;)
 
The stepmother rushed to the door. “Get ready, girls. Cinderella, beat it.”

The stepsisters did a quick game of ‘Rock, Paper, Scissors’ to determine who would try on the slipper first. Two won, so she stepped forward as the prince, the footman, and the guards entered. The prince glanced at the stepsisters, then shook his head.

“Come on, let’s go. The girl at the ball looked totally different.”

One of the guards shrugged. “It says on the proclamation you’ll test the shoe size of every girl.”

“That proclamation has too many legal loopholes,” another guard muttered. “You need to fire the court lawyer.”

“Um, I’m waiting here,” said Two, waving her foot at the prince. He stuck out his hand, and the footman gave him one of those foot-measurers they use in shoe stores.

“Hey, don’t I get to try on the shoe?” Two whined.

“Forget it,” said the prince. “We’re not spreading foot diseases. We’re doing it the clean way. You don’t try it on unless you’re within a certain measurement range.”

He measured her foot. “Nope, too big. Any other girls around here?”

One knocked Two aside and sat down. “Uh, I have this rare condition where my feet get bigger and smaller, so...”

“Lying to royalty is against the law,” one of the guards commented.

One shot him an evil glare.

“No, yours is too big, too,” said the prince. “Any other girls left?”

“No,” said the stepmother.

Just then, Cinderella walked in.

“As I just said, lying to royalty is aginst the law,” the guard said.

“Cinderella! I told you to beat it!” the stepmother said angrily.

“Conspiring to disobey proclamations is aginst the law, too,” said the guard. “That young lady needs to be measured.”

The step-trio leaped in front of Cinderella.

“What girl?” One giggled nervously.

“That was our family ghost,” Two said. “She’s been haunting the place since 1156.”

“Guards,” said the prince. “Looks like you finally get to arrest somebody. But first, let me measure that girl, because she’s the one I danced with last night.”

“Be careful with that shoe,” the footman said. “According to the proclamation, she needs to try the shoe on before you can marry her.”

“I didn’t see that in the proclamation,” said the prince.

“It was in the fine print,” the footman explained.

“I thought that was a decoration!” the prince fumed. “My lawyer is so dead!”

“So, what if the shoe breaks?” asked the stepmother.

“It won’t,” said the footman.

The stepmother reached backstage and pulled out a (rubber) sledgehammer. “What if I break it?”

“Do you really want to know that?” said the footman ominously.

“Uh...never mind.” the stepmother tossed the hammer away.

Without further discussion, the prince shoved the shoe onto Cinderella’s foot. “Yep. It fits. Come on, let’s get married. Guards, take out the garbage.”

“It’s not garbage day...ooooooh,” said one guard.

“You know, I think I’ll share my new wealth with them,” said Cinderella generously.

“Okay,” said the prince. “They can use it to hire a lawyer. They’ll need one.”

“And so,” Johnny narrated as the guards ushered the step-trio offstage, “Cinderella became a princess. I apologize in advance for this blatantly obvious statement—she kept being herself! The step-trio stopped being so nasty—turns out all they needed was a little counseling (and a little jail time, but that’s beside the point)!”

“You mean I ripped up all Cinderella’s personal belongings and whacked her with a mop because my self-esteem was compromised?” Two gasped from the wing. “OMG, that explains so much!”

The curtains fell to thunderous applause. The kids all filed onstage for bows, and we starting packing up.

“Hey, you don’t get to keep that!” Sally said sharply as Olivia snuck off with her costumes rolled up under her arm.

“It doesn’t fit you,” Olivia sulked.

“It’s part of a cherished childhood memory,” said Sally, snatching it back. “Anyway, we might need it for another play.”

Johnny dropped the stack of capes he was carrying. “No! No more plays! Ever!”

“Somebody get the hammer,” said Pete. As Rory reached for it, Aiden dashed by, chasing Rohan. Aiden tripped on the hammer and crashed into the stack of boxes, which crashed into the carriage. We watched, frozen with horror, as it rolled toward the backstage stairs.
 
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The legal-loopholes bit, the foot-diseases bit, the stepmother being intimidated out of breaking the glass slipper, and the self-esteem excuse, were all amusing, in your tradition of humor that rings true.
 
“You mean I ripped up all Cinderella’s personal belongings and whacked her with a mop because my self-esteem was compromised?” Two gasped from the wing. “OMG, that explains so much!”

:D I laughed out loud at that. As Copperfox said, your humor rings true. ;)

Ooohhh dear. o.O The carriage!
 
