Spacebullies Two: The Search For More Parody

It turned out that some of the most advanced Redundantworlders lived near the Twice-Branching Sea. Black Stingray, the only visiting hero at this location who couldn't naturally breathe water, took an hour or more to give people in the coastal region an overview of how his highly sophisticated diving suit worked.

Since Tunakassrol, Tunafishla and Howie Maui COULD naturally breathe water, it was agreed that they would go deeper and farther out. Black Stingray (whose birth name I have decided was Yepyep Mammameeya-- think of it as belonging to some language from the Africa of Urth) would stay with five natives who possessed a rudimentary version of scuba gear.

Three days of searching would prove inconclusive. Since there were three searchers who had NO limit on submerged time, they would eventually agree on fishing boats venturing out again, provided that the submersible heroes escorted these boats. Meanwhile, runners on land carried word to where Superdude and Superhottie were resting from recent combats. The super-cousins flew to opposite ends of the inland sea, and used their super-eyesight to verify that Aqua-Scorpion was not there. They did, however, notice possible signs of the arthropod monster crawling up the broad river which fed the inland sea.

Black Admiral found time to come and meet with She-Wow's friends; the scaly beauty Shibwazushu just happened to tag along with him. Introductions being made, Howie Maui remarked, "On our own Urth, Yepyep and I have heard reports from numerous worlds. We know that this Aqua-Scorpion, or one just like it, invaded the planet Waterpark, over in the 'Dune'-derived sub-universe. It was a seriously strong monster; and from what I hear about this 'Rock of Banality,' it won't have returned any WEAKER than it was before."

Black Admiral nodded. "Are you leading up to an inference?"

"Yes, an inference which can be acted upon. It's my suspicion that Aqua-Scorpion is intelligent enough to try to throw us off of its trail."

Shibwazushu came up alongside the man of her dreams, her left shoulder leaning against his right elbow. "It obviously didn't surface. Are you guessing that it clawed up the riverbed to MAKE ITS ENEMIES THINK that it traveled upriver, but actually returned to the floor of this inland sea?"

"Yes..... or farther. Since the Tonkrypians didn't see the Scorpion, it must have burrowed beneath the sea floor, shaking pursuit by tunneling laterally through bedrock, beyond the area Superdude and Superhottie thought of scanning."

Black Stingray looked at his friend, then looked at Black Admiral. "If it did ANY such burrowing, the sea level here should eventually begin measurably sinking, as water pours into the monster's tunnel."

Tunakassrol and Tunafishla had still been underwater at the time this discussion began, but at this point they joined the others. "We found an opening large enough to have been made by a monster," said the husband of this couple. Tunafishla added, "The tunnel seems to run that way," and pointed to the northeast.

"I'm not your commander," Black Admiral told the Anoxians, "but I suggest that you keep on building relations with this indigenous community. Our fighting evil on this planet will count for more if we build interstellar goodwill as we go. Since Shibby and I can both fly, we'll search along the path--" (glancing at Tunafishla) "--which you indicated."

Shibwazushu was pleased by her new hero already giving her a nickname, but refrained from gushing about it. She decided that she would look for a moment when it would feel natural, to begin addressing him by his first name of Tether.
 
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I overlooked She-Wow's winged horse, but yeah, the sapient pegasoid came to Redundantworld as well as Battery-Cat. TDL's search function won't let me find what that aerial mare was called. Canonical She-Ra cartoons call the steed "Swiftwind;" so for the present I'll call the talking pegasoid Quickwind. (Even humans may change their names on occasion.)

Okay, She-Wow came riding on Quickwind, to see what was going on with her mer-people friends. As soon as She-Wow dismounted, Tunafishla strode up to her. As a humorous greeting, the formerly-wicked merwoman did a playful imitation of throwing punches at the Queen of Anoxia. This was in a no-longer-bitter memory of the hundreds of times Tunafishla and She-Wow had fought bloodless unarmed battles; She-Wow had invariably won, but had always avoided hurting her outclassed foe. Once Tunafishla, and Katlittura with her, turned good, She-Wow's merciful temperament had made reconciliation effortless.

