Spacebullies Two: The Search For More Parody

[Copperfox]

In the eastern Colorado of Bat-Earth, the Native American stunt rider Shirley Digs-Many-Roots was continuing the job of integrating diverse talents for the planned humane rodeo, supported by Deuce Wayan's brother Ben. During this time, the one and only recording studio in Lincoln, Nebraska hosted the rising pop star Maxie Viva; also the composer Pryor Feldon, who had written background music for "The Taming of the Street Brat." Washday Anagram, her green-haired enabler Sybil Dampning, and Interior Secretary Ladora Greeley watched and listened while the band Kuan-Yin Artemis played, and Maxie sang her latest song, one with a harder beat than most of her tunes.

"I see a red man, and a white man, and a black;
Their color doesn't matter as I turn my back.
I see my posse girls-- (looking at Washday) --dressed in their yoga pants;
We all agree that cavemen don't deserve a chance....."
. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

More with Washday and Maxie later. At this time, it was night in the Union of Cooperative Collective Republics. At the zoological research station close to the city of Omsk, in the eastern reaches of Siberia, Lavrenty Borisovich Bakunin was, cough cough, enjoying the company of his Yakut girlfriend Nariyana Aytalovna Keskil. She was the witness whom he had brought to see the enhanced reindeer fawn at the secret biochemistry station.

"Lavrenty, prekrasny lyubovnik,I can't help wondering: what will become of Zaznoba when the project moves to a later stage." She was referring to the somatically altered young reindeer she had met.

"Not to worry, golubka. No one will turn her into venison sausage. They'll hide her in plain sight. Precisely because she's so tame and friendly, she can live with one or another of the researchers. If they create the end product they hope for, she'll never be notorious. She should have a happy life in obscurity-- probably longer than her species norm-- while the main actor in the play gets the attention."

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

Pavel Orlov was one of the leading biochemists in the gas-well-bacteria-usage project. He answered only to Doctor Yevdokia Danilova, who held three bioscience doctorates, besides impeccable Party credentials. We find Pavel and Yevdokia two stories underground, looking into an enclosure partitioned with super-break-resistant glass. Inside, hooked up to tubes and cables like something in a monster movie, was a male polar bear-- who had been unconscious but life-supported for several days now. Being cordial coworkers, but not lovers like Lavrenty and Nariyana, they conversed in a tone at the friendly edge of stiffly formal.

"Doctor Orlov, what's your recommendation for the cell-division rate?"

"I suggest that it be accelerated by no more than six percent, with nutrient inflow increased eight percent as bones, cartilage, nerves and muscles continue growing and taking shape."

More professional discussion followed, but this much will give the idea, so I can look at other characters. Yes, a polar bear is being altered with techniques developed on the fawn Zaznoba. Yes, it will be important soon. Back to the environs of Limon, Colorado.

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

At the Audacious Angus Ranch in eastern Colorado, the fourteen girl acrobats from China had been practicing diligently with Shirley Digs-Many-Roots the Cheyenne woman. Shirley's horse was fully at ease with the slender Asians by now, and with two boys from Limon. One of these, by mere chance, had the same first name as ranch owner Benjamin Wayans. Benny Lake had carved his own pair of wooden stilts, and was pretty good at walking around on them. The other town boy, Steve Grant, owned both a dirt-track bicycle and a unicycle. He and Benny could move around well: not exactly a headliner display, but both boys could become part of the moving tapestry that Shirley and the Wayans family were planning.

Ben Wayans offered the new boys a summation of the game plan. "We want to be able to open soon. Musical acts are still being lined up. You two, and the others you're practicing with, will become the very environment for the event. This will be like a Renaissance fair, with cast members freely circulating among the patrons while highlighted acts use platform stages."

"Any more acts to sign on?" Steve asked.

"We expect a parade of purebred dogs: border collies, mountain dogs, rare terriers, and so on. This, in the lanes. A cat show too, probably; in more controlled conditions, of course."

Benny laughed at this. "One time our cat got her head stuck inside one leg of Dad's dress trousers."

 

[Copperfox]

As on Original Earth, Jinan was one of the biggest cities in central-north China, around one-third the size of Beijing. Theda Kirby, half Chinese despite her name-- sister to Chang-Shi Kirby of Street-Bat's inner circle-- had used the pretext of seeing acquaintances to make her way up to Jinan. There she met with personnel of a seismic monitoring station. There was no need to be evasive about what brought her here; the world now knew about the elemental dragon Fin-Zin-Chin-Pin. The geologists lapped up everything she could tell about the monster's non-murderous but property-damaging activity in America.

At one point, the eldest man in the station disclosed something: "We have records of movement, below the crust, over the last four days. If this was Fin-Zin-Chin-Pin, it started each time from somewhere under the Indian Ocean seabed, then snaked as far north as eight degrees latitude above us before turning back. The deep-layer paths followed latitude lines, progressing east to west."

"Is there anything known to you that the creature might be looking for?"

The geologist shrugged. "Many of us know that in legends, Fin-Zin-Chin-Pin was vanquished by the Righteous Mountain Warriors." (What he means is Bat-Earth's version of True Earth's "Water Margin" kung-fu legends.) "But no recognizable successors to those heroes exist in the world today, that the earth dragon should be scouting for their possible presence as a threat to look out for."

"Any other hypothesis?"

"The nearest guess we have is that Fin-Zin-Chin-Pin is coming just far enough north to reach out with its elemental senses. Trying to spy on something happening up in the U.C.C.R."

Neither Theda nor any of the seismologists knew anything about the animal-altering project in Omsk.

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

Back in the United States, Interior Secretary Ladora Greeley, after an enjoyable visit with President Hegel, took on more visits to the burgeoning Life Avenues. Her visits were an equal mix of giving speeches to Oneness Pioneers, attending self-criticism sessions, and play-acting as a regular person. This routine included standing in lines to be weighed for portion calculation before eating plant-based "meat" and plant-based "cheese" with organic spinach and steamed rice. It was a highlight when she presided over the opening of a new, relatively small Avenue overlapping Kansas and Oklahoma.

Mere hours after she departed from this location, she was mentally contacted by Fin-Zin-Chin-Pin, as follows: There is activity of importance in the northeastern U.C.C.R. The nature of your office in America makes it plausible for you to visit the Omsk region. There are facilities which would probably detect my subterranean approach; not that I fear anything the Russians there might do in the short term, but their activity might eventually lead to something inconvenient for me.

So, abetted by Beatrice Wayans-- who figured that Ladora's absence would mean Beatrice getting more of Mark Hegel's attention-- Ladora soon had her ticket for a flight to Siberia. Lavrenty Bakunin the researcher would guide her inspection.

This has been an insert of sorts; I need time to decide what can happen on Bat-Earth of a more thunderous nature.

 

[Copperfox]

This chapter will return to Punksteema, but not to the setting based on the Gormenghast Trilogy. I want to resume Jonawiku's adventures. We last left him and his dog Fish Hook searching for clues to new armament in lands west of Samplibam.

LOTS of stuff to refresh! I gather it haphazardly-- to KEEP it available, since my Keanu Reeves imitation has been offstage for ages.

=====>> Firstly, good-aligned characters who play, lately have played, or soon will play a role in the ronin-archer's mission:

Field-Master Nefekor, a sergeant-major equivalent in Shogun Wajitujit's army, who has received the Towerman anointing. / Odilladet Gohuhal, a former servant of the necromancer Jaheg-Jorod; she was restored to life by the Colorless Quetzalcoatl after having been a zombie for many days. Meeting Jonawiku after she was re-humanized, Odilladet informed him that Azellajo, a young kinswoman of the archer's deceased wife Shufiro, would be in peril in the near future. Odilladet is able to operate a "rattle-gun." / Zutozar, a female Tengu, whose husband had perished in battle against foes of the Shogun. She has two nephews, Butabik and Widagro, who assist Nefekor in scouting; they have become pals with Kambijud, a teenage boy from the friendly city-state called Flodmarth.

AN EXASPERATING DETAIL: I could swear that I said Jonawiku acquired an additional dog after Fish Hook, but now I can't find any post mentioning the new dog. Accordingly, if such a dog pops up somewhere back there, I decide that somehow a misplaced owner got reunited with this dog. Happy ending there.

"Fist-of-Ice," one of the leading men from Tagdoss, will encounter Jonawiku soon, accompanied by his warrior son Bronze Raven. Zakatuho, historian to Shogun Wajitujit, who can speak Tagdoss-Flodmarth, will be brought by "walk-on" Tengu at a plotline-suitable time.

Some who have heard the gospel of Jesus from Mistress Mukuma call it Krissa-Channity.