We watched, frozen with horror, as it rolled toward the backstage stairs. Johnny lunged for it too late. There was a sickening crunch. We stared at each other, afraid to look.

“We’re gonna DIE!” Tim gasped.

Cullen pulled out his phone. “Can I call the hospital now?”

Johnny glared. “We don’t a doctor, we need an undertaker and some cheap cemetery plots!”

Cullen looked confused. “Is that still 911?”

“Whatever!” said Johnny, rushing over to the stairs and staring down them for a couple seconds. He turned to the rest of us. “So, I’ve got good news and bad news.”

“Well?” said Pete. “What?”

“The good news is, all four wheels are still attached to the axles. The bad news...well....the axles aren’t exactly still attached to the rest of the thing. And the door’s smashed off. And the handle’s twisted. And the side’s banged in. And the paint’s scratched up. And...”

Pete winced. “Okay, we get the picture.”

Rory joined Johnny. “Whoa, it’s all over the place! If this was a human, it would have to be like one of the goriest accidents of all time!”

“So, what’re we gonna do?” Teddy asked.

“Anything that puts the blame on someone else,” said Johnny.

“Well, it WAS Aiden’s fault,” Teddy pointed out.

“Technically, we took responsibility for the carriage when we borrowed it,” said Henry. “I wonder how much it’ll cost to replace it.”

“More than we have, or will have in the near future,” Pete guessed.

“Well, I say...” Johnny was interrupted by Cullen yanking on his arm.

“What?” Johnny asked impatiently.

“Uh...I did what you said.”

“What did I say?”

“To call 911.”
 
“WHAT?” we chorused after a second of shocked silence.

“I did not!” Johnny added.

“I asked if I should, and you said ‘Whatever’!”

“What did you tell the guy who answered?” Tim asked.

Cullen looked scared. “Nothing. I...I didn’t know what to say, so I hung up. Then my phone started ringing, so I threw it in down there with the drums and stuff.”

“The orchestra pit?” Pete said. “Great! Now everyone’ll come—the fire department, the police, the paramedics...You NEVER hang up on 911!”

“Am I gonna get arrested?” gulped Cullen.

Maybe not,” said Johnny darkly.

“But in my Curious George book, it said you go to jail if you fool the fire department!”

Henry rolled his eyes. “No, you won’t get arrested. You will get in trouble, though.”

“He told me to!” Cullen protested. “It’s his fault!”

This discussion was brought to an end by the arrival of the abovementioned emergency responders. What followed was long, embarrassing, and does not need to be gone into in detail. Let’s just say that Cullen learned it was a bad idea to call 911 about broken carriages and then hang up.

After that fiasco was sorted out, we carted the remains of the carriage up the stairs and waited for Pete’s dad to pick us up.

“So, what are we gonna tell the guy who let us borrow the carriage?” Rory asked.

“The truth,” Henry said firmly.

“We’ll end up spending the rst of the summer working to pay for it,” Teddy pointed out.

“Maybe we can get a loan,” Johnny said hopefully.

“From who?” asked Tim.

“Uh...Irene?” Johnny suggested. “Isn’t she loaded with cash?”

“She needs it for college expenses,” said Tim.

Just then, Pete’s dad arrived, and we loaded up the car and went home for some well-deserved rest. The next morning, we Pals met in Pete’s room to discuss our dilemma.

“Where’s Tim?” Pete asked.

Johny shrugged. “I don’t know, but I bet Amy has something to do with it.”

Tim burst into the room, waving what appeared to be a handful of cash. Johnny made a grab for it. “Wow, where’d you get that?”

Tim jerked it out of Johnny’s reach. “You’ll never guess!”

“Amy?” said Teddy.

“No—Irene agreed to the loan!”

Henry was suspicious. “Why?”

“I asked her at a good time,” Tim explained. “She just handed in her two-week notice to Happy Angels.”

“You’d think that would be a bad time,” said Pete. “I mean, that job IS her only source of income.”

“She got a new job, doing some art thing at the college,” said Tim.

“How much cash is that, anyway?” asked Teddy.

“A hundred and fifty dollars! Let’s go confront the carriage guy.”

We did. Turns out we had to dip into our meager treasury funds to cover the extra twenty dollars. The guy claimed he was giving us a break, too. (We still have our suspicions as to that.)

“For the rest of the summer, I’m not gonna do anything but rest,” Johnny declared, sinking into a chair in the rec room.

“Yeah, we’d better enjoy what peaceful time we’ve got left,” said Pete. “You know what happens in ten days?”