After exchanging greetings, Tunafishla proceeded to report all she knew about the Aqua-Scorpion. She-Wow then asked: "Do you know if this monster has shoulders?"

"I can't say if any of the locals have seen it, but none of us here has actually seen it. Still, if it's referred to as a scorpion, it surely has forelimbs with pincers. I assume you're thinking of the classic wound-the-left-shoulder tactic?"

She-Wow nodded gravely. "You know that I hate to kill anyone."

Tunafishla nodded back. "That was fortunate for Katlittura and me. But in fairness to us, we were also reluctant to kill."

She-Wow hugged her. "You can't be any more glad than I am. But from what I've been told about Planet Waterpark, the Aqua-Scorpion doesn't share our preference for mercy. I'm afraid it probably will require extermination."

"Seems likely to me," snorted Quickwind.
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

Black Admiral and Shibwazushu had flown many miles. After every three or four miles they would land, and the relatively-non-human Heart Sapphire used her gem-energy to probe underground. Eventually, Shibwazushu found her chance to address her hero by first name WITHOUT calculating. "Tether! I think it must have reversed course just since I last probed!"

Tether "Black Admiral" Zappem nodded calmly. "Stuff happens, Shibby. It must be smarter than anyone guessed. All right, we'll just backtrack, with listening stops every HALF mile, till you uncover signs of it either withdrawing in straight-line reverse, or tunneling off in a different direction."

Since your author is juggling quite a few plates, we'll just say that the two of them finally caught up with Aqua-Scorpion. She-Wow and Winkyblue joined them, and together they DID succeed in capturing the monster without killing it. Dragon Equivvalentor brought it to his prison colony back on Anoxia, and went to work on taming it. Within the next three days, Tether and Shibby had reached the point where Tether was positively glad to hear Shibby speak about how Heart Sapphire energy could enable beings genetically as diverse from each other as he and she were, to procreate fully viable children, who in turn could interbreed with either of the parent races.......
 
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There'll be PLENTY more to depict on Redundantworld, but this is a decent point from which to revisit another plot arc: specifically, the "Heyho" plot arc, where the lovable A/I called Cortexa seeks happiness.
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The militant scoffer Tyrone Glass Nielsen, recently self-dubbed Mister Tectonic (the idea behind this name being Earth as opposed to Heaven), had been improving his control over the micro-drones which he labeled as "T-Sneers." Practicing his brainwave control over the little devices, he made them weave around obstacles; they could even exert a tiny pulse of artificial gravity to move small objects.

Sorceress Ickylinn, a native of Alwaysurnia who hated Sorcery Lass-- but who had no recent knowledge of her enemy's doings, and the reverse was equally true-- was with Tyrone in their hidden remote hideout. Their erotic bond was not exclusive, but each partner still came first with the other. Joining him in mid-practice, the beautiful wicked witch kissed him directly on the inverted-cross tattoo adorning his forehead.

"Have you crafted your strategy for Doctor Fallacy? I'm pretty confident about putting a leash on President Hughes." She was, of course, referring respectively to the inventor of Muledeer armor, and to the current President of Earth. Carolyn Fallacy and Jackman Hughes were both in positions to influence culture and society all across the United Civilizations. This whole interstellar community had already been totally secular for many decades, largely due to the fact that they knew about evil aliens who were driven explicitly by religious doctrines. Recently, however, the Heyhoverse had received its first genuinely external visitors...... and these friendly outsiders were themselves believers in a Creator. Tyrone and Ickylinn both furiously wanted the real God not to exist; they would rather see Heyho Earth and its allied worlds devastated by the Congregation, the Splash, the Varnished, or the Friendless, than see the real God bring them redemption and wisdom.

After protracted kissing and stroking, Tyrone answered Ickylinn's question. "My T-Sneers will be enough to rouse Fallacy's curiosity, because they work differently than any human or alien device she ever saw. From what I know about her, she'll be instantly eager to deal with me. I might even let her steal the credit for the invention; I can convince her that I 'believe in humanity' enough to care only about scientific progress."

