Attention-Deficit Roleplaying

Mr. Freeman than pulled out his cell-phone to call his agent. First he had an awesome diea for a movie to pitch to a studio based on his experience. Second, he had to have his agent notify Peter Jackson that he would be a little late to work that day. But since the Vogons had been slated to destroy the Earth that day, and MR .Freeman had just saved the Earth, PJ was fine with him being late. After all, it's had for any one to see his movies if the world is blown up.
 
A group of disarmament activists heard that Mr. Freeman had successfully used poetry to defeat enemies of mankind; so they began a campaign to "ban assault poetry." When Mr. Freeman tried to explain that it was VOGON poetry which deserved this peculiar description, they replied, "That doesn't matter! Don't you realize that it's only GOOD people who need to be disarmed to guarantee peace on Earth?"
 
In the end the ban went through as a majority of Americans didn't care about poetry. However this ban meant that any book containing poetry was banned, icnluding The Hobbit, LOTR, and even Narnia ( even though the prophesy that Mr. Beaver shared didn't even rhyme.) In the end all that was left of "poetry" was cheesey pop songs, that were confiscated to use for torture purposes. The only book left was Twilight, anything approved by Oprah's book club, Harlequin Romance Novels, Copies of The Worst Christian Romance Novel Ever by Copperfox, and a copy of TV guide. The last one was desrtoyed however when someone scribbled a lymeric over Rosie O'Donnell's face.

And that was how the Book Burners from Fahrenheit 451 began.
 
When Copperfox saw the above post, it reminded him that he wanted eventually to make a full-length humorous book out of his old romance parody. This would have to wait, though, until he figured out how to resolve his rambling "Emmett and Queenie" story.
 
In a desperate attempt to save all literature, Dr .Who quickly jumped in his Tardis and foiled the abduction of Martin Freeman by the dwarves in the First Place and drove him to work that day thereby changing the course of future events.
 
No sooner did Stark return from defeating the Vogons then he found himself and Batman forced to team up with Green Arrow, Blue Beetle, and other indepentently wealthy super heroes to face a new threat... CAPTAIN PLANET. The man with the Ugly Green Mullet had declared a one man war against Stark Industries, Wayne Enterprises, Queen Industries, Kord Industries and every other vast multi-national buisness corperation owned by a billionare industralist since all of Captain Planets enemies were billionare industrailists.
 
Captain Planet proved easy to defeat after all. They just had to show him proof that his own cartoon series was produced and promoted by another wealthy tycoon, and he fell down dead from embarrassment.

As soon as all the thirteen-year-old would-be princesses heard about this, they all mounted their horses that their parents had paid for, and started riding around on meaningless private quests, hoping once again to make the roleplay be about THEM.
 
Except for the Balrog who had been up late with a bout of indigestion and none of the Orcs bother to purchase any antacids.
 
So Doctor Who visited the 1950's, and brought forward the TV character of Speedy, the Alka-Seltzer avatar, who cured the Balrog's acid reflux.
 
To show his thanks, the Balrog ate the Doctor and Speedy, only to realize that his stomach didn't enjoy that. He then sat moaning for days, complaining to his goblin minions about his aching stomach.
 
At the same moment that the Balrog was trying to get over his stomach ache, a weatherman was in a New York news studio giving all the wrong predictions for the weather. He was under a lot of stress because right after he finished reporting, an angry mob showed up to tell him just how much they hated his forecasts.
 
Fortunately for the weatherman, a forecast of his WAS right for once. He had predicted freezing rain; the hostile mob, assuming this to be wrong, had come out expecting unseasonably sunny weather; and when freezing rain coated the pavement, the members of the angry mob went slipping and falling all over the place. The weatherman escaped, and went into a new career working for a phone-in psychic service.
 
At this time, Steven Spielberg was thinking he wanted to make another movie, but he didn't know what he wanted to make. He'd already done a dinosaur thriller, a sci-fi feel good movie, and a story about a boy and his horse. (If you can figure these movies out, you win bonus points.) He wanted to do somthing that he had never done before, but he couldn't make up his mind.
 
He decided to do a bio-pic on the Balrog that ate the 13 teenaged- wannabe pricnesses. Since Peter Jackson had experience working with Balrogs they agreed to colaborate on the endeavor .The Balrog was very ahppy to ahve his story brought to the big screen.

For too long he had been mistaken for his brother who had chased the Fellowship in Moria. Now, people knew who he was and loved him, including his girlfriend.

He was so in love with his girl friend that he went on Ophah, jumped on the couch, declared how much he lvoed his girlfriend, and then ate Oprah Winfrey.
 
At least among men, who were glad that they no longer had to suffer through Oprah. Women however, found a strange sensation. Liberation. No longer were they tied to the chain of Empress Oprah, but they could now think for themselves. They consulted their own doctors on health needs, picked out their own clothes, and their book clubs had to decide for themselves which books to read.
 
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