Attention-Deficit Roleplaying

Meanwhile, in Corneria, Peppy Hare was attending to his candy shop when he heard another high pitched sound coming from his hand made Space Scanner. Upon studying the annoying signal, he realized that it was coming from some desert world in another Galaxy, somewhere in the vicinity of Planet Spaceballs.

"What the....!" is all that Peppy Hare could say because his scanner was made with cheap electronic components that he bought at Radio Hut for 9.99 space bucks. But Peppy would have been surprised had he known who was sending such powerful signal.

-----------

In the desert moon of Vega, Barf the Mawg collapsed from exhaustion due to having to carry Princess Vespa's Industrial-Strength Hair Dryer for at least 20 miles. As everyone knows, when Princess Vespa was told to bring "only what you need to survive," the first think she packed was the darn dryer. By this time both Barf and Vespa, along with Lone Star, were already collapsing from heat stroke, having traveled many miles through scorching desert trying to get away from evil (and stupid) President Skroob.

Upon collapsing on the sand, Barf's Man-Dog (Mawg) whistle automatically began emitting the high pitched sound that Peppy Hare noticed on his cheap scanner many, many light years away.
 
Last edited:
At that moment- CRASH! The DeLorean time machine crashed through the whole miraculously harming no one but the computers in the room. Doc Brown opened the doors and shouted to Samson and David, "Come quick! We've got to get you home to the past!" Before anyone could respond, the Biblical heroes quickly dove into the DeLorean as Doc backed it out of the police station. The car then took off into the air, and disappeared, presumably delivering the Biblical figures back to their appropriate time... Or did it?

Meanwhile, owing to a defect in the DeLorean time machine, it had been transported to the future, at a time when the earth had been invaded by an alien race from the planet Skaro. Doc Brown was so excited at what he could see, that he immediately forgot what he was supposed to be doing and, after David and Samson had climbed out of the car explained that they were going to explore this strange world. They had just agreed on the direction they should go, when a Dalek came around the corner. Upon seeing them it screeched, "Identify yourselves or you will be exterminated!" In reply Samson
 
-- grabbed up the Dalek and smashed it to pieces, roaring, "I don't go by your Doctor Who rules that ONLY allow the BAD guys ever to do any butt-kicking!"
 
The Doctor showed up, looking distressed, and called out to David and Samson: "Don't you see that this violence makes you NO BETTER than the Daleks?"

David and Samson looked at each other, paused one beat, then both replied, "Naaaaaahhh."
 
For no reason at all, Captain Obvious was walking by the area where, just hours ago, Samsom had kicked Dalek butt. There were still pieces of cheap looking metal strewn around along with some wires and other debris. As Captain Obvious walked and wondered what cheap special effects crew could conceive such thing, his left foot suddenly stepped onto something squishy.

"Eew! EeW!" Said Captain Obvious, as he began jumping on his right foot towards a patch of grass nearby. "Dalek brain, Dalek brain! Eeew!"

As he wiped the brain matter off his boot on the patch of grass, Captain Obvious looked at the moist and squishy puddle, pointed to it, and said:

"You SHALL NOT BE MY SQUISHY! EW!"
 
Robin Hood happened to show up in this strange place by stepping through a time portal. He noticed another Dalek chasing a little boy through the town, and promptly took out the monster with an arrow.
 
.....or thought he had. Unfortunately for him, unlike the Sheriff of Nottingham's guards, Dalek casings are arrow-proof. The Dalek swung around to Robin Hood, screeching "Exterminate!" and prepared to fire at the Outlaw leader, who
 
.....or thought he had. Unfortunately for him, unlike the Sheriff of Nottingham's guards, Dalek casings are arrow-proof. The Dalek swung around to Robin Hood, screeching "Exterminate!" and prepared to fire at the Outlaw leader, who

drew his sword, and with a mighty swing slashed the monster's head off. This was perfectly possible because the Dalek's armor was very thin to non existent around its neck, while also a high-powered sword swing CAN cut through some forms of metal.
 
Upon seeing the remains of the 'living' part of the Dalek, now very much dead of course, Robin Hood

....held his nose, then beckoned the Doctor to his side. "Here, wise man," said Robin, "you may dislike technically-advanced weapons, but surely medieval ones do not upset you so much. For one thing, you yourself have fought and won swordfights in your earlier incarnations; and in one of your encounters with the Sontaarans, an archer friend of yours killed a Sontaaran. So how about providing ME with some Dalek-piercing arrows?"

"Oh, all right," replied the Doctor. Then he--
 
opened his suitcase and handed Robin a stack of arrows that seemingly had no heads on them. "Just push the switch on the side down toward the end, and it makes a plasma-laser-arrowhead-thingy on the tip. Just make sure you always activate them before firing, otherwise, they won't work at all."
 
Robin was confused by all those instructions, and declined to use them, opting instead for old-fashioned traditional arrows. They worked better anyway, and he was able to defeat the Greeks in the battle of Thermopylae. The reason that he was in ancient Persia was because...
 
Since Robin had forgotten the special arrows, the character of Rohrshach from the movie "Watchmen" retrieved them. Seeing the Doctor still hanging around, Rohrshach remarked to the Gallifreyan, "Since I was the only character in my idiotic movie who knew his elbow from his ear, I'm going to take these back to my dimension, and ACTUALLY do some good with them -- as opposed to Doctor Manhattan's gibberish about the universal cosmos of the cosmic universe."
 
After cleaning Dalek brain from his boot, Captain Obvious was berating himself for not paying attention while walking through the remains of the Dalek. But it wasn't his fault really. It's just that seconds before stepping on the squishy mess, something that look strangely like a toilet plunger had gotten his attention and he had stepped in it's direction without looking.

Be that as it may, Captain Obvious was now wondering if he would have to join that sappy quartet known as The Three Klutzateers.

"I wonder if they'll accept a fifth member," Captain Obvious said to himself in a resigned tone.
 
"Of course they won't!" said a silky voice behind him. Turning, Captain Obvios saw he was being addressed by a gentleman wearing red robes. "However, I can offer a man of your obvious talents a commission in my personal guard." Captain Obvious
 
, being very disturbed at the moment, screamed "ROBES!!", and ran for his life.

Meanwhile a velociraptor who hadn't eaten a self-absorbed and vain vampire was wandering about New York City. Lots of people were staring at him because, of course, he was a dinosaur in New York City.
 
Last edited:
Mayor Bloomberg approached the Velociraptor and scolded him: "You're not allowed to have those claws, only agents of government are allowed to have claws!"
 
Back
Top