The sworn enemy of Mighty Male nuzzled Mister Tectonic's neck. "Sounds good, sugar-brain. For my part, since these galactic infants know nothing about sorcery, I can concoct a magic potion for longevity, and offer it to President Hughes. Then I'll subvert his ethical integrity, urging him to keep my 'formula' secret from the Plethmors, the Efrachiktu, the Yettisquatch, the Doladags, and so on."

"Oooooh, delicious: create inter-species resentments! And if you can pull that off, we can spread word among the human-friendly races that Earthlings are keeping the longevity formula secret because Earthlings want this monopoly due to religious motives!"

After some gleeful making out on a couch, Ickylinn murmured, "Remember, dear, you have as much recreational freedom as I have. You should be able to achieve intimacy with Carolyn Fallacy; hard case though she is, she can't be all subzero ice. She does have a naturally- conceived daughter, after all, not cloned."

^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^
Ickylinn could become invisible with concentration. Once she was assured that Tyrone could get himself onto Planet Stretch, she turned her own attention to translocating onto Heyho Earth. In Melbourne, the planetary capital, she remained unseen until she was inside the presidential residence. She began whispering her man-catching enchantment before she dropped her invisibility. Once she was visible, all men close to her were stunned by her beauty, while women were staggered with envy. No one stopped her as she headed for the Earth President's private suite, one floor up. << If I ever said that Jackman Hughes was married, though I don't think I did, then his wife passed away long enough ago that he should be past the most agonizing stage of grief by now. >>

Economizing her strength, Ickylinn projected only mild confusion at anyone who might be inclined to bar her way. At last, she sensed the mind of what must be Earth's President, just past the door to the living quarters.

"President Jackman John Victor Hughes? Don't ask who I am, because I am she who can heal your heart. You deserve the love of a woman who can help you to carry your load."

If Ickylinn had given Mister Hughes cause to realize that she had bad intentions, his will was strong enough to have resisted her influence. But she had done a good enough job of seeming benevolent.....
 
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Meanwhile, landing not far from Doctor Fallacy's main research on Stretch, Tyrone activated what was becoming his new specialty: making his own virtual reality, to change actual circumstances into a reflection of low-quality computer-authored stories.

The corridor, six levels down from the surface of Stretch, seemed almost like an underground corridor. The heels of two shoes clicked on the tiled floor, sounding almost like heels of shoes clicking on a floor. The woman wearing the clicking shoes and a lab coat looked almost like a lady scientist who liked wearing shoes with only slightly raised heels when she was walking along underground corridors while wearing a lab coat. This woman was Carolyn Fallacy, the foremost person involved in the history of the Crackshots who had fought against the Introductories and the Congregation.

Mister Tectonic walked up to Carolyn, his eyes dancing. He never thought to wonder how eyeballs could dance. His heels clicked on the tiled floor as he crossed his arms. "Doctor Fallacy," he said, "I am called Mister Tectonic, and I can assist you in dealing with racist fascist religious fanatics who hate everyone that's different."

Being much less dishonest than her visitor, Carolyn crossed her arms. "You mean the Varnished?"

"No, I mean something far worse. The Introductories were, the Congregation holdouts are, and the Varnished and the Friendless are, still rooted in material reality. It's the xenophobic Nazi Christians who manipulate people into trusting an imaginary friend. It's the Christians who want to defy evolution by making us all regress to caveman times."

Suddenly, because A/I video narratives often jump backwards in time for no reason, Carolyn Fallacy was walking along the tiled corridor with her heels clicking. Mister Tectonic once again greeted her, and their dialogue was replayed, up through Tyrone's remark about cavemen.

Carolyn's lab coat stirred as she crossed her arms, and her eyes danced while her heels clicked on the tile floor even though she was currently standing still. "Can you show me anything now that illustrates what you can do to benefit the United Civilizations?"

Tyrone's eyes danced. "Yes, Doctor Fallacy. I have invented a new generation of micro-drones; I call them T-Sneers."

