Foreward: This editorial is based on the book: The Voyage of the Dawn Treader; and includes story points from that book. -Paul Martin
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I remember pretty well what I used to be like as a teenager. With my parents being very busy and having little time for me I turned into a pretty independent person very early on. Most of the time I was on my own and therefore I had things go my way. I liked to make my own decisions. Now imagine my mom coming and telling me what I should do and what not. Boy, I could give her a hard time about it and be sulky and grumpy all day long. Which of course not only spoiled her day but mine also. But it was all her fault and not mine, at least from my perspective.
I’m a couple years older now and you should think I have grown out of that kind of behaviour. But I haven’t. Most my friends think I’m a smart girl and I got some wisdom in me. But sometimes I’m just a little girl still. Last year in January I had meant to go skiing with my best friend. We had everything booked and the bill was paid and we were both looking forward to it like none other. Two days before we would have left for our vacation my friend got sick with the flu and we had to cancel everything. It is understandable that one would be disappointed then. But I could convince myself perfectly that it was all my friend’s fault and that of course things had to come this way. I wanted to hate my friend and there was no way I wanted to see that it’s no one’s fault that he got sick and that it was best to stay home. I cried about it like a little girl, because my vacation got spoiled, and the whole world was bad to me.
Well, I don’t know if I’m an exception with that kind of behaviour. But there’s at least one other person, who has that same problem. He has the art of denial perfected and knows just too well how to give other people a hard time about not enjoying himself while there’s only himself to blame. Lucy and Edmund’s cousin Eustace. From the first minute on that he spends in Narnia it is all Lucy and Edmund’s fault that he is even there. Eustace is a perfectly reasonable boy. He knows everything about state of the art ships, he knows what is healthy to eat and he knows that the British consulate is the place to go when his rights are violated in a foreign country. And above all things Eustace detests people who cannot see the facts for what they are, performing animals and all sorts of adventures and tales. So what else would you expect other than him denying having his very own adventure born out of magic. Do you see the irony? One moment we fret about other people and the circumstances we are in not being what we expect them to be and at the same time we are in absolute denial of the facts ourselves.
I often catch myself in situations like that. I can even watch myself acting all silly and childish. But it might just hurt my pride if I admitted that the person I’m arguing with is right, and it’s easier to be upset then than to have a good laugh at myself.
I’ve often hurt people’s feelings that way and left them entirely clueless about just why I am even upset. The sad thing is that I am fully aware of me doing that. And when I’ve realized often enough, how much my selfish pride can hurt instead of bringing me any gain, all that is left for me to do is fall down on my knees. It is then that I would like to unzip my skin and leave it behind and be someone new.
Eustace goes through very much the same experience. Things have to turn really bad first, though. He needs a real eye opener before he actually realizes what a beast he is on the inside. He turns into a dragon as a reflection of his inner being. Only at this point Eustace cannot remain in denial any longer. All this time he was able to conceal the beast inside and it felt quite comfortable. But being bared like that he hardly dares show himself to his friends. His condition pains him so much that he doesn’t know how to help himself other than finally starting to be of use. He simply has to take who he is and make the best of it. It is not before this point of painful realization of his own nature and his willingness to be no foe anymore that he is in fact offered to strip off the old self.
And even then he is unable to do it himself. He peels of his dragon scales several times only to find that underneath he is still a dragon. It takes Aslan’s assistance to bring out the boy inside the dragon.
This point in The Voyage of the Dawn Treader touches me deeply. It is this metamorphosis that I often long for, that I think everyone longs for every now and then. We simply want to come undone and be made new, but no matter how hard we try we cannot accomplish it on our own. We have to ask God to do that for us, to turn us into who he wants us to be.
I’ve never gone through a literal metamorphosis like Eustace. But like him I’ve been dipped in a pool of water and came up as a new person. And every once in a while I get some of my old skin stripped off when I’ve grown out of it.
More often than not growing is a painful process and your skin itches and stings terribly when it gets too tight on you. But it is a grace, too. We never have to be anyone else than who we want to be and we can be comfortable for quite some time. But if we wish to be greater than we’ve let ourselves be, then we have a faithful helper who we can rely on to open the zipper like a father helps his kid to take off its coat.