House Burakarut is hostile to the Shogun. The expert weapon-smith Neridim Yubiwaza belongs to them, and was personally prompted by Jaheg-Jorod to invent the rattle-gun.

__/***\__/***\__/***\__/***\__
---- FOR LATER ON, >AFTER< JONAWIKU HAS DONE ENOUGH AND WE >CAN< LOOK ELSEWHERE:

Labor Captain Jarsken Bowdrie, and longtime peddler Victor Shelsidan, have been busy in open country east of Lower Wenzeppu, building a permanent trading-post enterprise with plains tribes. One such tribe has a collective name which translates as "Snow Drinkers." AFTER Jarsken and Victor were last seen, Roy Crinkly from Gahurr, who had been on the side of good in the Battle of Oxhide Spring, joined them. Roy is the one with a mighty buffalo gun, and has lately added a five-shot revolver. He will have reported his becoming a Towerman.

The compact airship "Cloud Wagon," with Captain Veskamet Jolut who knows about telegraph projects, may turn up.

There are newly-created characters from the Hodsup, a tribe farther southeast, whose tribe name is untranslated: Middle-aged father Noon Runner, his lovingly-tended mother-in-law Four Cloaks, his wife Singing Tree, her sub-adult brother Dirt-In-Hair, and his fifteen-year-old son Black Axe. These will have settled nearby, after parting from other kinfolk in view of scarce game. One Hodsup brave, not the same family, was already at the post, learning about modern architecture from Jarsken. The brave's name is Watchful Gopher: not a demeaning name, because the Hodsup admire the gopher's alertness.

///// One Snow Drinker, a widely-ranging scout, will be seen. Swooping Raven can boast of having seen a seldom-visited peninsula on the ocean, farther southeast; he wears a vest decorated with colorful shells from there. .
Commerce Mediator Triglon Fedlo from Lower Wenzeppu is a natural to visit the trading post, maybe on board Cloud Wagon

++++++++++++++++++++++

Still in the Ominous Lands, Jaheg-Jorod has had several remote conversations with Frantic Druids on the moon. Main contact, not seen before, is a male named Bexpodo Yellowstem, the father of Star Swallower. Bexpodo took a long time persuading the other Frantics to accept use of technological weapons. Tidumo, the Wellvernian coastal state related to the Loi-Hukshem and Loi-Bavrid, whose shipping Yarbeck Trask attacked, is the desired target, since it is Christian-friendly.

0000000000 \\\\ Jizbrol Tazaff (surname first) from Quelidar, and Kring Dakamish from Jeltua, are the designer and pilot of the dirigible "Queen's Favor," which has been on many adventures. Tazaff is the one who hopes to fly to the moon. He's working on formulating a rope elastic enough to snag the passing moon. Heejee faf-Tujan the marks-girl, daughter of Sazka faf-Boli the lensmaker, is in the expedition. Her Mifdolan bestie, Yadiva Joloris whom she trained in rifle use, is along too.

Rizlaya Tohir, the good sorceress at Prethlonstead in Felruda, may be involved remotely. Since this reality allows GOOD magic to exist, Pastor Silas Larkburg of Saint Kung-Sar Free Church in Tablanor might visit Rizlaya to confer (if he isn't at sea with George Rothermill). Whistler Jerkysalt of Sneeziya in Rufnekkia, as well as Veevalamora Heartlifter, may be involved.

Mellow Druid Froliptar Greenbranch is with them too; I think I'll make him the one who finds an answer...... perhaps after visiting the Elves of Ruffnekkia! Those might have magic rappelling ropes for cliff-dropping. In case it becomes relevant: Habohai, the Uzakmid of Shangri-Blah (analogous to a Dalai Lama), is able to communicate psychically with Queen Juliet-Andrea of Austreejuntzland.

General Cornell Brandon's home is in Tasmuthshire. He is unlikely to finish his far-away diplomatic mission before Froliptar visits this nation.

RONALD OF GOLIAD, long sidelined, knows about the realms along the Six Nations River, and so must go there at last!

At the Pril estate in Hukshem, the Nizozuan women Warrodai and Bohili are well along in Smoke Maiden instruction from Razibi Zur, daughter of the Prils and wife to the dream-wizard T'Pinnok Zur.

OKAY, as I return to "present-time" narration, all of the story-facts given here will be assumed.

 

[Copperfox]

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"Guardsmen, make final observations against possible hazards to the lift-off."

"Yes, Your Highness!"

Within sight of Queen Sotavalit's palace in Mifdola stood a freshly constructed airship, a slightly smaller counterpart of Queen's Favor. Named King's Honor in memory of Sotavalit's widely-loved father Feckladast, this lighter-than-air craft embodied every improvement on the original design which could reasonably be devised-- under the guidance of three native-Mifdolan craftsmen who had become Captains of Skilled Labor. (Might name them later.) As with Queen's Favor, a modest-sized coal-burning engine both fed heat into the buoyancy envelope, and turned a driving propeller. Jizbrol Tazaff's innovation of single-use rockets to make hasty course corrections had been retained. And Prince-

Consort Felipe Catalano was not neglecting to cast his good-magic protection-against-evil spell on the airship; this was reinforced by Vicar Tegmorsh son of Tegloth, with his wife Ranwyn Brightpetal, a Mellow Druidess. I remind the readers that Mellow Druids recognize the actual God. The same combined invocation had proven to be a strong survival factor for the older dirigible.

This was occurring just under a tenday before Gahurrite huntsman Roy Crinkly joined up with Victor Shelsidan at Victor's trading post east of Lower Wenzeppu. Roy got along well with Native-American-like Hodsup tribals, many of whom were acquiring knowledge about industrialized societies. The reader should assume that when King's Honor lands near the trading post, it will be chronologically more or less in the middle of Jonawiku's wilderness quest with Odilladet.
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"This clearing, right here, was our campsite when we practiced with non-working models of rattle-guns. Yarbeck Trask was alive then, telling us fragments of the plan. We didn't know much about any place east of Samplibam or west of Udraski."

No breakthrough discoveries were forthcoming that day or the next. But the Towerman ronin was pleased to notice his older companion recovering practical skills, such as ditching a shelter built on a hillside, so people (and dogs) lying inside it wouldn't be harshly awakened by rainwater soaking their bedrolls.

At last, over a breakfast of fish and edible roots, Odilladet suddenly announced: "I believe the ordained time is near for us to begin seeking Azellajo. My premonition is that we will find her one day before the unknown danger draws near to her."

Jonawiku said, "The formula for 'cannonpowder' has been duplicated by now; the Shogun's troops now have it for their rifles. But did you have any part in manufacturing the propellant for Trask's weapons?"

"Not I; but I know there was a storage cache for some of it."

They went in search of the hidden ammo dump. Enough of the nitrocellulose powder was there to have kept a company of riflemen shooting for an hour or longer, assuming enough cartridges to contain it. Fish Hook smelled it out, and helped to uncover the casks. They transferred the supply to another spot, which the ronin would be able to find later.

This was enough to fill most of the interval before Jonawiku son of Mofiruzo was supposed to search for the kinswoman of his departed Shufiro.
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"Sub-Chief Balzik, please have a look at the new horseshoe forge," said Listens-From-Weeds. "Most of all, say if it will pass enough air through."

At the time when a good-guy force humbled their oligarchy, Count Omar MacFrancis and his wife Countess Cleopatra had fled northward with family, retainers including Balzik, gold-- and a working rattle-gun with ammunition. During the time since they last were onstage, the MacFrancises had found safe harbor with another sort-of-like-Native-Americans community. The Fish Masters, as they called themselves, had profited in the form of technology from their association with Silnarp, and some had served the oligarchy as mercenary light infantry.

After the farrier's forge passed inspection, the mother of Listens-From-Weeds joined the two men. Piercing Eye was a divining woman, similar to the Trail-Chooser in Upper Wenzeppu who had been helpful to the Towermen. She now had something to tell Balzik, for the ears of the Count and Countess.

"Sub-Chief, your master and mistress need to know something. You may remember how a sky-boat of your nation once visited Samplibam, and some of the sky-travelers murdered the wife of a mighty warrior called Jonawiku. This man will soon come to Fish Master territory. He is not now seeking blood. He knows that your master's clan had no part in his wife's death. If his errand is not hindered, he is not likely to harm anyone. But this much is all I know."

Balzik frowned. "Can you say if Jonawiku's errand concerns the guns of my clan?"

"This I know not. I can only say that, at this time, he has no intent of starting any conflict."

 

[Copperfox]

When there were any settlements to be seen, Dijimoyat the Tengu had been keeping watch over his ronin friend from a very long distance. He reckoned that actually accompanying Jonawiku would attract unwelcome curiosity from strangers.