“Uh...school starts?” said Rory.

“No, worse. Arch’s family is coming back from Hawaii!”

Rory voiced our mutual thought. “That means—Spiker revenge!”
 
8. Just...Stuff

In view of what was probably going to happen upon VidKid’s return, we were determined to spend the next ten days enjoying ourselves as much as possible. We decided to have a sleepover at Pete’s apartment, since he had all the good stuff like a Wii, Xbox, etc.

“Rory, start popping some popcorn,” Pete said as the rest of us unrolled our sleeping bags on the living room floor. “It’s in the far right cupboard.”

“So, what movie are we gonna watch?” asked Teddy.

“I have a suggestion!” Johnny said. “How about Invasion of the Bodysnatchers?”

“What’s that?” asked Pete. “Sounds like a 1950's sci-fi movie.”

“It is,” Johnny explained.

“Is it one of those cheesy ones where the zipper of the alien suit is plainly showing?” asked Pete.

“No, it’s creepy,” Johnny promised.

On this recommendation, we decided to watch it. Turns out that Invasion of the Bodysnatchers is not the best thing to watch at a sleepover.

“Hey, I’m not going to sleep after that,” said Teddy. “What if those alien pod people are around here? They’ll suck out all my personality while I sleep!”

“For your information, that was just a sci-fi movie, and, by definition, FICTIONAL,” Henry pointed out.

“Yeah, well, I say we watch something else,” Teddy insisted. “Something non-disturbing, like Deadliest Sports Bloopers.”

“How about...” Johnny sifted through the pile of DVD’s. “Obliterated? That’s this TV show that creates in-depth reconstructions of the world’s greatest disasters.”

“Okay,” said Pete. “Sounds interesting.”

It sure was. The episode Johnny put in was entitled ‘Inferno’, and was about the exploding of the Hindenburg. Of course, Henry already knew all about that. We practically had to sit on him to shut him up.

“It’s way more interesting to see it on the show than to hear it from you,” Johnny pointed out as the hosts of the show ignited some hydrogen to demostrate how flammable it was. (He nearly went up in the ensuing flames. So, yeah, it was flammable.)

After that, Henry stayed quiet, but he kept a careful eye on the hosts of the show to be sure they weren’t making any historical mistakes.

“So, does the history professor pass or fail them?” Johnny asked Henry as the credits rolled.

“For a sensational show, they did pretty well,” Henry admitted. “If you’re so into documentaries now, can we watch some court ones?”

“Time for bed, boys!” called Pete’s mom from the other room.

“Can’t we play at least one game on the Wii first?” Pete asked.

“All right—one,” she replied.

Since there were only four remotes, Teddy and Rory traded turns with Pete and Tim for Wii bowling. Pete’s team ended up winning, since he got the most practice owning it and all. Then we turned off all electronics, including the lights, and got into our sleeping bags.
 

“Now we tell ghost stories,” said Johnny. “I’ll go first. Okay...once there was this guy. He was medium height, black hair, tan colored skin, and blue eyes. He was looking for a house. While browsing buyhousesnow.com, he came across one that had all the stuff he was looking for—including an inground pool and a fully-furnished basement rec room. It was going for a crazy cheap price, so he figured it was spoken for already. But he thought he might as well try, so he called up the owner.”

“Hang on,” Henry interrupted. “Don’t you mean the realtor?”

“No, this guy was selling the house himself,” Johnny explained. “Seems no realtor would take it on. You’ll see why later. Anyway, he went to go check out the house. It was a big one with a brown roof, a creamish off-white paint job, and dark green shutters. When he got there he was surprised to see a guy violently ejected out the front door. The main character guy thought maybe he’d tripped on a step. So he went ahead and bought the place, had an unspecified beverage to celebrate, and went to bed.”

“Is that the end?” demanded Rory. “Where’s the ghosts and hauntings?”

“I’m getting to that,” said Johnny. “So, the main character guy---his name was Rod, by the way---lived in the house for about a year, and everything was nice and peaceful. Then he started to think the place was too big for just him, and he decided to rent out the second floor, so he put an ad in the local paper. It said: “Tenant wanted. Second floor apartment. Large and roomy. Owner requests only quiet people need inquire.” After rejecting a few people who ignored the last line and inquired anyway, Rod finally rented it to a serious professor guy who taught a course called ‘Myths: Why All Paranormal Activity is a Hoax’ at the local college.”

“Is this going anywhere?” Teddy interrupted.

