Glorious Food II (Please Don't Delete)

[Olórin the Wise]

, causing a group of troops to converge upon the area. This only panicked the frightened natives even more, so...

 

[Lady of Lorien]

they shrieked and started clacking. This was especially frightening to them, because said teddy had several pairs of extra eyes painted on his furry face, and...

 

[Gondor Knight of Narnia]

The troops thought he was a MUTANT!! They were gonna drop nerve gas on the poor teddy when OUT POPPED JACK SPARROW!! "Hey now, that's my bit..." He said to the Teddy. "What are scaring these poor natives for anyways?" The Teddy thusly ate Captain Sparrow, braided beard and all, then ran off. He found a Nautilus submarine and "borrowed" it...

 

[Lady of Lorien]

only to find to his disconcertment that a great, tentacly critter was playing Captain Nemo's Organ inside, and

 

[Olórin the Wise]

A number of his minions were knocking on the door. "Oh dear," cried the teddy bear, "...

 

[Lady of Lorien]

where is my seaweed pipe? I simply CAN'T recieve company without it! He...

 

[Gondor Knight of Narnia]

grumped...and the teddy ate the tentacled creature. His minions all gasped and screamed like sissies!

 

[Lady of Lorien]

, while their crustacean-ridden visages crumbled with dismay. The Teddy then sat down to play Nemo's organ, but "EWWW!!!" he bellowed... "IT'S ALL SLIMY!!!!" and he refused to touch a key until...

 

[Gondor Knight of Narnia]

the sea goons cleaned it up, or gave him teddy gloves. Meanwhile Legolas was plotting revenge for his hair...

 

[Lady of Lorien]

the sea goons cleaned it up, or gave him teddy gloves. Meanwhile Legolas was plotting revenge for his hair...

Which now required many gallons of gel to control...

 

[Gondor Knight of Narnia]

When Aragorn n' Boromir saw Legolas' frizzy hair they looked at each other and laughed...

 

[Lady of Lorien]

, saying to each other, "I KNEW we shoulda gotten him that hair gel for Christmas, but...the bow seemed so much more...well...MORE..."

 

[Gondor Knight of Narnia]

The teddy ordered the goons to take the sub to Germany, where he would steal a big fat warship...

 

[Lady of Lorien]

although he unfortunately ran into a giant squid in the middle, and...

 

[Gondor Knight of Narnia]

Growled a teddy bear growl. The squid just laughed...and got a torpedo in his piehole The teddy ordered them to floor it whilst the squid was trying to get the torpedo out of his mouth...

 

[Lady of Lorien]

but sadly for the teddy, the submarine WAS the torpedo, and so it was in the squid's mouth...

 

[Gondor Knight of Narnia]

Alas, the teddy hit the self-destruct button n' ran as the sea goons held the squid off...He made it out n' swam to shore-to find himself in Germany...

 

[Lady of Lorien]

- Cologne, in fact, where a bunch of German inhabitants started running after him with...you guessed it...Eau de Cologne..because he smelled so terrible...

 

[Gondor Knight of Narnia]

- Cologne, in fact, where a bunch of German inhabitants started running after him with...you guessed it...Eau de Cologne..because he smelled so terrible...

He made the sailors faint! He grinned evilly, and soon was heading out of port with a big shiney warship...

 

[Lady of Lorien]

, which, unfortunately, held more water INSIDE than OUTSIDE, and soon began to drop...lower...and lower...and loooooooower............