Roleplay By Monologues

Status
Not open for further replies.
Smerdyakov is surprised to see an unmistakable superhero flying toward his cage: the awe-inspiring Grey Eagle. Landing, Grey Eagle resumes his normal form of Joseph Richard Ravitts, U.S.N. Retired, also known as Copperfox. To the purple duck's surprise, the old man is barefoot.

"I go barefoot sometimes, because I'm told it does something or other for your health, and I can use all the health I can get. Now, let me tell you a true story from the real world.

"When I was about 24 years old, I was one of the artists at an outdoor Christian music concert in Rockford, Illinois. After my set, I was talking with a scruffy man close to my age, who hung out in one of the local bars. His muddy brain had managed to hold on to just enough awareness of childhood religious teaching so that he could spring what he thought was a brilliant piece of smart-alecking. Citing what Jesus said about giving people the clothes off your back, he said that I should be willing to give my shirt to him if I was a real Christian. So, instead of running off as he expected and wanted, I _gave_ him the shirt off my back right then.

"_Another_ bar customer witnessed this. He was so impressed, that he ran to his nearby apartment and brought a shirt of _his_ from there, which he promptly gave to me! I always referred to _that_ shirt as my 'spiritual shirt,' because it was a reminder of my obedience to God. I still have it, though I'm too, um, portly now for it to fit me."

Smerdyakov scowled. "And the point of all this is--?"

"The point, poultry-boy, is one which I would like to keep on explaining in exclusively Christian terms; but the hucksters of the so-called Fairness Doctrine will throw a tantrum and sulk and pout if I don't include something multicultural. So I refer you to the Chinese saying: 'Yield to overcome.' If my friends don't find you some shoes to _your_ liking, I will personally _give_ you that pair of mine which you were admiring."
 
Loverble now bumps into Copperfox during the wedding. She had missed all of this because of an insane urge to swim constantly for a week. When she had made up her mind to stop and had dryed off she found herself in the middle of a wedding. When she askes him for another dance he replys with a yes. Between them they also decide to make this as a celebration for the wedding of the reforemed-and-no-longer-evil Snow Queen and Emmett.
 
Smerdyakov looks blankly at Joe.

"Wait...so I don't have to whine and gripe? Hold on, I was going to kill you and you're willing to give me the shoes I was going to kill you for?" He tries to smirk, but ends up bursting into tears.

"No, what? You...*sniff* Darn. I'm not..*sniffle* crying, am I?" He wipes his eyes with a wing. He coughs to clear his throat.
"I'm ok. *sniff* Darn you, Joe. Now I've got the warm fuzzies. *cough*" He sobs for several hours, trying to regain his composure.

"Ok. NOW I'm ok. Although if anyone hears that I was crying, you'll become an unperson"

Me: Now, now, Smerdy, be nice. *dumps selection of shoes on the ground in front of him* Do you like any of these?

Smerdyakov: No. His shoes are the only ones I like. *looks up to Joe in awe*

Me: What is it about his shoes that you like so much?

Smerdyakov: They're pretty.

Me: Men don't wear shoes that are "pretty"

Smerdyakov: Well, his are!

Me: Come on, Smerdy, these look exactally the same as his.

Smerdyakov: They're not the same! They're not his shoes.

Me: So....you just want to deprive him of his shoes? You don't even want them?

Smerdyakov: I want them because they're his shoes.

Me: :confused: Weird duck.

Smerdyakov ignores me and goes to sit on Joe's shoulder, like a parrot.
 
Copperfox says to Spanish Inquisition, "Thanks for helping to reason with the duck. When Lonny gets back, would you please tell her that I'm at The Octopus Garden, the vegetarian restaurant which I own in this roleplay-reality, that I'm giving shoes to Smerdyakov, but that he still might want to see whatever she's found also?"

To Loverble, Copperfox says, "Thanks for the quick response to my message; but if you thought the wedding of Emmett and 'Queenie' was already in progress, it isn't. No harm done by your hasty post, though; this is the Monologues RP, where it's okay to ignore an existing entry. Queenie has been waiting literally for _centuries_ to find the man of her dreams; they got engaged in a hurry, but they'll take some time planning the wedding so it can be a real event. The dancing we discussed will celebrate the engagement."
 
Copperfox said:
Copperfox says to Spanish Inquisition, "Thanks for helping to reason with the duck. When Lonny gets back, would you please tell her that I'm at The Octopus Garden, the vegetarian restaurant which I own in this roleplay-reality, that I'm giving shoes to Smerdyakov, but that he still might want to see whatever she's found also?"
Click to expand...

The Inquistion says: "Sorry about him. I think his creation came from a cross between my current obsession with ducks, and the time I ODed on the Brothers Karamazov by reading it in a week,"

Smerdyakov puts Joe's shoe on his head, like a hat. (even though it's slipped down over his eyes)

Smerdyakov: "Gee, thanks, Copperfox. Now I'm going to be your BEST FRIEND!" And he continues to trail CF wherever he goes.
 