Johnny answered this with a look and continued. “After a couple days, Rod was woken up in the middle of the night by a banging upstairs. He went to investigate and found the college professor doing a remarkably good imitation of a screaming girl. Of course, Rod demanded to know what he thought he was doing shrieking and knocking things around at two in the morning. The college professor just gasped out a garbled sentence, grabbed his stuff, and bolted. Rod was a little disturbed, but decided that the college professor had probably had a sudden nervous breakdown due to overwork and put another ad in the paper. This same pattern went on for a few weeks, with a different tenant each time. Rod, who was shocked at the large number of sudden nervous breakdowns, thought maybe it was due to air pollution and decided to take a vacation. He made reservations for a nice cruise to the Bahamas and packed his bags. The morning of his flight, however, he couldn’t find his suitcases anywhere. As he went to open the door to see if maybe he’d left them outside, he was surprised to find the door wouldn’t open. He tried every door and window in the place, but they were all locked.

“After a couple days, Rod’s boss got mad that he hadn’t shown up for the past couple days and went over to his house to personally fire him, complete with a lecture. To his surprise, a total stranger opened the door. He was a tall guy with brown hair, peachish skin, and dark green eyes. He informed the boss that Rod didn’t live there anymore. The boss shrugged philosophically and turned to go. As he did, he noticed the house had a new paint job---a black roof, a tan paint job, and blue shutters. The End.”

It took a couple minutes for this to sink in.

“You mean Rod got turned into a house and the house got turned into a guy?” Rory demanded. “That’s weird!”

“It’s a ghost story,” said Pete. “It’s supposed to be weird.”
 
It's weird, all right, the more so for the "unspecified beverage" in the middle of it; but you did manage to make what could have been just one more conventional doom-story into a surprise ending. Congratulations; and try not to keep us waiting so long for the next "Pete" installment. :)
 
“No more ghost stories,” Teddy demanded.

“Ooh, just one more!” said Johnny. “I just got this great idea…”

“Boys, time for bed,” called Pete’s mom.

This put an end to the prospective fight, and we eventually fell asleep. The next morning, Pete’s mom greeted us with a breakfast of Fruity Rounds.

“Boy, Pete, you sure have it good,” mumbled Rory around a mouthful.

“She just bought it as a treat,” Pete explained. “I don’t eat like this every morning.”

After we ate, we began a War Tournament. Not with weapons or anything---the card game War. After several interesting rounds, it was down to Pete and Johnny.

“I’m going to win,” Johnny said as Henry dealt the cards.

“How can we be sure of that?” Rory asked skeptically.

“What does your heart tell you?” Johnny replied.

There was a pause.

“Did all those ‘follow your heart’ posters at Happy Angels mess up your mind or something?” said Rory.

“No, it’s a Lord of the Rings quote,” Johnny explained. “And I AM going to win. In fact, I bet the Ultimate Embarrassment that I will.”

“Nooo!” shouted the other McGillis boys.

“What does he mean?” Tim asked. “What’s the Ultimate Embarrassment?”

“Old home videos of us as dumb little kids,” said Rory. “You and Pete get to watch them if Johnny loses. He better win.”

It all came down to a final war. Johnny triumphantly put down a king.

“You can still take it back,” Pete said before lifting his card.

“Never!” said Johnny.

The other McGillises closed their eyes in horror as Pete revealed his card---an ace.

“You had no right to make such a stupid bet, Jonathan McGillis!” Rory yelled. “You should have taken it back while you had the chance!”

“A man’s bet is his honor,” said Johnny grandly.

“Is that a movie quote?” said Tim.

“No, it’s from the book I’m writing---Outer Battles Epic: Space Skis.”

This sounded so weird, we didn’t ask. Johnny led the way to the McGillis family apartment, where he proceeded to pull a large box out of the storage closet.

“There’s this one DVD Dad made with all the…highlights…from the old VCR tapes,” he said. “Oh, here it is.”

The first scene was of a little blond-haired baby sitting surrounded by pillows. “July 3rd,” announced the voice of Mrs. McGillis. “Sally can sit up now!”

Baby Sally grinned at the camera.

“You should have seen all the tapes we had of just Sally,” said Johnny. “You would not believe it. ‘Sally, one day old. Sally, one day and one hour old. Sally, one day and two hours old.’ You would think all Mom did til I was born was walk around with a video camera and tape Sally. Come on, let’s skip to where most of us are at least born.”

