She sighed. "I dont know." She looked away. It was the honest answer, she didnt. She forced a smile. "I'm used to it." She said, though she wasnt from him. "I have to practice let's just go downstairs."
"No that's what I meant I promise." She said. "It's nothing I cant handle." She said forcing a smile. "It's not you're fault.....well today was.." she said actually smiling a little. "...but it's all my fault." She admitted.
"You can handle it?" he sounded so...disgusted but not with her. had he inadvertantly put her though so much? he looked away then back to her, "Is that what I've been...what this has been, you handeling our frendship because I was too ideotic to even notice that my best frind liked me in that way?"
She glared up at him, his voice was dripping with disgust. "I didnt say you were a burden." She said sharply. "James this is so messed up." She said beginning to cry, she was so overwhelmed. She began to sink down onto the ground. "I'm sorry." She whispered.
"I'm sorry," he muttered, "I'm doing it agian." he said reffuring to the hug. what was wrong with him. of course she had been reading into his actions...any girl would have, "I'll see you around." he said forcing a smile as he walked back inside.
She sighed and sank onto the ground put her head between her knees and cried. After about ten minutes she stood and went downstairs to see if he was waiting, and still willing to help her.
he suddenly stopped and shut off the music he had been playing, "I'm sorry, I'm taking up the dance floor." he forced a week smile, "I'll leave you to your geniouse work." he said picking up his hat and heading for the door
"You aren't going to help me?" She asked then glanced in the mirror her hair was curly and messy and her eyes were red. She sighed, she looked horrible. No wonder he didnt feelthesameway about her. She went to pull her hair up, but decided it didnt matter, it wouldnt help, she looked like a train wreck. "You dont have to stay, I mean I wouldnt blame you if you left." She said as she walked over to her bag and pulled out her cd, and the clothes she usually practiced in.
James stopped at the door and turned around, "do you think I'm leaving becaus I want to?" he asked stepping back in to the srudio, "why do you think I'm going?"
"I do," he said walking up to her, "I want to help more than anything right now but the last thing I want to do is make you have to deal with me. to deal with not feeling things or whatever. to deal with my stupidity. I don't wnat to hurt you anymore than I have already."