Debate on the Healthiness of Fangirlism

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I guess you could say I'm a fangirl...not of WM and SK but just of Narnia. I used to spend 24-7 on this site talking and I loved it...but then I found that I wasn't with my family...so now instead of my obsession controling what the family does, my family controls what we do. I used to not want to do anything but this, then I started slipping away, I found that you should have time for both family and obsession. It should be equal, and if it is unequal, the bigger part of attention should be in the family, friends and real life...thats just what I found out...the super hard way.
 
fawkes777 said:
All right, I'm trying to remain calm about this comment you just made, Paravel. No one said that you are not giving the right answers. No one. Nadie. NO ONE. NO ONE. Find that post, please find it for me, and post it right after this. PLEASE, I'd very much like to see it!!!

I see a great deal of things that are unproductive about IceMaiden's comment, whether you think so or not. Just because we started a debate on a topic that may be touchy to others DOES NOT automatically mean that we are just guys who are "jealous" because other celebrities get attention. I think it's rather sad that you have to resort to that level of thinking to come back with a retaliation.
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I am quoting this post because it is an example of you stating that IceMaiden is not giving the right answers. In a debate, someone is allowed to ask a relating question to topic, such as: Is it possible that you are jealous of the attention given to Will and Skandar in these threads? If it's not true, then post it's not true and go from, but it is not a "lower level of thinking". That is an insult and you see where its gotten you so far. Your post is exactly what I'm talking about.

And Jack D. as well as fawkes777, I think what IceMaiden is trying to say is that people have different interests; perhaps you like something I would find unproductive or silly. And that is not anything to be defensive about, it's just the truth. People understand things differently according to who they are and how they approach life. So, I'm sorry that you took offense to what I posted, but it's true that you seem to have an unhealthy interest in something you don't consider worth anyone's time.
 
Paravel25 said:
I'm sorry but you seem to like to condescend to people on this thread about making 'unproductive comments'. I see nothing unproductive about IceMaiden's question to you. Why do you care? People have explained why the Willianites/Skandarnites exist, that it doesn't take up all their lives and that it's really their business. And if the posts are sounding the same because people are agreeing with each other, maybe you should accept it as your answer to the question from those who would know. Since you guys claim to be mystified and started the thread, how can you tell us we're not giving you the right answer. You have your answers, you just don't like them and that's fine.
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And yes, I do, because unproductive comments are what other threads in this forum are for.
 
Paravel25 said:
I am quoting this post because it is an example of you stating that IceMaiden is not giving the right answers. In a debate, someone is allowed to ask a relating question to topic, such as: Is it possible that you are jealous of the attention given to Will and Skandar in these threads? If it's not true, then post it's not true and go from, but it is not a "lower level of thinking". That is an insult and you see where its gotten you so far. Your post is exactly what I'm talking about.

And Jack D. as well as fawkes777, I think what IceMaiden is trying to say is that people have different interests; perhaps you like something I would find unproductive or silly. And that is not anything to be defensive about, it's just the truth. People understand things differently according to who they are and how they approach life. So, I'm sorry that you took offense to what I posted, but it's true that you seem to have an unhealthy interest in something you don't consider worth anyone's time.
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But can't you agree, Paravel, that there is a definite difference between what is productive and what isn't, regardless of opinion?
 
JackD said:
Well, mostly the only people I see agreeing with 'it's not unhealthy' are people that are nites themselves. And I see a lot of people saying 'it's not healthy, but it's fun/pleasurable, and we have the right to do it!'
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And I see that most of the ones saying that it is unhealthy are the men. :rolleyes:
 
fawkes777 said:
Hey, by any chance, did you read that snippet smokeonthewater posted about a girl expressing her feelings on the matter?
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Yes, and that is just an opinion. I would know if Im unhealthy or not, seeing as I just came back from the physchologist. :rolleyes:
When you're anorexic (which is my situation), you usually grasp anything that would help to cure you (in this case an obsession with Skandar. I have OCD, just in case no one knew:rolleyes: ) of the eating disorder. If it's Skandar, then so be it.
 
♣Teh Deviant♣ said:
Yes, and that is just an opinion. I would know if Im unhealthy or not, seeing as I just came back from the physchologist. :rolleyes:
When you're anorexic (which is my situation), you usually grasp anything that would help to cure you (in this case an obsession with Skandar. I have OCD, just in case no one knew:rolleyes: ) of the eating disorder. If it's Skandar, then so be it.
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I'm sorry, but I find that to be a weak argument. You're making it sound as though your grasping on to Skandar is the only cure to your problems. There are other ways to do that than doing things in the name of a celebrity you don't even know. Seriously, why can't you do those things in the name of your parents or siblings, why Skandar?
 
Asphodel said:
I'm sorry, but I find that to be a weak argument. You're making it sound as though your grasping on to Skandar is the only cure to your problems. There are other ways to do that than doing things in the name of a celebrity you don't even know. Seriously, why can't you do those things in the name of your parents or siblings, why Skandar?
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Im not doing that, Im only giving it as an example.
 
tinman said:
IceMaiden, how old are you?
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She was in her mid forties if I remember right. Her birthday's in her profile.

Paravel25 said:
you seem to have an unhealthy interest in something you don't consider worth anyone's time.
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We have an unhealthy interest in something we ourselves don't consider worth anyone's time???
 
JackD said:
We have an unhealthy interest in something we ourselves don't consider worth anyone's time???
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That's what I said. The topic is fangirlism, which you think is a waste of anyone's time. Correct? If it is, then you could be doing something more productive then debating this subject in this thread, by your own logic.