Carolyn uncrossed her arms in order to cross them again. "Do you call them that because they facilitate sneering at supernatural fables?"

"Got it in one! I knew you were smart. Let's make love!"

Carolyn's eyes danced as she uncrossed her arms in order to embrace him. Between wet kisses, she told him: "I have longed for a partner who shared my brilliant insight that religion is the real and only cause of istophobic fascism!"

Tyrone refrained from telling her something which he knew to be true on Original Earth and on every sufficiently-close copy of that world. It was a fact that the historical Nazis had been admirers of the atheist philosopher Friedrich Nietzsche.
 
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After two hours of shared enjoyment, Carolyn and Tyrone headed for an in-house dining facility. Besides humans and beings from human-friendly races, there were twenty or more former Congregation personnel, from the sizeable contingent which had successfully made peace with the settlers of Stretch. Carolyn linked her personal cellphone-equivalent to the public-address system, selecting outlets other than private and classified spaces.

"Attention, all personnel! This is Doctor Fallacy. There is no emergency, but the following needs to be known. I have been introduced to a human from a galactic sector outside of our known space. He goes by the codename of Mister Tectonic, and he has innovations in electronics which he will share with my staff and me. Intelligence units will take part in assessing how Mister Tectonic's innovations should be integrated into the inventory of the Galactic Navy, Marines and Army. Distinct from defense applications, Tectonic possesses deep ontological wisdom, which need not be kept secret at all. Tectonic will be dining here now; yes, he eats food like anyone else. Within bounds of good manners, all of you are welcome to ask him about his brilliant worldview."

A female Juggernasty named Wiffsog rose from the seat where she had been eating and conversing with several technicians of the squirrel- shaped Efrachiktu race. Her features proclaiming recognition, she addressed the newcomer in her own tongue: "Tyrone Glass Nielsen! I was there when you conferred with Highmaster Starterus, before he reached an accommodation with the human leadership! You briefed Starterus on your capabilities."

Two T-Sneers had begun flying toward Wiffsog, barely above the floor, as soon as Tyrone realized that he had been recognized. The two micro-drones rose to the level of her ears, becoming transparent. Wiffsog made it as far as saying, "I remember being amazed when you created--" before the T-Sneers tampered with her cerebral activity. Not to harm her, only to slow down her thoughts and intentions. It would not do for her to blurt out the fact that, even before assuming a comicbook-ish alias, Tyrone had acquired the ability to create the Sankasselum character called Julep'Drinka.

Instead, he filled the silence by saying, "Yes, I was already at work on creating the circuitry for my T-Sneers. It's good to be given some credit."

Carolyn Fallacy picked up the thought for her new lover. "And it can be revealed now that Mister Tectonic's early influence was a vital factor in bringing about the present happy state of truce and mutual trust."

^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^
Our scene is now transported to the Thregbonker Embassy in Earth's planetary capital. Shilkovim, a Bonkalub female, still held her position as resident information- technology consultant for her ambassador. It remained true that Mister Kuo Pai-Mong, who had once worked with Carolyn Fallacy on Stretch, was Shilkovim's closest human friend in Melbourne.

(Allow me here to remind you that, in the Heyhoverse prehistory which never actually happened, Bonkalubs had survived the perils of a savage planet only by their wits-- e.g. building barriers to keep carnivores out. Physically they were unimpressive; the side- silhouette view of a Bonkalub vaguely resembled a snail, with a head protruding forward more than upward.)

Admitted to Shilkovim's office, Pai-Mong went straight to the point. "Shilkovim, I'm worried about President Hughes. He's missed a Cabinet meeting, and doesn't even want to leave his personal quarters. What's more, security cameras in those quarters have been shut off."

The lumpish programmer's head bobbed. This was not a nod for her kind, it was more a gesture of puzzlement. Pai-Mong added: "It's always possible that Earthside humans dislike their president; but you have no special stake in our domestic politics. Can you dream up a pretext to come study the surveillance system?"

