Attention-Deficit Roleplaying

Meanwhile, executives at the SyFy channel decided that the new name and programming ideas were stupid and changed their name back to "Sci-fi" and get back to actually showing science fiction.

It may have had something to do with an angry Klingon and a Wookie coming to their offices.
 
So all the vampires, demons, mummies, ghosts and mythical horrors which had been dominating SyFy, went to the nearest community college which offered writing classes. The reason they went there was to recruit the writing students to write paperback novels about them, the monsters.
 
Captain Obvious noticed the Vampires and said, "Hey, wait...weren't you call killed off in that super awesome battle, in posts #700-703? "
 
One vampire answered: "None of us _were_ vampires at the time of that battle. It's often forgotten that a person can _become_ a vampire by committing suicide; and all of us killed ourselves rather than be forced to watch Miley Cyrus on television."

Overhearing this, Grey Eagle said to Captain Obvious, "They seem to have a good excuse for becoming vampires. Perhaps we can get Bat-Bat to work on _curing_ them of being vampires, rather than have to destroy them."
 
The first thing to do was get rid of the source of the vampirism. That was rather easy. Thor had been angry with Miley for what she did to his hammer in a music video and decided to have words with her. That's when it turned out that Miley Cyrus was merely a clever and cunning disguise for...

LOKI!
 
"I must admit," said Loki with a smirk. " It was not my brightest idea, but I've been at this job for thousands of years. I have hit a rough patch."

transformed into one of his other forms... Justin Bieber and said, " now if you excuse me I gotta go write my name on the Pyramids, scribble an insensitive message in the guest book of the Gettysburg Memorial, and have my lackeys carry me up the steps of the Parthenon."
 
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"Here's another rough patch for you!" shouted a voice from behind Grey Eagle. It was Agent Coulson of S.H.I.E.L.D., carrying the super-gun with which he had managed at least to cause Loki some pain in the Avengers movie. "Surprise, creep, I'm alive!"-- and he fired TWO shots into Loki, causing Loki to pass out from pain long enough for Coulson to escape back to his new TV show.
 
"Now," said Thor picking up the unconscious Loki. "If you'll excuse me, I'll go take Loki back to the Asgard for punishment. Already I am feeling like forcing him to listen to the insipid teeny-bopper music he cranked out. This should give you the chance to save those turned into vampires by listening to Miley Cyrus."
 
"I'm innocent!" cried Loki. "It's not my fault. It's my family's! I had such a terrible childhood."

The Harlequin (from a few pages ago) laughed. "You grew up being worshipped as the god of mischief and were revered as royalty by those around you. Why should we believe you?"

"Because I am the rightful king of Asgard!" Loki complained.

"Thor's older than you," Harlequin pointed out. "Even if you weren't a Jotunn, He would still be first in line for the throne."
 
"But I would make for a much better ruler," said Loki. " There would be a leg of mutton over every spit, a pint of ail in every cellar, and free universal healthcare for all! Granted under me, healthcare means if you like your life, you can keep your life, unless I don't like you or find you undesirable."

"Indeed, "said The Red Skull ."I believe that my *boss* if you will, employed a similar plan. Eliminate the undesirables, and every one else is better off."

"See!" said Loki. "See, Red Skull knows that I am right. All that would have to be done is the whole world surrender to me, and let me kill my brother and his companions in the Avengers. "
 
A scruffy figure, so ragged and filthy that his age could not be guessed, asked Loki and Red Skull, "Will that be hope and change?"
 
Meanwhile, Grey Eagle watched the latest episode of the "Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D." series.... to discover that it was an outstanding exercise in Christian-bashing. In a storyline faintly reminiscent of the horror movies "Carrie" and "The Shining," a plot involving telekinesis was used as an excuse to lecture the audience about how stupid Christianity was. Yuk yuk, har de har, what a bunch of dumb hicks those Christians are! Anyone who's hip knows that believing in the Bible is only for childish, unstable, incompetent and prejudiced people!

And in a brilliant artistic touch, they managed all in one episode _both_ to ridicule the idea of God punishing anyone, and the idea of Him _forgiving_ anyone!

Grey Eagle decided he had had enough of that series.
 
The Harlequin hadn't seen it, but was horrified when the Grey Eagle told him. "Then again," he said, "no one can really say it was a surprise these days, unfortunately."
 
So Grey Eagle shamelessly plugged the series of sci-fi novels Joseph Ravitts was writing about him. "Note, Harlequin, that while _Christian_ morality is what these novels will support and recommend, the author thinks it necessary to admit the _existence_ of depraved conduct; therefore, the novels will never be seen on Dancing Lawn."
 
Meanwhile, the real Miley Cyrus resurfaced (who was no different then the Loki in disguse version) and she was elated .Readers were voting for her as Time Magazine's person of the year.

'See!"she said. "See! I am important! I am a great roll model for young girls! The best ever! "

To which Yochabed ( mother of Moses), Miriam, Deborah, Jael, Ester, Ruth, Mary the Mother of Jesus, Joan of Arc, Jane Austen, Charlotte Bronte, Elizabeth Barret Browning, Florence Nightengale, Madam Marie Curie, Harriet Tubman, Harriet Beecher Stowe, Susan B. Anthony, Anne Frank, Corrie ten Boom, Rosa Parks, Mother Theresa, Indira Gahndi, Margaret Thatcher, and Malala Yousafzai said, "Want to run that by us again?"
 
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Eleanour of Aquitaine, Martha Washington, Sacajawea, Jane Austen, Florence Nightingale, Susan B. Anthony, Marie Curie, Helen Keller (now able to see and hear), Hedy Lamar, Elizabeth Elliot, Kathy Troccoli, Michelle Malkin and Stacey Dash were also interested to hear more.
 
A number of fictional characters including, but not limited to Arwen Undomiel, Mina Harker, Clara Oswald, Eowyn, Annabeth Chase, Lucy Pevensie, Leia Organa Solo, Romanadvoratrelundar, and Sarah Jane Smith (all I could think of) also wished to hear more about this.
 
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