Some party hacks from the "change" party showed up in the thread again when they heard there was purple duck around. Intent on applying their "Fairness Doctrine" they said it was not "fair" to have only one purple duck. And it was not fair either if all the ducks chose a color. Their solution was to have EVERY duck painted purple.

And so, Smerdyakov saw all the ducks as purple as himself and realized he wasn't unique anymore. The role players might as well be talking about Smithy, the previously brown duck. Smerdyakov felt there was no point in remaining in this thread.

The party hacks were also looking for Bat-Bat to check on his costume and and see if they could give bat costumes to all the other regular bats according to the "Fairness Doctrine." But Bat-Bat is like Chuck Norris. You can't find him, he finds you!
 
Ooc: I will post more about Queenie later


Vin Diesel found his way into the monologue thread. He was surprised to see Chuck Norris. Bat-bat welcomed him but warned him NOT to participate in the spell rpg. Some 13 years old played hide and seek and they had found a way to keep themselves hidden. They borrowed the magic cloak of Harry Potter and brought it with them in the spell rpg. Bat-bat kept a close eye on this rpg and decided to warn the hidden girls. Vin Diesel was wearing his sunglasses and pretended to be Riddick.
 
"Holy moley," she said. "Has the Roleplay by Monologues gone mad(der)?" SongsofLife was astonished and amazed to see how muach and many posters and plots had advanced, started and stopped while she had been working hard and much the past 3 days on other worldy matters. "Good heavens: evil transformed to good, Emmet and Queenie, Spanish Inquisition and Loverble dancing with Copperfox. What else could there be?"

"Cats and dogs lions and lambs sleeping together! Yeah, that's it. That's the ticket! "

"Let it be know to all here present who have presents and are not here: Today is the day of peace between lions and lambs, brothers and sisters, and God and man. Yahooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!"

*Songs twirls off the page and returns to her work*
 
Smerdyakov suddenly felt disoriented. "Weren't we at your vegetarian restaurant where you gave me your shoes?" he asked Copperfox. "And then didn't we visit your gunslinger friends? And then didn't some hack big-government politicians dye the other ducks purple? How did we get to this place that looks like 'the construct' in 'The Matrix'?"

"We were thrown here by the latest forum choke-up," replied Copperfox, unperturbed. "Yes, you and I did visit the steakhouse. I referred to you as my new friend; you behaved in your comical way by quacking, 'BEST friend!' I told Emmett that my dancer had finally called me to confirm her availability, and Emmett spoke about his getting engaged to the former Snow Queen. I mentioned sarcastically that the baby feminists would insist that this was a matter of HER forgiving HIM for something, when in reality it was SHE who had until recently been evil and was now ashamed of it.

"It was a good report I wrote of our meeting with Emmett and Jake; but I'm too busy now to re-write it all from scratch, if the system's erased it. What I've just reviewed for you is the essence of what happened there. After that came the part about you getting disgusted and leaving because of the color duplication on ducks. These crashes cause terrible confusion on threads that are trying to be consistent; but we'll work things out some way."

Smerdyakov regained his evil grin. "Do you want me to assassinate the site administrators?"

"NO!" exclaimed Copperfox. "Don't blame them for computers and networks being treacherous. But if you can catch the gremlins that MAKE the jam-ups happen, the administrators and I will thank you to torture them horribly to death."

While Smerdyakov was considering this, Copperfox went to his highly esteemed forum-sister Songs of Life and quietly told her, "No one seems to get that Isaiah passage straight. It actually describes WOLVES, not lions, as lying down beside lambs and not eating them. People got the idea that it was LIONS with lambs for two reasons: one, because lion and lamb both start with L in English, and people enjoy alliteration; two, because the Lord Jesus in His own nature unites the archetypal qualities of a lion and a lamb."
 
Last edited:
MGGT walks into Emmett's Steakhouse and orders lemonade. Her cell phone is broken so nobody can reach her now but MGGT doesn't mind. It's a bit quiet but that's not bad.
 
Alice walks on with her notes in her hand, trying to ignore Tweedle dee and Tweedle dum's annoying chatter behind her. They were making her research nearly impossible, and she wanted to tell them to 'shut up' but that would have been terribly rude.
 
Trinity serves MGGT, noticing the new customer's Dutch accent, and says, "Excuse me, but aren't you the Dutch lady Copperfox used to talk about all the time? If so, is it true that you recently got married? Congratulations!" The athletic black-haired woman sighs. "I wish Neo and I had gotten married before--Well, never mind that."
 
"Well, at least they forgot about battling one another," Alice thought.
"Would you like to see a battle?" Tweedle Dee suddenly asked.
"Oops," thought Alice. "Thought too soon." out loud, she added, "Ummm. No. I don't think so."
Tweedle Dum looked disappointed and said, "Please??"
Alice shok her head. "No. You two don't need to be running around hurting each other!"
 
"Do you think we would fight battles if we expected to get really hurt?" said Tweedledum.

"We're afraid of getting hurt!" exclaimed Tweedledee.
 
Alice looked at them. "If you are afraid of getting hurt, then why do you fight at all?" she asked, looking at them with a very quizzical expression on her face.
 
Status
Not open for further replies.
Back
Top