Write a note to the person above you II

Dear Frecklesnoogie,

You shouldn't give me bad ideas that you already gave me, because I'll probably act on them the second time.

Couch and sofa are interchangable, at least in my family. Dunno about everyone else. According to my mother, several means about three, but not everyone agrees with my mother. As you can see, Americans are confused. And don't get me started on people who pronounce "hawk" and "hock" the same way.

You know, there's a lotion available for those dinosaur scales of yours. The advertisements say it will make your skin "nice and smooth, just like an amphibian's!"

Sincerely,
Glen
 
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Dear Glenblueberrypie,

Thank you for your opinions and research on my lexical enquiries. Let's spread the mantle of silence over everything else.

I was wondering about "several" because you have the word "couple" which I was never sure if it always meant "two" or could also mean "two or more but probably less than ten" (which is the meaning the corresponding word "a pair" has in German, ironically). And "several" sounds like more than two. It also sounds like a character from Harry Potter whom everyone loves for being a hero but no one would want a selfie with in real life. Actually, I'm not sure about that anymore. People are getting stupider with every minute wasted on facebook. I'm so glad I spend my time on TDL, getting an education, and getting paid a lot of money by Glen's mom for giving her something better to do than loitering in front of supermarkets and going to parties in unused storehouses.

Please note that the previous paragraph should not be used as an example for a paragraph in an undergrad college class.

Sincerely,
Frex
 
Dear Frecklesburg,

A couple does literally mean two, although sometimes people use the numerical meaning of the term rather loosely when referring to how many cheese crackers they want. Cheese has that effect on people.

Personally, I'm not much for photos and therefore would not want to get one with Snape--or anyone else. In any case, Draco seems to be the one most of the fangirly types would want their picture taken with. Snape doesn't sound so bad now, does he?

Sincerely,
Glen
 
Dear Glenbuxtehude,

Draco is kind of fabulous - I'd take a picture with him. To be honest, I don't remember much about him other than his being a blonde.

In other news, a mosquito has chosen my room for hibernation, and my blood for nourishment. If this doesn't stop, I'll hire the DLF as my personal bodyguard. Can you give me his contact details?

Sincerely,
Frecks III of Frecklesburg
 
Your Majesty Frecks III:

WHAT ARE YOU NOW, PRUSSIAN?!

Never mind, you don't have to answer that. You could try choosing more modest names in the future, however.

Sincerely,
Glen
 
Dear Glenbarista,

Contrary to popular belief, anger is not a Prussian virtue. And anyway, you were the one who started with 'Frecklesburg' and all that. We are puzzled by your latest title as well as a little disappointed that all the fun that We had incognito on the internet has to come to an end now that Our identity has been revealed.

You may be assured that you will receive your just deserts. With cacti.

Sincerely,
Her Royal Majesty etc. etc.
 
Your Majesty Frecks III:

Cacti aren't native to Prussia. Couldn't you at least be a dignified traditional monarch, rather than a spiky one?

Sincerely,
Glen
 
Your Majesty Frecks III,

Actually, I have one stuck on my arm at the moment. It's very painful. The doctor says he will remove it as soon as the swelling goes down.

Sincerely,
Glen
 
Dear Ms Burne,

We would like to inform you that although your health insurance covers spiky helmet incidents, the insurance of the Prussian attached to you does not. Since we never give anyone the benefit of doubt, help, or clean bandages if we can help it, we kindly ask you to vacate the premises of the IA hospital ASAPWACPOYA.

Kind regards,
Dr Lentokonesuihkuturbiinimoottoriapumekaanikkoaliupseerioppilas
 
Dear Dr. L-whatever,

But I'm in too much pain! I can't move! And if you pull the Prussian out of the helmet, you can throw him out by himself. He's worried that he won't finish writing all of his scheduled regulations if he doesn't get home soon, anyway.

Sinc--ow! ow! ow!

Gle-OW!
 
Dear Ms Burne,

okay fine, we'll take the helmet off and do all the proper medical stuff under the condition that you let us tattoo our new Christmas-themed ad on your forehead. It'll be out of date very quickly but for what it's worth...

Sincerely,
Dr Lentokonesuihkuturbiinimoottoriapumekaanikkoaliupseerioppilas

PS. And the seal goes OW OW OW but there's one sound that no one kno-hows...
 
Dr L owowowowowow

You can't put anything on my forehead ever ow and the Prussian is now OW out of the helmet and is stalking you ow you deserve it.....................

Hey! That white light looks like candy, I want to eat it. *eats light* I feel much better.

Sincerely,
Glen
 
Dear Freckles,

How do you survive in the winter without the sun to enhance your freckles?

Sincerely,
A Concerned GG
 
My dear GG,

Actually, the freckles were a gift from Lady Callandra. I usually keep them in a glass clase in the living room and only wear them on special occasions, so winter is not that much of a trial to me. But thank you for your kind concern. You're very welcome to come look at my freckles, but don't try to eat them. I would have to admonish you severely.

Sincerely
Freckles
 
Dear Freckles,

You've now pointed out to GG that she can eat your freckles without alerting you. I suggest you carry them to work with you from now on.

Sincerely,
Glen
 
Dear GG,

I want to research said occasion but I can't. Why? Why can't we search the forum anymore? What does it hide? Is it Fluffy? Is it the Tesseract? Is it a shrink ray?

Crying big crocodile tears,
Freckles
 
Dear Freckles,

I don't know, but it's severely limiting what I can do with my mod powers.

But I will say that GG has eaten the universe before--probably multiple times--and that would presumably include everything in it, i.e. your freckles. Sorry,

But quit it with the tears,
Glen
 
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