Attention-Deficit Roleplaying

BarbarianKing said:
While BarbarianKing and Maggie-chan were having their interesting discussion in some unknown locale, inside the Derelict, a near riot developed. Several of the Circus performers were complaining in force about Pippin banging his drum at all hours of the day and night and they have had enough. They were crowding the passages leading to Captain Obvious' quarters in hopes of bringing their complains directly to the big man. The Mafiya goons, never far from a nice scuffle, were blocking the corridors, preventing the complainers from approaching the Captain's door.
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Suddenly, Smerdyakov the purple duck slipped up between people's legs, and slashed the drumhead of Pippin's drum with a Swiss Army knife. "Problem solved," he told everyone. "I'll accept payment in rubles, since United States currency looks like falling down the drain."
 
An enormous bearded man (in both stature and girth) marches into the thread as if he's been there all his life, points one finger in the air as if he is about to make a very important proclamation, and says:

"Well, that's all very well and good, but how about getting me a drink? I'm a bit low on cash and I'll pay you back tomorrow. I give my word as a knight."
 
In a magic library in another dimension, two men sat in front of computers: an unaccustomed experience for them, since the smaller of the men had been born in a pre-computer society, and the larger in a pre-industrial society.

The larger man, Vissarion by name, called out to his friend, "Look here! I see a video of men entering a tavern called the Blue Boar. Something about the tavern, and about the speech of the people, suggests to me that it's a scene in the medium-random time-space continuum we were in just before we entered this multi-gated zone."
 
OOC:

I do have a real life friend called Maggie-Chan. The Character on this RP is based on her and the dialogue with BarbarianKing is pretty much based on our real-life interactions, which are really crazy as you can see from the screenshots below. They show one of our more "normal" conversations.

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Copperfox said:
In a magic library in another dimension, two men sat in front of computers: an unaccustomed experience for them, since the smaller of the men had been born in a pre-computer society, and the larger in a pre-industrial society.

The larger man, Vissarion by name, called out to his friend, "Look here! I see a video of men entering a tavern called the Blue Boar. Something about the tavern, and about the speech of the people, suggests to me that it's a scene in the medium-random time-space continuum we were in just before we entered this multi-gated zone."
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"...I found this moving picture of a cat," said his friend, "There seems to be a lot of these on this magic machine."
 
Vissarion looked at the cat video, finding it cute. When he turned back to his own terminal, what he saw next was not at all cute.

Someone had posted an extremely ordinary short poem. Under the poem was a caption which said: "If you do NOT immediately send this poem to twenty other people, you are a mean, bad, racist person who hates everyone and who wants babies to be sacrificed on bloody altars."

Vissarion drew his sword and smashed the screen.
 
Copperfox said:
Vissarion looked at the cat video, finding it cute. When he turned back to his own terminal, what he saw next was not at all cute.

Someone had posted an extremely ordinary short poem. Under the poem was a caption which said: "If you do NOT immediately send this poem to twenty other people, you are a mean, bad, racist person who hates everyone and who wants babies to be sacrificed on bloody altars."

Vissarion drew his sword and smashed the screen.
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"If you get to destroy something, so do I," said Ivan, shoving the monitor off the desk with a crash.

This activated both the sprinkler system and the fire alarm. Ivan said a few forum inappropriate words, and turned to his friend with a shrug.

"I suppose that's our cue to get going."
 
“Are you saying this has something to do with the Russian Mafia?”

“No, I don’t think so. I don’t think Captain Obvious would get involved in something like that. These guys are just along for the ride.”

“As what? Enforcers? Why would they want to go in the ship? Does it have anything to do with that purple duck? His quacking sounds in Russian accent.”

“Maggie-chan, have you ever heard a Russian duck quack before?”

“No, but I’ve seen it on the telly and he definitely sounds Russian, like this. ‘quackiii, quackiii”

“You’re quacking like a duck. Is ist in Russian?” BarbarianKing laughed. “Look, people are staring. Hahahaha.”

Maggie just looked at the other patrons and smiled. Then turning to BK again. “But anyway, that’s not the point. I understand why you want to go, the whole video game geek thing, but why in that ship?”

“I don’t know, those guys sound like fun. I’m actually befriending one of those goons, when he comes out on shore leave.”

“You what? How?”

“I was listening to t.A.T.u’s Lyudi Invalidy the other day at Indian Market when one of those guys was walking by. He stopped to ask how I got the music and where he could get the CD. We just had a nice conversation that day… Well, I think it was nice, he spoke mostly in Russian and ordered me to let him listen to the rest of my Russian songs. He liked the album art with the pretty singers and all that. We sort of became friends.”

“Isn’t that song a dis on disabled people?”

“Not really. The band said they were singing about ‘morally disabled’ people and that's ok with me.”

“And you plan to use that guy to sneak into the ship?”

“If I can.”

“What does that mean?”

“My plan actually involves someone else.”

“Who?”

“By the way, is Kiki-San still making deliveries to the docks?”

“Now, wait a minute.”
 
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Smerdyakov began stealing shoes, in order to distract people from talking any more about the girl singers who called themselves T.A.T.U. Smerdyakov was aware that continuing discussion of those young ladies would lead to disturbance on The Dancing Lawn.

Meanwhile, in the dimension with the magic library, a librarian stood in the way of Ivan and Vissarion, to question why two computers had been destroyed. But when Vissarion explained about the post demanding endless sharing of the poem or you were a bad person, the librarian smiled. "The reason why we MOVED our library to this dimension," she said, "was to GET AWAY from those pests, and from telemarketers. Have a nice day, gentlemen. I'll clean up."
 