But can't you agree, Paravel, that there is a definite difference between what is productive and what isn't, regardless of opinion?
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I know that something that starts off as hobby without the obvious potential for "productivity" can end up introducing you to new friends, contacts, can inspire you to do something that you didn't think about before. Yes, that could happen in a 'Nite thread or any other thread on a forum. Anytime people can get together and communicate about one thing that interests them, they can usually find other common ground and build a friendship.

I don't think you always have to be producing something for the hobbies you do to have value. Sometimes you can be silly, joke around, chat about random things, and then go off and do what you do in real life. It's down time. I just think you are underestimating the value of those threads as something worthwhile. And I've already agreed that if it controls you life, then it is unhealthy. But as a part of your life, like any hobby, it can be rewarding.
 
tinman said:
IceMaiden, how old are you?
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38 years old. I just got back from work and took a peek at some of the comments that were made to my post about ' why do you care.' Well, that's the question of the day. Why do you guys care whether girls want to go a little nutty over some actors? It isn't any of your business. You started a useless thread that's now going to be locked, and Fawkes was accusing ME of making unproductive comments? He couldn't even specify which ONE of my comments was unproductive. This whole THREAD was unnecessary and unproductive because nothing was accomplished here. Simply because there WAS nothing to be gained from saying that the young women on the forum who are fans of Will and Skandar and their fandom is 'unhealthy.' What's unhealthy is when people concern themselves with issues that is no one else's business.
 
JackD said:
She was in her mid forties if I remember right. Her birthday's in her profile.



We have an unhealthy interest in something we ourselves don't consider worth anyone's time???
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Subtract some years from mid-forties and you'll get 38, because I was born in 1968.
 
Asphodel said:
I'm sorry, but I find that to be a weak argument. You're making it sound as though your grasping on to Skandar is the only cure to your problems. There are other ways to do that than doing things in the name of a celebrity you don't even know. Seriously, why can't you do those things in the name of your parents or siblings, why Skandar?
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I don't think that's what she meant at all. Here's my question to YOU, Asphodel. What does it matter to YOU if she's using a celebrity ( if indeed that IS even the case) to cure or assist some of her problems instead of her family? Why is this any of your business how a young woman wants to relate to celebrities versus relating to her family? You don't know that she doesn't 'grasp onto' her family for support...and if she feels fandom for Skandar is making her life a little happier and better, then you should be glad for her, not try to make her feel worse about it.


And can you answer even one question for me, A? WHY DO YOU CARE? WHY IS THIS ANY OF YOUR BUSINESS? If you were so CONCERNED about the issues with young women here and fandom, why wait so long to 'express' these 'concerns' when the fan clubs and fan sections for Will and Skandar have been here for a long, long time? Is this a SUDDEN concern of yours for some reason?
 
Paravel25 said:
I am quoting this post because it is an example of you stating that IceMaiden is not giving the right answers. In a debate, someone is allowed to ask a relating question to topic, such as: Is it possible that you are jealous of the attention given to Will and Skandar in these threads? If it's not true, then post it's not true and go from, but it is not a "lower level of thinking". That is an insult and you see where its gotten you so far. Your post is exactly what I'm talking about.

And Jack D. as well as fawkes777, I think what IceMaiden is trying to say is that people have different interests; perhaps you like something I would find unproductive or silly. And that is not anything to be defensive about, it's just the truth. People understand things differently according to who they are and how they approach life. So, I'm sorry that you took offense to what I posted, but it's true that you seem to have an unhealthy interest in something you don't consider worth anyone's time.
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Thank you, Paravel. I keep getting accused of posting something that was so horrible that it obviously raised the point...why are some of these young guys here so bothered by the possibility that they might be jealous in some ways? Would they feel the same way about celebrity and fan girls if they were in the same shoes as Will or Skandar? Probably not.

And then I'm accused...goodness...of 'not giving the right answers.' Answers to WHAT? The 'idea' that the girls' fandom here is 'unhealthy?' I stated all my reasons quite clearly as to why I felt their fandom was NOT unhealthy in any way, and was a perfectly normal part of being a young girl who enjoys handsome young male actors' looks and character as well as their acting. What answers do you want me to give?
 
IceMaiden said:
38 years old. I just got back from work and took a peek at some of the comments that were made to my post about ' why do you care.' Well, that's the question of the day. Why do you guys care whether girls want to go a little nutty over some actors? It isn't any of your business. You started a useless thread that's now going to be locked, and Fawkes was accusing ME of making unproductive comments? He couldn't even specify which ONE of my comments was unproductive. This whole THREAD was unnecessary and unproductive because nothing was accomplished here. Simply because there WAS nothing to be gained from saying that the young women on the forum who are fans of Will and Skandar and their fandom is 'unhealthy.' What's unhealthy is when people concern themselves with issues that is no one else's business.
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ThankYou so much!!!!! I totally agree. I do hope this thread gets locked :D.
 
fawkes777 said:
No, I don't think any of us need to lighten up. I'm sick of people making unproductive comments like that so they can all "agree with each other 500%" or whatever. It really does get annoying when we're just trying to have a discussion.
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But don't you want us to agree with you 500%? :cool:

I'm all for Fangirlism. Young girls are wanting and trying to grow up so quick these days that I find those who are Fangirls are more down to earth than those who are going out with a different "guy" every week, or getting their heart broken, or getting into an argument with their parents because they can't go to the "coolest" party of the year etc...etc.....I'm glad I'm done with those days! I can finally take a stand and just be myself whether the world thinks I'm cool or not.
 
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