All Tengu, from childhood, learned how to respond to the heavy winds which accompanied each overflight of Punksteema's abnormal moon. We now see Dijimoyat facing a predawn overflight. He could have landed, which he did more than half the time when a moon-pass found him aloft. This time, however, intuition told him that something unusual was coming. All Tengu knew by now that the evil Frantic Druids had found the moon inhabitable, and had at least once launched a magical attack against good-aligned people on the planetary surface. Jonawiku's hawk- headed friend sensed now that something was up. He descended toward where Jonawiku, Odilladet and Fish Hook were encamped.

The border-collie-like dog knew by now to regard Tengu as friendlies. When she approached him, Dijimoyat mustered his talking-with-animals ability. Pointing toward the south-- which meant pointing toward the distant Equatorial Ocean-- he told her, in essence: At this time, there are no good humans anywhere close to us in that direction. I will be sniffing in case any good humans appear on that side later, but for now, I expect BAD humans to approach us at some time, especially if we stay here. (Part of a Tengu's animal-outreach talent included helping the animal to understand concepts like the passage of time.) While things are this way, if you smell or hear humans coming from the direction I showed you, do not bark. Warn us quietly, by quiet growls and pointing posture.

With long-term instructions absorbed, Fish Hook trotted a circling patrol of the vicinity. Dijimoyat, meanwhile, ate a hunk of bread. Jonawiku and Odilladet were sleeping on opposite sides of the campfire. Soon after completing her tour, Fish Hook lay down to sleep a while beside her master. Sensing her presence, the Towerman archer hugged his pet close to him; glanced to see that Odilladet was all right and the Tengu was remaining on guard, then went back to sleep.

No emergencies emerged that night, but Dijimoyat would make sure, before HE slept, that his human friends knew about his foreboding.
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LONG-DISTANCE CHANGE OF SCENE: SOUTH CONTINENT, IN AN EARLIER TIME ZONE FROM JONAWIKU'S CAMP.
NOT THAT PEOPLE ON PUNKSTEEMA HAVE EVER AGREED ON DEFINING TIME ZONES.

Many days' march west of the sort-of-Asian-ish realm of Datsunsel, General Cornell Brendan sat at a council fire with veteran braves of half a dozen tribes, none of whom had waged war against Austreejuntzland in living memory. Some, however, HAD waged war against each other at times; and the very presence this evening of an impartial white chief was facilitating peaceful interaction among the diverse plainsmen. The tribe on whose range-land the meeting was located was called the Fazufor (accent on second syllable). Eeyabibit, a wise woman of the Fazufor, held a sort of chairperson's baton, coordinating men's turns to speak.

Gathered behind the General were the ten Jardekka warriors who had accompanied him on this diplomatic mission. Rutger Sharpe, Corporal of the Queen's Dragoons (who looked remarkably like the Earthly actor Sean Bean in his thirties), remained among these, having been inducted as a member of the Jardekka tribe. Rutger had no wife, and at present no dependents for whom he needed to hasten home. While not finalized, it was looking as if he would be given leave to remain among the Jardekka, as a pledge of inter-ethnic friendship. Having shot arrows in sport back home, Rutger seemed likely to attain proficiency in all the martial skills of his adoptive tribe.

More than one maiden from the western tribes meeting here had glanced at the manly corporal with interest since he came. No one made any such overtures to the General, since he was known to be engaged to Daisy Anne Marshwood, who awaited him back at Hardbiscuit Cottage.

There was one tribe represented here whose men grew beards, called the Washadoli. (First syllable is not like the English word "wash," but rhymes with "splash.") The ranking man among the Washadoli at this powwow, a broad-shouldered pillar of muscle, rose to make his contribution, relying on sign language which Eeyabibit understood well. Knowing the Jardekka spoken language, the moderator spoke to Rutger, supplementing this with hand-signs of her own.

"The warrior Best Rope Maker wishes you to know something about his people. They travel in great wagons drawn by the yellow bison of their land. Each wagon is made strong, so it can stop arrows and throwing-axes if horse riders attack. The Washadoli have double-curved compound bows which can shoot farther than the bows of any other tribe on the plains; also foot-pulled bows, which cannot be aimed narrowly, but which can threaten an enemy force even farther off than our compound bows. Because of this, Washadoli do not need to seek battle, nor flee in fear, for they can repel any attacker." This much being conveyed, Eeyabibit waited for the corporal to interpret it for Cornell Brendan. Then Best Rope Maker continued his sign-language speech.

To sum up what the hands of the wagoneer-brave said next: the Washadoli were not always able to shield their draft bison adequately when assailed by horsemen. (He glowered at some of the other assembled braves.) It was the one weakness of their wagon-fort strategy. Could the white men offer anything in barter which would protect the yellow bison more completely?

General Brendan was well versed in history from Punksteema's equivalent of Earth's medieval era (in which Edgar Pallendin, the first Towerman, had lived). The General considered the barding armor once provided to old-time war horses. It should be possible to reproduce this protective gear for the wagon-drawing bison of the Washadoli.

By the time the council adjourned, General Brendan and Corporal Sharpe were fairly sure that they had gained a friend in Best Rope Maker, without alienating any of the other prairie nations in attendance.
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HAVING FURNISHED A REMINDER OF WELLVERNIAN PLOT ARCS, I'LL SOON REJOIN JONAWIKU'S PARTY ON THE ARCONDOYLAN CONTINENT.

 

[Copperfox]

The MacFrancises of Silnarp received an unexpected visit from Jaheg-Jorod, who materialized alongside a deeply-tanned man whose garb suggested a Frantic Druid. "Mizlaposh Farby here is not a Druid," the necromancer explained. "He is from the distant land of Brishlo, but the Frantic Druids recruited him from there, because he has worked with explosives." A glance invited the demolition specialist to speak for himself; Mizlaposh took the cue, speaking in a commerce language.

"My lord and lady, simple packets of boom-dust can be thrown at a target by siege engines." (Note: In older True Earth English, before steam engines, the word "engine" was used to mean what we would now call a catapult. This motor-less device would fling rocks or bundles of burning substances at an enemy.) "So you would have the benefits of artillery, despite your lack of modern iron forges to make proper cannon."

The MacFrancises could speak adequately in the trade language. Countess Cleopatra asked, "But whom would we shoot AT?"

"The same people who ruined things for you."

Jaheg-Jorod stepped in to make it more obvious for the demoted aristocrats. "You will shoot at those who meddled in the established order of both Silnarp and Udraski: the Samplibami, with their hangers-on in Tagdoss and Flodmarth. With Skillmaster Farby concocting fresh cannonpowder, and strong workmen to construct siege engines, the Frantic Druids and I can conceal your eastward movement. A swift bombardment on the two interposed city-states will draw the Shogun's army out to aid their friends. Then the Frantics and I can slip inside Samplibam, rally the Burakaruts to join us, kill that infuriating Mistress Mukuma, drive away the meddlesome Tengu, and place a new Shogun on Wajitujit's throne. In the broad picture, we DON'T want the One Whom I fear to enlist more new Towermen and Smoke Maidens. With Samplibam occupied by strong-minded people, the force of superiority will spread ever farther across Punksteema."

Count Omar caught the sorcerer's enthusiasm. "We have learned that other worlds exist. If you, invincible Jaheg, with the nature-masters, achieve dominion over all of Punksteema, might it be possible to voyage to those other worlds, and conquer them?"

"I will not lie to you, friend," answered the death-manipulator; "I do not know if that is feasible. But we shall keep it in mind."
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Many tendays' march east of Samplibam, Towerman Roy Crinkly was deepening his friendship with the plains-dwelling Hodsup tribals who frequented Victor Shelsidan's trading post. As we open the scene, Veskamet Jolut and his airship Cloud Wagon are elsewhere, seeking investors for the stringing of telegraph lines to reach farther communities in the east-by-southeast. I will mention the tribe called Snow Drinkers, and here comes my excuse for giving them a translated name instead of being phonetic as with the Hodsup. I decree that the spoken language of the Snow Drinkers includes clicks and snorts which would be awkward to try to write. Individuals of this tribe will be identified by the meaning of their names.

Mounted on the Punksteeman counterpart of a zebra, Widebranch Tree rode through Hodsup land in the direction of the trading post. His people having no quarrel with the Hodsup, he was allowed safe conduct. In turn, he freely explained his purpose to them. Clean Jar, an unattached Hodsup woman who knew and liked Widebranch Tree, elected to ride her horse beside his zebra. Besides liking the Snow Drinker, she intended to be a witness on her tribe's behalf when the messenger spoke with Victor. When they saw other Hodsup in the countryside, Widebranch took care to tell them to be on the lookout for danger, and they should make sure the work-master Jarsken Bowdrie also heard about it.