"I think so. And I do have a stake in the United Civilizations not being disrupted by treason on its heart-planet."

Unfortunately, Shilkovim was unprepared to encounter magic. Ickylinn sensed her coming, and produced a delusion in the Bonkalub's mind that she had spoken with Jackman Hughes, that President Hughes had given her a satisfactory explanation..... and that no one else was in his living quarters.

But fear not, readers: the good-aligned wizard Hector von Bootblack, from his extra- dimensional headquarters, observed the dirty trickery, and sent a psychic alert to the non-human Jedi-equivalent Zubdookree. More of this later.
 
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NEXT, WE TURN TO BAZOOKADAR, THE "HOLLOW EARTH" SETTING INSIDE PLANET FREESOIL.......

On the island of Rugdamont, which sat in one of the larger bodies of water on the planet's inside surface, King Trampelfar and Queen Frazetta were speaking with two up-side Fuss users. One, Exmaknor of the purple-skinned Dishwasheeri race, had been in the campaign against intruding Glukks. The tusk-faced Master Plow Korn, by far the more prestigious of the two, had never seen Bazookadar before, nor any other hollow-planet environment. As a Fuss master enjoying fame and respect in the Directvidean system, Plow Korn had just come from there as escort to a commercial delegation.

Only after discussion of the victory over the Glukks had run its course did Frazetta move the conversation to a new subject, something of which up till now they had heard only hints from Tarp Kanvas, the chief executive of the mixed-race colony on the outside.

"Master Korn, my husband and I had no concept of carts or boats with a life of their own, carts and boats which receive some kind of nourishment as tame animals are fed, until the outer-space people established interaction with us." (In the language used by the Rugdamonters, an expression similar to the English phrase "outer space" was their best way of denoting the wide-open outer world whose existence remained a cosmic novelty to them.) Trampelfar took it from there: "You say that the people called 'Chimpanzians' have these living-cart creations?"

The up-side hero nodded. "The Chimpanzians are physically similar to your Slambangani, but are smarter, and have a sense of right and wrong. The world of Chimpanzia has possessed vehicles of some kind for at least a growing-from-baby-to-adult space of time. These travel-things were fed on a food called 'coal;' but my friends and I worry about what the use of coal might do to the air of your inside world. Another kind of nourishment exists for 'living carts;' we call it 'ethanol.' When ethanol is consumed by vehicles, it makes far less change to the air than coal does. Now, there are ways to make the use of coal much cleaner than some people realize, but it takes fairly high technology to do that; so ethanol still is a good option for Bazookadar."

Exmaknor cut to the chase: "The Chimpanzians grow some types of plants which are very good for making ethanol. Plants of that sort are just now beginning to be cultivated on the outside. If this prospers, Tarp Kanvas and his people will negotiate with you over how Bazookadarans can adopt the use of ethanol-burning machines without unmanageable costs for either side."

Trampelfar swept his eyes across the visitors. "I have seen enough of the outside to notice that you need set-apart locations, what you call 'factories,' to perform the kind of work which goes into creating your advanced machines. It seems to me that one of the earliest steps we will have to take will be marking off places for the first such workplaces that will be established within our world."

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

On the outside, on the surface of Planet Freesoil, Tarp Kanvas and the prominent citizen Abner Litttleton were similarly discussing business with a male Chimpanzian: Antilacor, a high-ranking law-enforcement officer who was friends with Plow Korn. Two females of other species were listening in: Shahoopy, a Greedork respected among her people, and the Wingdinger Keldasura who had adapted to the outside world better than her fellows.

"Some of you," Antilacor was saying, "know how my native world was invaded by an evil offworld coalition. Our lack of rapid transportation for troops was as great a handicap as our inferiority in combat. Everybody in my race would have been killed or enslaved, if we hadn't had brave protectors with high technology and special powers."

Shahoopy said to Keldasura, "You can understand that. It took some well-applied technology, as well as gallant sacrifices, to rid Bazookadar of the accursed Glukks. And the Empire of Evil Badness, where I was born, wasn't easily liberated either."