Henry, who had control of the remote, obeyed. The disembodied voice of Mrs. McGillis was heard again. “August 12th. Sally starts school next month! I can’t believe it! Sally, are you excited?”

Five-year-old Sally looked up from her coloring book and nodded. Four-year-old Johnny jumped in front of the camera. “Hey, Mommy! Lookit me! I can do a flip right off the table!”

Even at five, Sally had her older-sister look. “Johnny, Mommy was filming me.”

There was a wailing noise in the background (probably baby Teddy), and the camera was shut off. The next scene was four-year-old Johnny standing on a stool in front of a group of people.

“Relatives,” Henry explained. “Grandma’s annual Christmas party.”

“Now, Johnny,” said a woman in a festive red and green dress. “Can you recite your poem for us?”

“It’s too embarrassing!” Sally whispered. “Don’t make him do it, Aunt Linda!”

Aunt Linda looked determined. “You want to do it, don’t you, Johnny?”

“Sure,” said Johnny. “She said she’d give me a glass of Coca-Cola if I did, Sal.”

“Quiet, everyone!” announced Aunt Linda. “Little Jonathan here has a poem he wants to recite.”

Johnny began, saying it too fast and with pauses for breath in the wrong places.

“I’m standing in the corner, my mom is mad at me…”

Real-life Johnny snatched the remote from Henry. “Okay, that’s enough of that.”

The scene changed to one of four-year-old Henry reading a Science for Kids chapter book.

“March 8th. Henry, say how old you are.”

Henry glanced up. “Four.”

“And what are you reading?”

“About the five senses. This book says when you breathe, molecules of what you’re smelling go up your nose. You think if you smelled a cake long enough, it would disappear?”

Five-year-old Johnny burst in front of the camera and held up a purple action figure. “Mom, look! It’s Gadzo Zippin!”

“That’s Captain Purple,” Henry corrected him.

“Uh-uh! In my story, he’s Gadzo Zippin.”

“It said on the box his name was Captain Purple,” Henry said.

“Boys,” was all Mrs. McGillis said before remembering to turn off the camera.

“This is boring,” Teddy said. “Let’s skip to later.”

“Yeah, something when we’re older,” said Teddy.

Rory grabbed the remote. “Okay…I think chapter 14 has you in it.”

Chapter 14 was obviously the McGillises getting ready for another school year. They had evidently been told what to say beforehand---their name, age, and upcoming grade. It started with Teddy. “I’m Teddy, and I’m five, and I’m going to kindergarten.”

“Why is it called kindergarten?” Rory asked. “There’s no gardens there.”

“It’s from a German word,” Henry explained.

“Your turn, Rory,” prompted Mrs. McGillis.

Rory looked bored. “I’m Rory, I’m six, and I’m going to first grade.”

Henry looked eager for school to start. “I’m Henry. I’m seven, and I’m going into the third grade, but not the same one as Johnny.”

“Yeah, you’re going to the nerd class,” muttered eight-year-old Johnny.

Mrs. McGillis and Sally gasped.

“Jonathan! Where did you learn that word?” his mother demanded. “Sally, shut off the camera. Your brother needs…”

“That looked like it could have been interesting,” said Tim. “Too bad she turned it off.”

“Where did you learn that word, anyway?” asked Pete.

Johnny shrugged. “That was in the distant past. How am I supposed to remember?”
 
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Thanks for not keeping me waiting!! :D You still have that excellent Bill Cosby-like sense for showing the humor in realistic situations. My favorite line in this installment was the one about smelling a cake long enough.
 
I have never before heard a ghost story quite like that. :D

The 'follow your heart' dialogue is fantastic, and I love the home video stuff. xP So realistic... My family has a tape filled with stuff about my older sister, which is just like the "Sally can sit up now!" scenario you so deftly illustrated. :D And the whole "lookit me, I can do a flip off the table!" sounds just like my little brother! Reading that makes me want to dig out some old home videos!

This is rather random, but just today I was telling my mom that I always thought it was kinder-garden. My kindergarten brain quest deck featured a panda character, and the image in my head of "kindergarten" was always that panda gardening rows of cabbages. o.O
 
My family has a tape filled with stuff about my older sister, which is just like the "Sally can sit up now!" scenario you so deftly illustrated. :D

Yeah, I'm the oldest, so our family has a whole tape of me as a baby...:D


The next scene was in a car.

“We were at a campground,” Johnny explained. “Mom and Dad went in the office to check in.”

Nine-year-old Johnny grinned at the camera. “Hi, Rory!”