Three days later, Widebranch asked the rifleman and the merchant: "Have you seen any sign of the savage tunnel-people since the time they called up the accursed Rogbal in the southwest?"

"Only that some of them later attacked the Samplibami people," replied Victor.

Clean Jar glanced expectantly at Widebranch Tree; she had already been shown what he now brought forth to show the white men. It was a piece of antelope hide, on which the Snow Drinker had used charcoal to draw the outline of a footprint.

"Are the feet of tunnel-people of a size like this?"

Roy answered him: "Yes, their feet are like that."

"Then it was those people who climbed up out of the ground in my tribe's hunting land. I do not know of any humans being attacked, but the tunnel-people must be up to something."
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[Copperfox]

Lord Toshiram Yagahodo, friend to Towermen, had collected two rattle-guns from Silnarp. He hung on to one of these, and entrusted the other to a male Tengu named Obuzuni. This one carried the weapon to the region shared by the city-states Tagdoss and Flodmarth, and sketchily explained its operation to important men of the twin cities.

Meanwhile, the Tengu matriarch Zutazor led several others in a circling sweep, extending south well beyond where Jonawiku was encamped. This was well after the recent moon-pass. Within a day and a half, they swooped in to meet with Dijimoyat, Odilladet, Fish Hook and the Towerman-archer.

"What news, Lady Zutazor?" Jonawiku asked.

"Our news is that no Frantic Druids have descended from their moon-fortress to any place near here. I believe you have other business now."

Accordingly, Jonawiku son of Mofiruzo let go of the evil nature-mages in his mind. It was getting near the time when Azellajo, younger cousin of the late Shufiro, was predicted to face peril.
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The small settlement which had been mentioned to Jonawiku was called Elbow Ridge. Three men, unrelated by blood, who had once been comrades in the Udraskian thug-army, and who considered themselves most fortunate to have mustered out before good-guy forces descended on Udraski. I remind the readers that this punitive expedition had included the proficient fighters Donnie Tonka and Ysidro Lopez.

The Udraski escapees, named Sidlum, Charsek and Pladamosh, having less blood on their hands than most, had been able to relocate without complications. Having enough coin to purchase non-perishable provisions, a draft mule, tools and seed, they had occupied unused land, built cabins, and made a go of their little colony. As it became possible, some relatives of theirs who were free to move joined them. On a north-south axis, Elbow Ridge was even with the north end of Samplibam. Azellajo's immediate family, themselves native to the Firahoba Shogunate, had exited Samplibam at the north end, seeking what might be quieter surroundings. Pladamosh and his war-brethren had welcomed them as fresh blood (in a benign sense) for the settlement.

The three founders already had wives; but one Lorko, a younger brother of Pladamosh, was single, and quickly conceived a desire for Azellajo. No one, including Lorko, had exerted any pressure on the maiden. But after her parents died (not by violence, just sickness), Lorko had grown more persistent in his courtship. Azellajo had a brother, named Igsahon-- who was too young to support himself and her. In a most unfortunate piece of timing, Charsek and Sidlum had recently succeeded in setting up a brewery to make ale. Thus, at the very time when Lorko had started to act agitated, he had the means to become agitated AND UNINHIBITED.

This was the situation which a Tengu, a ronin, a de-zombie-ized woman and a collie were about to encounter.

JUST before the air scout of the mixed quartet came within sight of Elbow Ridge, "it" happened. Minimum explanation, because child-friendly community. I will say that the worst didn't happen, but the worst NOT happening came at a cost. In the absence of the settlement's co-founders, Lorko attempted to treat Azellajo disrespectfully. Igsahon tried to defend his sister, only to be clubbed on the head and in the face. The target of the attempted naughtiness was in such a panic that her brain didn't register her brother's injury. She simply ran, like a horse panicked by a fire. Lorko paid even less heed to the dazed boy's faint groans; but he took notice of the rifled musket resting in a wall rack.

Two minutes later, the following events occurred in swift succession. The airborne Dijimoyat caught sight of Azellajo, and began descending; she caught sight of him, and skidded to a halt; Lorko overtook his quarry, then spotted the Tengu; Dijimoyat swerved, in case the crazy-seeming young man might shoot; Lorko did shoot, but failed even to think of tracking his target; Dijimoyat zoomed in and stunned Lorko with a backhand strike, deliberately not drawing blood with his clawed prehensile talon..... and finally, the good-aligned avian goblin faced the trembling maiden.

"Are you hurt, wingless female?"

"I, I-- my brother!!!!!"

Dijimoyat lifted her by the armpits, and flew by low hops (now having trees to consider) until he sighted the modest cluster of cabins and sheds. Plabadosh, brother but not accomplice to the offender, was examining the stunned Igsahon, who had lost five teeth. Recognizing Dijimoyat as a Tengu, Plabadosh blurted, "Can you help him?"

Dijimoyat gave a sharp-beaked nod. "I can stop his bleeding, and given time, I can create new teeth to replace those teeth on the floor."

Once assured that her brother was not permanently injured, Azellajo took a few steps in the direction of where Lorko had been knocked out. By now, Lorko had regained his consciousness but not his conscience. Reloading his musket and moving obliquely for a better line of sight, he took aim.....

But his intent was thwarted when an arrow penetrated his right shoulder. The musket shot hit nothing, while the would-be murderer toppled to his left. Being a super-archer, Jonawiku had purposely directed HIS shot so that it neither killed Lorko by piercing his throat, nor killed him by severing his brachial artery. The Towerman-ronin then dragged the despicable ruffian by the ankle, kicking him harshly in the ribs when he tried to struggle, finally dropping him close to Plabadosh. Odilladet and Fish Hook were bringing up the rear; the relatively-elderly woman soon realized that Azellajo was present, and sprinted toward her.

Thus it came to pass that Jonawiku son of Mofiruzo had indeed saved his late wife's young relative; but he felt no need to boast of it.

 

[Copperfox]

Lady Zutozar came and found Jonawiku's party; Dijimoyat related the recent events to her, then introduced her to Azellajo. The Tengu matriarch recommended that they scout southward, bringing Azellajo along, for any signs that Frantic Druids had shown up since the region had been judged clean. The headmen of Elbow Ridge gave Odilladet a flintlock pistol with ten loads, and furnished a horse which could bring the speedily- recovering Igsahon along too.

Then Zutozar flew toward the region farther north, where the divining-woman Piercing Eye of the Fish Masters' community dwelt alongside the MacFrancises. She was joined enroute by another Tengu female: Ritsuhai, who had lately been assisting Lord Toshiro. Piercing Eye foresaw the bird-beings' peaceful visit, and advised Count Omar and Countess Cleopatra to welcome the Tengu and behave themselves. The Silnarpian retainer Balzik, and Piercing Eye's daughter Listens-From-Weeds, waited alongside their elders. All of them bowed to the hawk-headed visitors.

Zutozar spoke first.

"We are aware that you are not committing any new misdeeds. You have a right to possess the means of self-defense; and we also perceive something you do not guess. Although the foul necromancer urged you to commit aggression against neighboring peoples, he does not care whether you actually do that. He has dismissed you from his plans, while feeling no need to eliminate you. It would amuse him if you slew others, OR if they slew you, but he has other eggs to break. If you commit no fresh offenses, we will allow you to strengthen your modest new domain. Soothsaying woman, you know that I speak truth about the monster shaped like a man. Be advised that our people will visit here at intervals without advance notice, to make sure that you are behaving yourselves."

Balzik spontaneously expressed his patrons' thoughts: "If you are so benign in your intentions, do you offer guidance for our future?"

Ritsuhai answered, "Live as if you never were self-absorbed members of a privileged class. The more enlightened your future conduct is, the more often we Tengu shall visit you. This in turn will bring you a new sort of prestige in the region-- AND make someone like Jaheg-Jorod think twice about bothering you."

It was known to the Tengu that Jaheg-Jorod's late henchman Yarbeck Trask had test-fired the "float harpoon" into the chief seaport of Tidumo. a nation whose people were close racially to the north-continent people of Hukshem, Kikoro, Bavrid and Jeltua. Given the fact that the necromancer was keeping multiple strategies in play, and knowing that Jonawiku still had his own Tengu companion to lend a helping talon, Zutozar and Ritsuhai-- after eating and sleeping-- flew across the Equatorial Ocean to Tidumo's waterfront. A handy small island enabled an overnight rest before continuing, and shelter against the latest moon-passage.
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Knowing it was wise to stay on the good side of Tengu, Harbormaster Fidzab Kulut and other important citizens of the southern port welcomed the new visitors cordially.