TWO WEEKS EARLIER

BarbarianKing was on the roof of a storage bay not far from the D-pads at the Riise Interstellar Spaceport, looking in an easterly direction with a pair of powerful binoculars. He did not notice the approaching Hovertruck which came to a stop right beneath his position. A slender female in her late 20s with long black hair and blue eyes stepped out of the vehicle and called to him.

"BK, HEY! WHAT ARE YOU DOING UP THERE!"

"Oh, Hi Kiki-San," said BK trying to put the binoculars behind his back in a clumsy move.

"What are you doing up there?"

"Nothing, just checking out the horizon."

"You're checking out that Nimbus cruiser, aren't you?"

"N-No. Why do you say that?"

"The horizon is behind you, duh, and the only interesting thing in the other direction is that Nimbus Class Cruiser at the D. What's going on?

"Actually I'm also checking out that Argentinian Transport, it looks kinda interesting."

"The Gabriel Heinze from Espaciales Argentinas? I don't think so, there's tons of those transports, but only one Nimbus cruiser, probably the only one in existence right now. Tell me what are you planning.

"I'm not planning anything, you're always suspecting I'm up to something. How did you find me here?"

"I'm making my deliveries, and you are always scheming something crazy."

"Well, I'm not scheming anything, Kiki."

"Whatever it is, don't get my little sister involved again or you'll hear from me."

"I haven't even seen Maggie in forever, how is she?"

"Really? Maybe that's why she is doing fine, BK. Yep, she's been doing really well lately."

"Ha ha."

The pretty lady got back into her hovertruck and took off, but not before yelling, "STAY AWAY FROM MY SISTER, BK. I'M WARNING YOU!"

"NICE TO SEE YOU TOO, KIKI-SAN!"
 
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By this time, the Harlequin had left the tavern, and was again trying to get a place aboard the 'Derelict'. He even offered to pay for transport. You see, he had never been in space before, his show being mostly Italian and French-centric.
 
Two men were speaking within hearing of the Harlequin. They were the future-private-eye characters from "Cowboy Bebop," discussing whether they might offer to assist Barbarian King at finding safe opportunities to meet the young woman he seemed to be interested in.
 
WarriorSatyr said:
By this time, the Harlequin had left the tavern, and was again trying to get a place aboard the 'Derelict'. He even offered to pay for transport. You see, he had never been in space before, his show being mostly Italian and French-centric.
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Aboard the Derelict, someone brought in a note to Captain Obvious and told him it was from some gentleman in a funny checkered costume. "Harle..qué? Hummm.... Sounds Spanish," said Captain Obvious. When someone explained that it was not Harlequé but Harlequin and that the gentleman was Italian and was requesting permission to board, the Captain said, "Well, that explains the funny dress. Send this request to the duck and have him check this guy out. And tell him to tell his guys I only want him checked out, not beat up."
 
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"Of course!" replied the purple duck. "A true collector always wants to enlarge his collection."

Meanwhile, in the dimension with the magic library, Ivan and Vissarion were looking for the nearest inter-dimensional exit.
 
MANY WEEKS EARLIER IN A SECRET BAT (REAL BAT) CAVE

BK was wondering why he had to wear five blindfolds and a motorcycle helmet placed the wrong way, with the dark visor to the back of his head every time he came here. On top of that today he wore a can can dancer's bright red feather headpiece. When everything had been removed, he saw the familiar silhouette of a bat disguised as a bat standing in a semi dark corner of the room.

"Bat-Bat, I don't really understand why I have to wear all that stuff when you call me here. You know I would never reveal anything about you or your headquarters," said BK throwing the blindfolds to the floor and placing the helmet and head piece on a table. BK served himself a glass of cold water that from a pitcher that had been placed on the same table and sat at a chair, which was about 10 yards from where Bat-Bat was standing.

"Not willingly, not," replied the bat, "but there are people who would try to do evil things to you or any other of my agents if they knew you knew."

"I understand the blindfolds and the helmet, but the feathers?"

"Oh, that... My butler was just having fun with you. You don't need it, of course." Bat-Bat smiled.

"Now, how can I be of assistance this time?" BK asked, obviously expecting another deep cover assignment to roam the world searching for sexy -or homely- vampires in order to rid the planet of them.

"There is an old super-hero, a bit past his prime." Bat-Bat paused for effect, I think. "He's really a good guy, but he's a little odd. He's planning something really crazy."

"Ok."

"Several other agents went through great lengths, like having to eat at fancy restaurants, to bring this information to me. That man is planning an interstellar trip and has purchased himself a modified Nimbus-Class cruiser." This time Bat-Bat really paused for effect and after and awkward silence BK said:

"You need my help to stop him?"

"No. I want you to go on that trip."
 
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"Queenie," the Dancing Lawn roleplay version of Hans Christian Andersen's Snow Queen, who owed nothing to the ultra-revisionist "Frozen" character and had been around a lot longer, stepped in just then (being an old acquaintance of Bat-Bat).

"Excuse me, gentlemen, but my daughter Cora's at school now, Baby Augie is in daycare, and my husband Emmett is still busy in Copperfox's Tolkien-pastiche story, so I was free to ramble a bit. Passing by here, I heard mention of an old superhero having some kind of problem. Are you talking about Grey Eagle?"
 
In the meantime, inside the SS Derelict, life continued as normal, or at least as normal as things could get in that ship. Pippin was able to find himself another drum, but in order to avoid another brouhaha from the circus performers, he was given new quarters which, unknown to everyone except a couple of deep cover agents and a bat, were right next to a small compartment near a starboard bulkhead, a compartment that did not show in any schematics of the ship, either before or after it had gone through several modifications.

Over there, where nobody could hear, Pippin banged the darn thing to his heart's content, seeing that there were no red alerts that required him to be busy pushing the button.
 
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