Glorious Food II (Please Don't Delete)

However, the Italians guarding her in jail got from her the secret recipe for GKoN's bane...EWWWW de Cologne...and charged after him, partially drowning him in it, and convingcing the Germans that he was, in fact, not Elrond (for Elrond LIKED Cologne):D
 
Then Dernhelm appeared again, out of nowhere. She looked at the mongoose, and said, "THAT'S GKoN! Get him!" The Italians immediately captured him...
 
And stuffed him full of Lindt chocolate. After a full 18 years (in which he did not age a day), they let him go and gave him $1,000,000,000,000,000,000 for being so annoying. GKoN then raised his own private military and invaded the far away land of...
 
(...and adopted the methods of thought used by the population of said land [just jking GKoN]) . However, his invasion was not much of a success, the inhabitants of this land did nothing to resist him, but did nothing to obey him after he had assumed control. In disgust, he...
 
"... just bought a dairyfarm, and sold milk and ice cream." So, without further delay, they bought over 500,000 cows. But there was a problem with this type of cow. It...
 
was skilled in combat.:eek: The knight-mongoose saw the potential of the cows so he immediately formed another army n' loosed 'em upon GERMANY!!:eek: The Germans fled in terror before the near-invincible cows...:D
 
who sadly, only had a 36 hour life. At the end of the 36 hours all of the cows were dead. The German citizens then shipped them off to Canada. Who...
 
thought that a bunch of dead cows might prove to be nice fertilizer for their 11,000 square-mile forest. Unfortunately, 36 hours after the cows had died, they vanished. Needless to say, this caused a sudden influx of heat from the Sun to replace the space that the dead cows had vanished from, causing the polar ice caps to melt and the world to be flooded. This...
 
were instantly brought back to life by the influx of coldness from the North Pole, which froze the water again and revived anyone who had drowned. The polar ice caps were now at the equator, so...

EDIT: Oops, LoL got there before me. Oh well...

Here's the answer to HER post:

running in the direction the CW was last seen heading, meanwhile...
 
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