"We came to bear news from farther inland," Ritsuhai told the Loi-Tidumo officials. "Persons connected with the dastardly explosive attack on your shipping are still active in Arcondoyla. Some have renounced evil, but their mastermind is forming ties with Frantic Druids. We cannot say whether they contemplate new crimes against you down here....."

Zutozar added information about the Silnarpians. Then she saw a dark-skinned woman whom she recognized. It was Jutmeddu Bishtal, businesswoman from the Arcondoylan state of N'Dazpor. "How fare the N'Dazporhai, good lady?"

Touching foreheads in greeting, Jutmeddu replied, "Mostly well; and the people of the Long Quest Church Alliance have achieved worthy deeds farther north. Yet we know that evil doesn't easily submit to correction."

"This being so, Ritsuhai has volunteered to remain in Tidumo, as a resource for your safety."

Fidzab, having followed all the conversation, said, "Since telegraph lines on our continent are far less well-extended, perhaps the noble Ritsuhai would be willing to fly to Ruffnekkia and report matters to the fellowship of Whistlers."

Copperfox reminds the readers that the "Whistlers" are my version of the Witchers, as in the Henry Cavill series.

The nations along that rivercourse, from the south, are the frigid Ruffnekkia (of which Sneeziya is part), mountainous Shangri-Blah (which contains a valley through which the shallow river passes), Datsunsel (home of kung-fu fighters), Gloomenghast Land (based on Mervyn Peake's pessimistic novel "Titus Groan"), Austreejuntzland (sort of like Jane Austen's Regency England), and Tohaz (maritime nation which I invented long before the others). Next west from Tohaz, with an overlap alongside Austreejuntzland, is the country of Hultisnar. One of its nobles, Count Peltovrik of Welskark, is courting Queen Juliet-Andrea, who is the only child of King Spencer the Fourth.

 

[Copperfox]

Jonawiku, Dijimoyat, Fish Hook, Odilladet, Azellajo and Igsahon will be okay for the time being.
We now revisit the characters we left in the Six Nations River area, reversing time for a few days.
To help myself AND the readers, I may once again KEEP some or all of the statements given here as drafting.
Yes, you are getting an inside look at the fiction-writing process, when there are numerous characters.
Real life is never only about four or five people, so neither is my storytelling.
\ \ \ \ \ \ \ \ \ \ \ \ \ \ \ \ \ \ \ \

DRAFTING. All right, there's the Datsunsha fighter Gwazpor son of Gwaztu from the Distant Waterfall kung-fu school. Darden Quicktrout. My version of "Steerpike" in Mervyn Peake's fiction, fled from Gloomenghast Castle after murdering Gimshelter the royal chef and trying to frame the steward Rawhide, then became friendly with cynical John Weatherby who lusts for Daisy Marshwood. Elsa and little Marjorie are the other daughters of widow Lavinia Fiddleton Marshwood. Relatives Sean and Harriet Fiddleton live in Beldamore Shire; Cornell Brendan's estate is in Tasmuth Shire, next west.

Elsa's intended, a recently-ordained parson, has the first name Heathwell. I seem not to have given him a LAST name; so I'll call him Fairwind.

Habohai, the Uzakmid of Shangri-Blah (analogous to a Dalai Lama), psychically monitors their progress.

Brewster of Goliad is accompanied by Christian cleric Elijah Parsifal.

Remick Whitegrove is the schoolmaster of Gloomenghast. His daughter Jerusha is being sincerely courted by Typhus Gloom, son of King Sickulsell and Queen Zatruga. Frootsalda is Typhus' elder sister.

Sir Tandauzer is the one true knight in Gloomenghast. I need to check if I said he was going to visit Austreejuntzland.

* * Looking back, Otto Kergoff, the first Towerman to die onstage in my saga, came from a small south-continent nation called Pathamel. When he died heroically at Oxhide Spring, his departing spirit passed his talent in the martial art "Song-Fist" to Diego, Talusek, D'Kovo and Ilya. Frethric and Lagmarosk, later taken as students by Wyatt Hickok, were introduced in Tohaz to the "claw sword."

We resume action in Tohaz.

"Constable Hilprish, is your son well now?"

"Thank you, Master Fortescue, yes, Doctor Sunliff did very well by us. You'll be happy to know that Mistress Linzuf's ship made it home safely. She'll doubtless have much to tell about the sponge-harvesting enterprise on Jagged Fence Reef."

Rojimoy Fortescue, treasurer to Juliet-Andrea the First, was partly descended from the merchant class in Ruffnekkia; thus, he had some knowledge about the Whistlers and the Antarctic Elves. In his bureaucratic capacity, he had come to Tohaz with a token escort, along one of the safest highways on the planet, for a scheduled, amicable business conference with heads of Tohazzite mercantile houses. It was already public knowledge in Tohaz that some people in Austreejuntzland had spoken with some of the people from farther south who were visiting in Gloomenghast.
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Sabella Linzuf did indeed speak to the gathering about sponge production, which was a genuine concern for peacetime commodities. During this, one man remained completely silent and watchful: Prefect Bartok Yoder, the boss of Constable Hilprish. He was the only person in the wide room who bore a weapon: a claw-sword, shorter than the average length for this weapon design. It was absurdly unlikely for violence to erupt at so polite a conference among business figures who all knew each other; but in a world where dark magic was real, it was always possible that one participant's mind had been tampered with. Labor-force reports, taxes, tolls, loans, contracts, warehouse repairs: all were meaningful subjects. Bartok, however, was reading as much as listening: reading the numerous men and several women in the room.

All participants were clean. But Sabella, more than an hour after concluding her account of sponge production, brought up the day's most ominous business, which had arisen DURING the sponge-enterprise inspection.

"Each of you remembers the troublemaking Frantic Druid named Star Swallower. Since hired ruffians broke him out of prison, he had not been seen. But two of the sponge divers I met confided to me, separately, that THEY SAW the evil druid UNDERWATER."

Bartok stiffened quietly, then remarked, "It is not unheard of that Druids both good and bad have spells to let them breathe water."

The man who owned the building asked, "Might Star Swallower have been looking to employ sea monsters against civilization, since the ghouls never availed him and his fellows much?"

Sabella Linzuf told him, "It's very possible. Our continent is far behind Arcondoyla in rail travel or airship travel, so crippling our water transportation is the natural thing for highly-placed evildoers."

Neither prefect nor merchants would find satisfactory answers this day, but uncertainty would keep them alert for any answers which major heroes in the story might eventually provide. .

 

[Copperfox]

Changing scene, we find Ronald of Goliad, with his shape-changing brother-in-law Billyboy Jeralo, travelling west on a steamship out of Reslagor. You can feel sure that events NOT featuring these two men have taken up enough time so that the ship now carrying them has had enough time to traverse most of the distance they needed to cover. Their wives Judy and Zoralee, with children, were back in Hukshem, with more than enough protectors available in case of emergencies. Among these protectors on standby were D'Kovo Pril the Towerman archer, and Jillian Shard the Smoke Maiden (wife of Howard Shard, founder of the Captains of Skilled Labor).

Furthermore, there had been plenty of time for Mellow Druids, friends to Zoralee as well as to Towermen and Smoke Maidens, to resolve a probably- forgotten loose end: Polarboy, the cold-weather-suited saddle-buck whom Ronald had ridden on some long journeys. Saddle-bucks don't flourish in hot climates; therefore, the Towerman had done something-or-other to ensure Polarboy's well-being when Ronald was in someplace unsuitably warm. But before the two adventurers had boarded a world-circling steamer, the Mellow Druids had placed a spell on the saddle-buck, so he could endure hot weather as easily as cold. Thus, adding Stonyhoof the mule, Sir Ronald could have two familiar steeds with him when traveling on land, so neither one would be overworked.

According to plan, whichever beast was not being ridden at a given time on the trail, would be loaded with a SMALL amount of the little expedition's gear and provisions, thereby still enjoying respite from a big load. Ronald, having greater long-term endurance than ninety-six percent of all humans on Punksteema, would always carry a large part of the supplies on his own back when he wasn't riding-- and he went on foot for most of each land-traveling day. This was how they had begun on their first leg of travel, when they had made for the Reslagorian coast, and it would resume after they disembarked from the steamship at its westernmost port of call.

Billyboy would never need to ride on any beast, although Stonyhoof and Polarboy knew he was a friend who would not harm them. In his
doomrat shape, he could keep pace with Ronald all day; and his clothes would magically reappear on his body whenever he turned human again.
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In an autonomous Arcondoylan coastal city-state, to which I'll give a name later if necessary, an innkeeper who could speak several commerce languages passed a rumor to the two both-human-at-present travelers.

