Attention-Deficit Roleplaying

Agent Coulson also used a device that erased the memories of any eye-witnesses and made them think they were just performance art piece.

The plane took off for the Cayman Islands. Already the passengers were rendered in a comatose state.However, it would not be an easy flight.
"Wash, Mr. MCQuack," said Worf. "I am detecting some kind of atmospheric turbulence up ahead."
 
The turbulent air was originating from the ground: from a certain incompetent, corrupt imbecile who had no clue how to do anything constructive, but who nonetheless insisted on giving another meaningless speech.
 
The air was so turbulent it woke the passengers from their stupor.

'"A few people is one thing," said Ramandu's daughter. " But several hundred is another."

Wash, Launchpad, Ramandu's daughter Worf had to call on the expertise of Leslie Nielson's doctor character from the movie Airplane!

"Surley, you must have an idea," said Wash.
 
"Yes, I do." The Leslie Nielsen character got the attention of the passengers and told them, "Ladies and gentlemen, the turbulence you're experiencing is caused by a dishonest and stupid speech being made on the ground. YOU YOURSELVES can help the plane get through safely, by creating a counter-force. I want all of you to start improvising speeches that are EVEN MORE STUPID."

The passengers rose to the occasion, and began babbling a flood of nonsense. Ramandu's daughter noticed that, in many of the speeches, the most ridiculous ideas were accompanied by words about "following your heart."
 
Then he turned to Wash and Launchpad and said, "And stop calling me Shirley."


The High School students who had fallen asleep in a basic freshman English class had trouble making coherent statements in their speeches as they tended to just abbreviate things into Text jargon like 'LOLZ'.
 
Meanwhile, time was running short. Cayman the CREATURE, not Cayman the ISLANDS, began stirring from its nap, vaguely beginning to think about devouring screaming victims. It figured that if it did this well enough, it might be able to star in a TV movie called "Caymanado" on the SyFy Channel (formerly Sci-Fi, but changed in order to accommodate the same dopey kids who were on the airliner.).
 
Gordon Lightfoot was on the airplane and magically aware of the stirrings of Cayman, prompting him to improvise this song as he sang and played his guitar.
"The legend lives on how the airplane went down
with the lady they call Ramandu's daughter!"
 
The cosmic lady known to some as Liliandil added to the improvisation:

"We've got to go fight that huge crocodile type,
Before it escapes to the water!"
 
Wash sand,
" The thing swims like an otter,
and smells like a rotter."

Qui-Gon sang on the radio,
"If we're not careful
well all be... Bantha Fodder."

Worf sang a few bars too but they were in Klingon and they loose something in translation.

The singing was just enough to stabilize the plan and bring them closer to their landing sight.
 
What was let loose in the translation process of Worf's singing happened to be several sea-dwelling reptiles from Jurassic Park. A pod of plesiosaurs and a couple of mosasaurs to name just a small number of them.
 
Unbeknownst to Worf, John Hammond was actually a huge Trekker and programmed the voice activation passwords for the holding bays for the aquatic dinosaurs in Klingon.
 
Tyrannosaurus Mex showed up, complete with his Mariachi Band in their classical black and white outfits and decided that it would be a good idea to teach La Cucaracha, La Bamba, and their newest hit, La Vulcana to Worf and company in order to complement their rhythm-lacking battle grunts.
 
The music started a frenzy. The mosasaurs and plesiosaurs, along with the giant Cayman who had been the original concern of the formerly-dead heroes, all began randomly attacking each other.
 
The plane came for a landing and unknown to anyone... Klingons hate mariachi music. It actually makes them even angrier then usual. They are also not fond of sombreros ( try finding any hat that can fit a Klingon) and tacos .They do however love bean burritos.

Worf flew into a rage and killed the Cayman lizard upon seeing it.
 
Agent Coulson gobbled up every taco in sight, offering the justification that he was preventing Worf from going crazy at the sight of tacos.
 
Coulson had gained a lot of experience in eating a large quantity of food in a short time, having bested Thor at least three times in an eating contest.
 
But he could not best the superior eating power of the greatest eater who ever lived... Fat Albert.
Bill Cosby announced that a burrito-eating contest would soon begin, and offered the question, "Is it possible that maybe, just maybe, someone will replace Fat Albert as the reigning champion this year?"
Fat Albert replied with a hearty, "Hey hey hey! I'd sure like to put that to the test!"
 
Cookie Monster said, " While me still am Cookie Monster, parents complained that me make their kids fat, and instead of teaching healthy habits at home demand that I teach them. So me have learned value of sometimes foods. And guess what... this time is burrito time. Cowabunga!"
 
"Excellent! Awesome!" Said the turtles when they arrived, but their excitement died down really quick when they realized there were not pork rinds to go with their tacos and burritos.
 
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