Tarp Kanvas faced Abner with a toothy smile. "You know how Denzel and Lumlabbish never tire of talking about Lodge Flake."

Stirring her wings, Keldasura looked at the six-limbed chieftain in turn. "Who is Lodge Flake?"

"A human hero of the Second Galaxy. Since forces of good made him nearly invincible, he's also known as Captain Rightawrong. Denzel and Lumlabbish were among Freesoil citizens who were transported to the 'Stellar Federation' in that galaxy, to learn what was going on there, and to offer their own insights about building a representative government in place of a dictatorship ruling from the top downward."

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Miles away from where this many-sided conversation was proceeding, Denzel and Lumlabbish Powder were busy rendering miscellaneous assistance to a human born in the Dune-derived sub-universe. Colin Tunguska, not mentioned heretofore in my story, was a reformed Lazytaxie. It was his fellowship which had produced the Goulash clones of Bunkem Isotope and Duke Neato Ashtrayides. Colin had put cloning behind him, and as a naturalized Freesoiler he now used his knowledge to help original-self people adjust to new environments.

The really-big empire once ruled by the Calamari Dynasty had no indigenous non-human sapients at all. In his months dwelling on Freesoil, starting before the discovery of the hollow inner world, he had met Greedorks, Tryyurlucks, and the Pseudo-Edgar-Rice-Burroughs -Martians. With a spinning head, he had wondered if all non-human sapients had green skin. Adding to his wonderment was the fact that the Creator had given Tarp Kanvas' people increased strength, cardiovascular capacity and bone density to offset their originating on a lower- gravity planet.

John Cardsharper, longtime friend of Tarp Kanvas, was also in attendance, using his telepathy to interpret for Colin as needed. One Bazookadaran cavewoman (who need not be named, it's only a walk-on role) asked Colin, "Do all outer-space people have these 'rhythms' of which you speak?"

"Yes. Actually, you inner-world people have body rhythms also, but yours are not uniform. Since there's no night in Bazookadar, no external rhythm in your environment forces uniformity. Now, having a uniform sleeping-and -waking cycle would not do you any harm in your inner-world existence; but for those of your people who will spend long periods of time on the Freesoil exterior, it would be well if you awaken around the same time each morning as everyone else in your time zone."

"Time zones" and "morning" were among the novelties which this young woman would need to assimilate.
 
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To refresh my readers: Slick Mudpackis, the former Dark Headgear, is married to Krayzee Fireflaw, the former space pirate who eventually also acquired Fuss powers. Joining the Freesoilers in fighting off the monstrous Creepycrawlids had been a crucial nudge for them in the direction of converting to goodness. Their old homeworld of Spacebull, which had once threatened Planet Directvideo with genocide (which was thwarted by Groan Starr), was itself now purged of evil badness. Thus, the now-up-sider couple had access to Spacebullion science.

Eleven Freesoil days before the dialogues in the previous post, the Mudpackises had flown to their former planet of residence to request assorted components for various hard-to-replace items of machinery important to their colony. Spacebull now being friendly to the Directvidean star system, acquaintances were able to inform Slick and Krayzee that Rabbishop Malarkey and Duke Diskoduck were now all the way off in the Third Galaxy. No one on Spacebull had enough star-charting to travel specifically to Redundantworld, even at Ludicrous Velocity; and nobody was available who had enough connection to those events to use the retroactive time-scanner. Still, the Fuss-wielding spouses agreed that if the opportunity arose, they would go to the Third Galaxy and aid the Duke and the Rabbishop.
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

"Whenever possible, we set the ends of diagonal braces in spots where limbs are forked closely together at their point of outgrowth from the trunk. This way, future growth of the tree will grip and strengthen the bottom contact point of each brace."

At a different location from where Tarp Kanvas was talking with Antilacor, a Bazookadaran man from a part of the inner world very far from Rugdamont, a broad-shouldered carpenter named Yunak, was teaching young "outside" men his tribe's methods of treetop construction. Another "converted" Wingdinger, Dodrabusk by name, was using his telepathy to facilitate communication just as John Cardsharper was doing. The most diligent of the construction learners was a teenager, Wesley Pollock.