"If you gentlemen are acquainted with the diverse peoples of Ruffnekkia in the far south, you may be aware that the Gnomes of that land rarely visit other inhabited lands, apart from neighboring Shangri-Blah where they are sometimes hired for construction work. Lately, however, merchants who pass through here say that the Gnomes have become interested in advanced non-magical technology."

"Technology for what?" asked Billyboy. "For more efficient mining?"

"For moving freight. One way or another, accounts of steam locomotives riding on tracks have come to their attention. Top-ranking headmen among the Gnomes reckon that, if they can LAY TRACKS like the ones used for trains in countries like Tablanor, they could build railways even before they can buy or build locomotives. Making wagons of correct wheel-spacing for the rails, they could have draft animals pull the wagons along the tracks."

Ronald patted the hilt of his rapier. "Even if they couldn't build proper trains, the gentler path provided by rails would at least reduce fatigue for the oxen or horses doing the work. And if they make a go of it, people up in Tohaz and Austreejuntzland might be persuaded to invest in building locomotives. Create something like the Compass Railway network centered in Tablanor."

Billyboy, who had absorbed some of his detective sister's intuition for people's motivations, put in: "But the more that those relatively-advanced countries take interest in improved land travel, the more they'll draw the attention of chaotic-evil scoundrels."

My not immediately naming the place doesn't mean I can't name an individual citizen. Accordingly, a local family steps into story-existence.

The middle-class family approached Billyboy, oblivious to his werebeast specialty. They asked him whether the famous gunslinger-knight might be willing to take on a new apprentice. Nineteen-year-old Hostiguth Yorof (first name rhymes with "youth"), middle one of seven children in a household, already had gainful employment as a leatherworker: not shoes, but nearly everything else, even tents of beast-hide. To hear his parents, half the people in the city and its attached rural territory possessed high-quality leathern objects made by Hostiguth.

"Sir Towerman, I'm not trained for war; but I'm both dexterous and hardy. I can run faster than anyone else around my age here, except a few city guardsmen and hunters. I can walk without pausing for ten kabsab--" {a locally-used time-unit, each one equal to 42 minutes} "--while carrying sixty pounds on my back. And I follow instructions faithfully."

By a vote of two to zero, Ronald and Billyboy decided to take Hostiguth Yorof on as an apprentice. The young man would prove to have as good a work ethic as his parents insisted he had. This included his learning some of the tasks of the sailors. Yes, he was a keeper. But only when they disembarked in Tohaz would Ronald quietly disclose to Hostiguth Yorof that Billyboy was a werebeast.

 

[Copperfox]

"I am here to inspect your progress in waterproofing the new storage cell."

"You'll have no cause for complaint, Master of Obscure Knowledge," replied Peplijad. "It won't be any surprise to you that we're working WITH each rock layer, making it easy for ground water to travel down and BYPASS the storage space."

Uzakmid Habohai, the spiritual headman of Shangri-Blah, was meeting the Gnome at the base of his country's mountains, close to the Six Nations River in its lowland course, rather than on a peak. He had levitated himself down.

For all of the centuries since Punksteema had been created by Aslan (created in mid-movie, so to speak), the Shangri monks had been just like the Mellow Druids in practicing a system which had a superficial resemblance to pantheism, but which really stayed aware of the True Creator Who was MORE THAN the universe. Each Uzakmid in his turn had overseen preparation of storage caves to hold records of the Shangri order, and for most of that time Gnomes had been the excavators.

While touring the working area with Peplijad, Habohai abruptly stiffened, his eyes closing for a long moment. Then he looked at three subordinate Gnomes who had been standing by in case of new instructions. "Thank you, gentlemen, please go see to the new pack-ponies. Your headman will rejoin you shortly."

Peplijad frowned in puzzlement. "What are you thinking, Preceptor of Abstractions?"

"The Ultimate Mind has told me something, but its short-term fulfillment is for you to accomplish. You must proceed today and tomorrow as you would have done anyway. Then, without my directing you, select a spot which YOU believe would be the best starting point for the NEXT future archive. After you do this, He will provide you with a sign, which you will reveal to me, and to your most reliable fellow Gnomes. The sign will point us toward something-- I know not what, but something which will aid in achieving a great victory against evil."
..... ..... ..... ..... ..... ..... .....

That night, shortly after Queen Juliet-Andrea the First lay down to sleep in Pitcherton Palace, a voice spoke inside her head. She was not alarmed; she knew it to be Uzakmid Habohai, who used his mind-speaking power at intervals to keep her apprised of important events occurring south of her kingdom. When his report was complete, the Uzakmid used his telepathy to pass the Queen's instructions to General Cornell Brendan in the west.

Corporal Rutger Sharpe was to be promoted immediately to sergeant, and would be placed in command of two squads' worth of soldiers. These would remain where they were, with friendly plains people, until further notice. A trooper of Sharpe's choice would be breveted as a temporary corporal to head the second squad. The General would lead the rest of his command, with any tribals who desired to accompany him, and make overland toward Shangri-Blah. (The mystic was able to assure Juliet-Andrea that none of those natives would act treacherously against General Brendan.)

This action will assist persons on the side of good to combat a very great evil. I must not reveal overmuch at this time. What you do not know, evil mages cannot read from your mind. I do urge that you ask Parson Heathwell Fairwind to organize continual prayer against the present evil; Fairwind possesses great spiritual authority.

When Daisy Anne Marshwood at Hardbiscuit Cottage learned that her husband-to-be was facing still further delays in coming home, she indulged in feeling slighted, and filled the ears of her little sister Marjorie with it.

At a subsequent encounter with the scoundrel John Weatherby, Daisy did not hesitate to complain about Brendan's neglectfulness. Weatherby, of course, was theatrically sympathetic toward the sulking girl. "It isn't much of a surprise, Miss Daisy. A man who has devoted his life to the madness of war is probably incapable of passionate love. If you had married him--" (John deliberately talked as if Daisy breaking up with the General were already an accomplished fact.)

 

[Copperfox]

Sir Tandauzer of Gloomenghast had received King Sickulsell's permission to venture north into Austreejuntzland for a goodwill visit to Pitcherton Palace: this, in part, to gauge Queen Juliet-Andrea's mind on the subject of stringing telegraph lines between the two nations. Two large wagons rumbled behind the noble armsman, partly loaded with many of the superb wood carvings which were the marsh kingdom's most successful export. The aristocracy in this Jane Austen-derived country possessed an abundance of this artwork, but there was no rule against the middle class, even laborers, owning them.

Austreejuntzland being close to crime-free, Tandauzer's entourage had only one other armed man: a retainer named Bartaben, who carried a rifled musket. The drovers conversed casually with locals along the route. Some of these chattered about the Queen being visited by some kind of large bird who had arms in addition to her wings. "That must be a Tengu!" exclaimed Bartaben, who had heard of them. He learned further that Ritsuhai had already been down to Ruffnekkia, where she had met with some of the Elves there. The rearguard soon repeated what he had heard to Tandauzer.

The lady Tengu was alongside a royal secretary named Lothar Dalton who officially welcomed the travelers. "Welcome back, Tandauzer. This is Ritsuhai from distant Samplibam, who has been so kind as to facilitate interaction among people of good will along the Six Nations River."

The ensuing conference with the Queen produced lots of useful fact-sharing. And Juliet-Andrea subsequently had a telepathic discussion with Habohai down in Shangri-Blah. Even if telegrams became commonplace, she would want to retain this backdoor link.

Darden Quicktrout, meanwhile, took care not to be seen by Tandauzer. He and John Weatherby could pass time easily enough in those neighborhoods which catered to persons a lot less morally upright than the cavalier of Gloomenghast.
..... ..... ..... ..... ..... ..... ..... .....

In a world without jet aircraft or bullet trains, people simply DON'T travel nearly halfway around the equator in a few days without magical assistance, especially against the prevailing current. And powers like the angels who teleported Ronald between continents early in our history all had other stuff to look after. Hence, abundant opportunity for the Top Towerman to review his recent years for Hostiguth Yorof.

"There were NO OTHER living Towermen on Punksteema then-- I've explained about Wyatt-- all Smoke Maidens were on the north continent, and the Whistlers were thousands of miles away; so I was the single best huntsman to go after the dire wolves of the Crybabiya grasslands. I had four enchanted crossbow arrows; I called them War, Famine, Plague and Death. Also a lariat, a battleaxe and a poniard. I like to change my weapons fit every two or three years, to keep from being fossilized in habits. When the dire-wolf menace was put down, spirits assigned by God whooshed me north to Arcondoyla. My first mission was to expose and thwart treason in the Malgriff Thanedom of Bamulica. Providence brought me new friends rapidly from there, including a young Loi-Hukshem gentleman called T'Pinnok. He has a passive magic: he foresees important events in dreams.