“Dad won’t like it if you break the video camera,” the muffled voice of Sally said offscreen. “And don’t you dare point that at me.”

The camera immediately swung to the left, only for a Nancy Drew book to crash into the lens.

“Who’s breaking the camera now?” Johnny said. “Hey, Rory, film me using the OnSpot car phone.”

He pressed a gold button on the dashboard, and a female voice said, “Welcome to OnSpot! Number, please.”

“Two,” said Johnny.

“Eight,” said the female voice.

“No, two!”

“Eight,” the OnSpot insisted.

“Junk,” Johnny muttered.

“Pardon?” asked the voice politely.

“Junk,” Johnny repeated amongst stifled giggling from the back.

“Louder, please,” said the voice.

Johnny obliged. “JUNK!”

The voice recording was not impressed. “Pound.”

“I’ll pound you all right,” said Johnny.

“Hit it with my shoe!” Rory piped up.

“They’re coming! They’re coming! They’re coming!” Teddy yelled.

“Turn it off!” Sally called.

The camera swung around, and we could see a hand reaching for it. The scene switched abruptly to the inside of an airport. The five older McGillis kids were grouped together in a row of seats, with a posterboard sign leaning against Sally’s feet.

“This is a big day for the McGillis family!” said the voice of Aunt Linda, sounding like she was trying to be dramatic. “This is the day Mommy and Daddy bring home your new baby sister!”

Sally briefly held up the sign, which read, “Welcome Home, Lauren!”

“Teddy, how do you feel, now that you’re not the baby any more?”

“None of your business,” muttered Teddy, who was scowling.

“But…oooooh, they’re here! Hold up the sign!”

Sally shoved it into Henry’s hands. “Take it! I want to hold the baby.”

“I hope they forgot the baby on the plane,” grumbled Teddy, still scowling.

The camera zoomed up and focused on the McGillises’ parents. Mrs. McGillis held Lauri, who was about four or five months old. You couldn’t see much of her, since she was in this baby sling thing. There were a lot of hugs, and a lot of Sally saying, “She’s SO CUTE!”

Then the camera swung around to show a large group of people rushing towards them.

“Linda, you know what I said about not having a crowd here to greet us,” Mrs. McGillis. “Lauri…”

“Oh, Marian, did you get that from that one doctor’s book? Frank says that’s nonsense, said Aunt Linda. “And it’s not a crowd. It’s just some ladies I know…”

The crowd arrived, and Aunt Linda obviously forgot about the camera, because she let it dangle from her wrist and film everyone’s feet.

“Sweet! I remember those Nikes!” said present-time Johnny. “They were the best!”

“Ooh, how cute!” boomed a woman’s voice. “Did you teach her English yet, or does she still speak Ethiopian?”

“You mean Lauri?” said Sally. “She speaks baby babble. She’s only five months old!”

The camera was now bouncing all over the place and making us carsick, only without the car. Fortunately, it was turned off by someone, and the scene changed to the five older McGillis kids in the hall of their old house.

“Say good-bye!” came the voice of Mrs. McGillis.

“Shouldn’t we film the whole house so we can show it to Lauri when she gets older?” said Teddy.

The sound of a crying baby caused Mrs. McGillis to put the camera down and walk away, with instructions for everyone to stay put til she got back.

“I can’t til next week when they start selling Valentine candy in the store,” Rory said.

“Yeah, candy hearts are the best!” Teddy said. “Except for the lovey sayings.”

“I never read those,” Rory said. “They’d make me too sick to enjoy the candy.”

“So…I’ve been thinking,” said Johnny. “Why have all those hearts representing love? I mean, a muscle that pumps blood! Soooo romantic---not! Why you think about it, those Valentine symbols are just insects, internal organs, and vegetation Why not a mosquito instead of a butterfly, a liver instead of a heart, and a venus flytrap instead of rose?”
 
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Is OnSpot an alias for OnStar?

As for the heart, it is true that too much has been made of "the heart," metaphorically, in opposition to "the head." In reality, the emotions AND the power of reasoning are both parts of ONE combined thing, the consciousness. Though unfortunately, the emotions in most people own an overwhelming majority of stock shares in the corporation.
 
I absolutely bellowed with laughter over "OnSpot". My dad has OnStar in his truck, and I have many fond memories of hollering things at it when it couldn't understand us. Once, when Mom was driving and was trying to call dad, she kept repeating "two", and it couldn't understand her. I then pronounced it phonetically and... the machine understood what I was saying. :eek: It was possessed.
 
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