Vividly imagining the scaffolds which Bazookadarans presumably employed for this procedure, Wesley spoke up: "Sir, you are more modern than you realize! On many worlds, Enormous bridges are built using the same principle you describe."

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

On Redundantworld, the Anoxian super-seer Winkyblue stood beside She-Wow, randomly looking at various heroes gathering under a circus-like tent for a meal. All at once, She-Wow noticed her friend going alert, like a military guard dog.

"What is it, Winky?"

"An aura of sorts, Your Majesty. Do you see Diskoduck and Malarkey standing in line over there?"

"Yes; are they emanating the aura?"

"No, the aura seems to be LOOKING FOR them. I don't believe it to be evil; I think it represents good-aligned persons who know Diskoduck and Malarkey. I urge Your Majesty to contact Astrosmeller, and ask him to bring those strangers here if he finds them truly to be on the side of good."
 
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Readers should assume that the Mudpackises will get their wish, and that Exmaknor the up-sider will have an intuition from The Fuss, explaining where Slick and Krayzee went and why. But I'll stay on Freesoil for a bit longer, to depict some events which would have happened the same way if Slick and Krayzee had not left the Milky Way Galaxy.

A ship from Federal Earth (home of the Starship Grunts) came to Freesoil. Persons of significance arriving on this ship were Juan Ricosuave, his wife the former Lizzy Florist, and the formerly-evil Awkwardlispian scientist named Greensodd. Juan and Lizzy were now reservists, employed as consultants to space-freight companies. Conditions in this galactic sector were calm enough that the Ricosuaves had brought along their twin preschoolers, Lester and Juanita. Their business was to confer with Tarp Kanvas about whether the local populations would have any problem with a galactic trading post being established on Freesoil. In preliminary communications enroute, Greensodd was quick to state that the trading post, if approved, would pay generous fees to be allowed to do business.

While Greensodd was bringing more Freesoilers into the discussion of a trading post, Juan and Lizzy introduced their children to some of the other Pseudo-Martians. A female named Borlu showed the liveliest curiosity. "My Pseudo-Martian telepathy tells me that you folks have information about ......OTHER beings like us?"

"Yes, we do," Juan assured her. "King Truthside on Awkwardlisp has his own cosmic surveillance, and has identified a world which had never been of any importance to him. Called Gagspoon, and its people are an exact genetic match for you. They were formerly oppressed by a supervillain called Skamartistor, who is now deceased. Since a hero called Mighty Male slew Skamartistor in a fair fight, the Gagspooners have been surviving, but not fabulously. Truthside can generate wormholes, by which the Gagspooners can migrate to Freesoil-- if the Freesoilers are willing to integrate them."

Borlu looked uneasy. "We have plenty of room. But can those others endure the Earth-level gravity here?"

Now Lizzy provided the answer. "Truthside says he can program his wormholes to strengthen Gagspooners in transit, so they'll arrive on Freesoil able to move and exert themselves without distress, just like you."

Borlu mused: "It all seems wonderful. Suddenly, I feel as if I were a character in a story whose author loves happy endings."

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Truthside needed to allocate part of his attention to controlling the Kaijusaurus. His second wife, I remind everybody, was named Whiskey; she's a variant of Whitney Houston. Born on Earth-Whichever where the Thumpercolts were now the resident hero-team, Whiskey had been granted magic in (logically enough) her voice. As long as she kept singing, even faintly, she was absolutely indestructible; and her voice would also strengthen any nearby friends. To facilitate her eventual marriage with Preston Vincent Truthside, she had also been made much taller, while retaining her perfect figure.

When the zoom-tube opened its outer end on Freesoil, Slick and Krayzee Headgear knew to step into it. She made sure the dimensional tube realigned correctly afterwards, and brought the up-sider couple to a spot where, stepping out on Redundantworld, they would find themselves within sight of Diskoduck and Malarkey. Before departing, Whiskey sang an upbeat song which removed all weariness from those hearing her. At the last minute, Diskoduck entrusted Whiskey with a hand-written letter to his astronaut wife, Wilma Dearthing. It would reach Wilma eventually.