"At the same time I began choosing apprentices, I also became acquainted with Jillian Shard, a veteran Smoke Maiden. She and her husband-- who was later to become the founder of the Captains of Skilled Labor-- came from Reslagor. Though not evil all through, Reslagor was to be the birthplace of some grossly evil deeds. My next great duty, however, lay far eastward, in Tablanor. Jaheg-Jorod, positively the most wicked and powerful of necromancers, was testing his power there. The Creator enforced some limits on his activity; in particular, his ghouls or liches were NOT ALLOWED to kill children. While combating this evil, I gained allies in addition to apprentices. This included a good witch in Felruda, named Rizlaya Tohir. Also a northland hunter named Burzu Yunsh, who owned a magic spear......."

Billyboy was given a turn at narrating. He spoke of his elder sister's connection with Mellow Druids, her career as a detective, his own love story with Judy Lightheart in Gromstark, Zoralee's detective career, the curse which transformed him into a doomrat (retaining his human mind, but for many tendays being unable to regain human shape), and his profound gratitude for Judy staying true to him, praying for his cure.

Ronald then recounted later adventures, including the Battle of Oxhide Spring where Otto Kergoff died, and the momentous visit to Samplibam where the Colorless Quetzalcoatl restored Wyatt Hickok to active life. Young Mister Yorof was getting a massive condensed education.

 

[Copperfox]

At the Fiddleton estate in the middle of Austreejuntzland, Sir Sean Fiddleton was doing something he didn't have to do. Alongside his chief steward Tom Hillerman, he was raking gravel, uprooting weeds and pruning trees. His wife Dame Sylvestra had gracefully accepted this habit of Sean's before their nuptials, which had done much to make their marriage happy. Right now, she was tossing sticks for the wolfhound Readyrough to fetch. The dog who would have stood an even chance fighting a bear, still was a fun-loving 140-pound puppy when his duties permitted.

At one point, however, the wolfhound halted the game, to stand gazing and sniffing toward the south. Not with worry, though; his tail was wagging still harder. Then, by posture and staring, he told his humans that he wanted them to come along and see something.

They came along, and soon beheld an Elf man, whom Sir Sean had met before: one of the Elves who had ritually conferred onto Roughready the power to damage evil magical beings. As the Elf began petting the happy watchdog, Sylvestra explained to Tom who this was. Meanwhile, Sean opened conversation.

"Lord Kibbratoth, well met! If you are free to relax, please come and take refreshment in my house!"

"Thank you, Sir Sean. I would happily do so, if not that my errand requires me to be, if not altogether hidden, yet not conspicuous. I can tarry only long enough to convey my request."

"For some helpful toil?" asked Goodman Hillerman.

"In a manner of speaking. My people foresee, albeit not in any detail, that ominous events may be near. But we do not wish to noise our concerns abroad. Instead, we propose to use a means of communication which is no more magical than the proposed new telegraph lines.

"Please do not volunteer to anyone else the fact that I visited you. Starting with tomorrow, let one and a half tendays pass. On the morning AFTER those fifteen days are finished, let Readyrough depart by himself-- with a message packet hung around his neck. In this packet will be information written by you, Sir Sean, or by Lady Sylvestra if you are hindered. The information will be whatever local events in the interval were the most unusual-- or the ABSENCE of any strange events. This news will help us Elves, and very possibly the Whistlers in addition, to plan our own actions, without any evil spies discovering that this communication transpired."
..... ..... ..... ..... ..... ..... ..... .....

Mounted on his trusty Punksteeman zebra, Widebranch Tree of the Snow Drinker tribe (so named because they relied on mountain runoff to provide their water supply) rode westward through Hodsup land, making for Victor Shelsidan's trading post. His people having no quarrel with the Hodsup, he was allowed safe conduct. In turn, he freely explained his purpose to them. Clean Jar, an unattached Hodsup woman who knew and liked Widebranch Tree (A LOT), elected to ride beside him on her own gelding horse.

Each traveler was carrying a piece of evidence. Widebranch's mount being less troubled by the smell of blood, he was bringing the severed head of a Bloody Digger whom Widebranch personally had slain three days ago. Clean Jar bore a trophy less gruesome but more puzzling. Jarsken Bowdrie, one of the most senior Captains of Skilled Labor, would notice and explain the uniqueness of the tools taken from the trespassing goblins.

"Bloody Diggers don't make steel, and the human outlaws who might have supplied these have been dead or in prison for two years or longer. Look at this compact crowbar, a pretty rare implement. Railroad workers would fit the claws around the head of a tie-spike, then strike the other end. Not a very frequent action, since it would only be done if a tie needed to be removed and replaced by another."

Clean Jar asked, "Could the Diggers be building a RAILROAD?"

"Not for actual trains," Jarsken replied, "no space for it, even if smoke weren't an issue. But it matches the tracks used by hand-pushed cars in mine shafts. The Diggers might have used the same approach when they sneaked into Samplibam."

Widebranch Tree cocked his head. "Not much for them to steal in our territory." He gestured at Clean Jar, signifying that he had in mind the Hodsup range as well as that of the Snow Drinkers."

"Their plan might be to block travel in the east for humans. When Veskamet gets back with his airship, we'll discuss asking the Wenzeppuans to get involved out here. Try to get ahead of whatever the goblins are plotting."
..... ..... ..... ..... ..... ..... ..... .....

 

[Copperfox]

The sister kingdoms of Brishlo and Brishdar were located right about 150 degrees of longitude away from the territory where Victor Shelsidan and Jarsken Bowdrie were cultivating commerce. A Brishlon or a Brishdaran, lacking extraordinary means of travel, would be lucky to cover that much east-west distance in the equivalent of five Earth-months.

Mizlaposh Farby, the explosives expert recruited into the service of Jaheg-Jorod, fled from Brishlo when the law got after him for arson. This had occurred well before any of the events I have depicted happening in Gloomenghast. Stelshuff Pindu, also a Brishlon, was on Mizlaposh's trail, because his middle-class family had been devastated financially when Mizlaposh burned their home and business property. Sympathizers of the Pindu family had hired a less-known shaman to divine where Mizlaposh went; he also foretold that Stelshuff would know an ally when he met a warrior whose name signified a large tree. With Stelshuff went his favorite war-badger, a male called Rocksplitter.

Stelshuff was armed with a semi-automatic pistol, copied from the sidearms used by the Malgriff Hussars who had once visited Brishlo and Brishdar on a mission. He had only two magazines for it, but carried enough extra bullets to reload each magazine twice. One of the two already-inserted magazines contained nine silver bullets. Weapon-resistant monsters were a microscopic percentage of Punksteema's global population, but you never knew.

Present time in our story finds the despicable Mister Farby still many days' travel west of the Shelsidan trading post. You may assume, however, that Stelshuff and Rocksplitter will get to meet Widebranch Tree, Clean Jar, and all of that lot, and that events in this vicinity will give the small-A avenger and his faithful badger plenty of good-guy stuff to do.
..... ..... ..... ..... ..... .....

The reduced regiment of Queen Juliet-Andrea's Dragoons was three days' march from Datsunsel. A plainsman brave named Climbs To Moon (thus named because of a childhood rock-climbing incident, in which he had saved the life of a playmate who was nearly flung to his death by the winds of a moon-pass) was serving as a volunteer forward scout. Best Rope Maker, most senior of the tribals accompanying General Brendan, had usually ridden half a rifle shot ahead of the white soldiers: riding on a yellow buffalo.

At the point in time where we rejoin these characters, Climbs To Moon wheeled his horse to face back toward Best Rope Maker. Exaggerating his gestures to be recognizable at a distance, he sign-spoke, his meaning as follows: Three white men on horses approaching. None have weapons in hand. One looks like an Elf of the cold lands.

Once this was made known to the General, he rode forth with Best Rope Maker, to join Climbs To Moon in meeting the approaching trio. Two of these were Brewster of Goliad and Elijah Parsifal, who had turned back south because Elijah had received a divine prompting to meet a northward-riding Elf (no direct connection with Veevalamora Heartlifter) named Finvoldin True-Thrust. When Punksteema next gets our attention, we will discover what news Brewster, Elijah and Finvoldin brought to the General. It will have a connection with the quest for a way that non-villains can finally counterattack the moon base of the Frantic Druids.