Before delivering that love letter to Planet Directvideo, Whiskey oversaw delivering a Pseudo-Martian delegation to Gagspoon. Tarp Kanvas naturally led this outreach team, while Abner Littleton back on Freesoil organized a formal welcome. In the event, nearly a third of Gagspoon's population opted to relocate to Freesoil.
 
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Scientists and engineers from the Human Federation came to join Greensodd and the Ricosuave family. A few of these were to participate in the already-proposed commercial development; the rest had not let anyone back home know their true purpose.

The latter contingent didn't reveal more than they had to, even with Freesoilers. John Cardsharper was able to reassure his neighbors that the secrecy was not hiding any designs harmful to this unique outside-and-inside world; but the "mystery people" among the visitors had been programmed NOT TO THINK ABOUT their mission until some planned stimulus reopened their memories.

In the end, the memory key was anticlimactically simple: the set-apart people remembered their mission as soon as Trampelfar escorted them down inside Bazookadar..... and they saw the Central Sun with their own eyes. One of them, a woman named Ilzani Karim, turned at once toward the King of Rugdamont. Meaning no disrespect, only unaccustomed to addressing a monarch, she exclaimed: "Mister Trampelfar! You don't know what makes your underground miniature star shine; but we believe WE DO KNOW the source."

The Tarzan-like hero (based on Edgar Rice Burroughs' less-remembered protagonist Tanar of Pellucidar) replied: "All the generations who have lived in Bazookadar never questioned our Central Sun; we never knew any other sky than a sky with land visible ALL around. Obviously, the stars you know are not the same as our sun; so how does ours come to exist?"

Ilzani drew a long breath. "You have seen that Freesoil homes have-- tubes which supply them with water from rivers and lakes. Freesoilers, and people in many worlds-- have the same arrangement, and they never question it. You also have learned that, in the outside skies, it is possible for some people to go from place to place rapidly, without being seen by anyone else until they arrive. If our belief is correct, there is a star SOMEWHERE...... from which some of its light travels unnoticed, like the water in pipes, to EMERGE in the center of your inside sky. Just enough to light your inside world, without consuming it."

Trampelfar frowned in thought. "Then-- if some huge evil tampered with the star which is like a spring, which feeds warmth and light to our Bazookadar, then the source could be made to overflow, to flood us, but with consuming heat, maybe killing every living creature in here."

Ilzani hung her head. "If that happened, everyone in the OUTSIDE world, in Freesoil, would also be wiped out."

"Do not be shamefaced, wise woman. If such a peril exists, you and your tribefellows did not create it. And I am certain that any studying you do in Bazookadar will be planned so as not to make the Central Sun hotter."

She lifted her eyes again. "Of course. Without in any way penetrating your sun, our study of its color may give us a sign of what faraway star provides the light. If that star has any inhabited worlds near it, the people there might even have created the secret stream of light into your inner sky."

"I of course know by now that people exist who can do things beyond my understanding. There is some comfort in realizing that not all such learned beings are cruel destroyers."
 
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By the time Copperfox finished editing the above post, Brandy Carranza in the Chicago of Original Earth had read "Spacebullies" as far as the point where the Exquisite She-Hunk, herself already cured of selfish bitterness, helped the War Witch Tapidri Drifla to come over to the side of good. Brandy could not liken Reverend Mother Elizabeth to the She-Hunk who MARRIED the Unfindable Man; but the concept of redemption was being displayed in a new light by means of a fantasy tale.
 
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\\\\\\\\ We will rejoin crooked politician Ladora Greeley, monster Fin-Zin-Chin-Pin, and Heart-Sapphire Deezla Vozard, who has been anointed by Yoga-Rug to convert one evil person to goodness. /// Theda Kirby, sister of Chang-Shi Kirby, is investigating the monster's actions.
 
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