 

[Copperfox]

Another changeable review, to re-orient readers to the gigantic salad bar of super-ing still in progress on the mineral-rich planet called Redundantworld, where nasty Everperpetualists and "regular" super-villains disregard the rights of natives. The Ever's are the ones who invited the Living Appeals Court. The bird-headed Fataldeathalyzers invited Doctor Handmitten, but DIDN'T wait for him to show up. Note that, in case I didn't mention this earlier, Handmitten is the real mind behind the Bazonkers, who ARE the reason why Galaxy Three has FAR FEWER inhabited worlds than the others.

Top-line good guys on that Third Galaxy world include Superdude, Superhottie, Black Admiral, Bakerstray Bill, Thorpe son of Garryowen, Walloper Woman, Princess Grrrryyll, She-Wow, Oliver Hackman, Esteban Mazarino, and Sha-Na-Na.

WE NEED A ROSTER OF WHAT HEROES WERE LAST SEEN WHERE. SOME ARE DEPLOYED ON THE PLANET'S EQUATOR!
////////
Something which will happen is that the Janitors of the Universe on Planet Wawa note availability of two extra heroes on Terra: Puma-Claw and Kimchee Man. To enable him to leave the Latin America of his world, they take a sample of soil from Nicaragua, and fuse it into his skull, so he can carry Latin America with him!
\\\\\\\\

In the northern hemisphere:
Pavel "Colosseumus" Razumnik, with wife Woman Torch \\ Plabdof (water-breathing red frog) is with Yepyep "Black Stingray" Mammameeya

At the north pole:
Thorpe, Ballwun, Parbellik Magta with Luvardra the Dahudoran

Along the equator:

Superhottie with Poradsimu;

In the southern hemisphere:
Woman Torch with Colosseumus. \\ Masked Biker, Liquid Snake, Anteater Woman and Cyborg Alsweeta. Adam Wornsock and Green Flashlight Shimtuku saw action against the Everperpetualists, the ones who have called for the Living Appeals Court.

At the south pole:

Bakerstray Bill & Speedy Greyhoundus

: : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : :

The Second (Andromeda) Galaxy has had no direct involvement with Redundantworld in the saga up to now; but the near-human Dahudoran race, to which Heart Sapphire Luvardra belonged, originated in that galaxy, and had been in on the creation of that sisterhood. The Stellar Federation, a little bit like Star Trek's Federation, was one of two nuclei of civilization in that galaxy. The other nucleus, not shown onstage for many chapters, was the world of New Laziness, home to the cowardly King Highfyver. He was the originator of the Anti-Strife Equation, a psionic tool intended to make people bow down to whoever was in the wrong. Part of the mental work of devising "Anti-Strife" had consisted in Highfyver chanting, "It takes two to fight, two to fight, so if one lies down, one lies down, there can be no fight, be no fight!"

This wimpy counterpart of the vicious Twerpseid had conceived the Sapphire Sisterhood as a complementary force for cowardice, appeasement and surrender. No thanks to him, some of the Heart Sapphires had proven to be active champions of goodness, a fine example being Nolarivu Pamizo who now dwelt on Jersey Earth. Also no thanks to Highfyver, Twerpseid had lost his ability to conquer anyone, and had ended up as a monitored guest of New Laziness.

Princess Grrrryll was the only member of that warped family to have joined the side of good. This was why she was now besties with Walloper Woman, and was gladly part of the campaign to liberate Redundantworld. But there's more to say about the Second Galaxy.

The Stellar Federation was less like Star Trek than it was like "Blake's Seven" on British television decades ago. If you've ever seen "Blake's Seven," you know it is precisely the kind of thing which motivated your servant Copperfox to begin writing an antidote to bloated pessimism. Standing in for BBC-TV's tragic Roj Blake was Lodge Flake, once a highway patrol sergeant on the disorderly Planet Madmaksilon. His second cousin Royurbota Quardimo, partly Dahudoran, had loved him all her life, and had helped him in his painful adventures. By the way, Green Flashlight Jamsorvad had been in on that epic as well, as had the good wizards Hector von Bootblack and Mazash. Rather than die in vain as Roj Blake on British TV had died, Lodge Flake had been metamorphosed into Captain Rightawrong, arguably EVEN mightier than Truthside, Black Admiral or Dragon Equivvalentor.

This is up for interpretation, because of Rightawrong's peculiar limitation. He could do almost anything, including cosmic-scale teleportation; but for whatever length of time he spent being invincible, he would eventually have to spend as much time being his old self (in some cases, beaming back to his native Madmaksilon) before taking up his powers again. Regardless of this awkwardness, once Mazash brought him news of Doctor Handmitten threatening a populated world, Lodge Flake knew he had to go there.

Royurbota was tolerating no argument about accompanying her cousin-husband; and Chutnykorn, a cyborg who had shared their struggle against the Scurvylaff regime, invited himself along besides. The Flakes didn't have to worry about their children; highly-civilized warriors of the Ziblamot race would lovingly look after the kids.

The trio jumped first to the First Galaxy, which was far better known to them than the Third. Landing on Hallpasscard where it orbited, not far from the Earth-variant where the Revengists were headquartered, they met with King Garryowen. He presently directed Timekall the All-Seeing to send them along to Jumpstard, where Astrosmeller would brief them.

 

[Copperfox]

At Castle Greyhair on Planet Alwaysurnia, Sorcery Lass was still absorbing universe-juice in her place of power. She had farther to go before she was fully back to her goddess-level might; but she intuitively knew that she ought to round up some reinforcements for the heroes on Redundantworld. Captain Rightawrong couldn't be everywhere at once, and his power level was not needed everyplace. Readily available for gap-filling were the veteran soldier Dolph Bluntgrin, his werebeast wife Subsoila, the former villainess Glad Ruthie, the winged man Flappos, and the swaggering Notsobadd Bunny with his magic switchblade from Forgeworld.

This lawful-good quintet (well, Notsobadd was chaotic good) materialized on the outskirts of a Redundantworld city, northern hemisphere. There to meet them, tipped off by the Janitors of the Universe, was Jamsorvad of the Flashlight Corps. With him were a dozen or more of the tall demi-human Redundantworlders. Four of these natives broke out speaking at once. The baboon-shaped Green Flashlight explained to his new reinforcements: "This is a vast planet; in case you weren't briefed, its density of magma and core is light enough that, although surface area is much larger than the terrestroid norm, its gravity is Earth-like. You can move around normally, but there are vast regions where natives don't even know that they were invaded by four intrusive alien races. Some regions have landline telephones, but none have radio."

Dolph Bluntgrin, the most martial of the newcomers, took a step forward. "Sorcery Lass told us to expect someone here to brief us."

"Nothing complicated. You five are effectively a police force until your mission changes. The natives here are morally no worse than humans-- or than my own species; but they're not better either. Fear of the unknown (none of the residents of this town had seen any obvious aliens until I flew here yesterday) may worsen any bad behaviors they were prone to manifest. Did Sorcery Lass magic you to be able to speak with natives here?"

Subsoila startled herself and the natives by correctly replying in the local tongue: "Yes, well enough to suit plotline convenience."

^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^
Preston Vincent, once a helicopter pilot on Earth-Whichever (the same Earth-variant where Doc Slippage was born), had been a small-g god for years now, officially called King Truthside. Mightier than Superdude, Superhottie, Black Admiral, Thorpe Thundermaster, Bakerstray Bill, or Captain Sha-Na-Na. He ruled Awkwardlisp, a planet which had once been a nightmare, but under his management it had become wholesome.

Able to survey the cosmos at least as widely as Timekall or Astrosmeller could, Preston Truthside understood how many evils existed in the multiverse of the Never-Stopping Story. He also knew what Planet Punksteema was, although it was firmly set apart from other story-worlds. His very knowledge made him chronically uneasy. He knew about the Everperpetualists and other arrogant ancient civilizations. He even knew what Hopecrusher Central was. For many days, his also-superhuman wife Whiskey Dallas Vincent had seen him worrying. Should he pitch in on Redundantworld before new evils invaded it, or should he stay put because still other over-powered fiends might be waiting for him to leave his kingdom less protected? He had not yet heard the good news of Captain Rightawrong coming.

Having their children to think about, Whiskey would not be venturing away in any case. But she realized that Preston had to think "big picture." What would tip the scales for King Truthside was finding out about things called Bazonkers..... and an artifact known as the Hagensaber.

^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^

Let the readers assume here that Willie Ekubo, the Chicago boy on Original Earth, is following this plot arc, and is acquainted with the classic Berserker novels by Fred Saberhagen. Willie even realizes that the Berserker series inspired the old Star Trek episode where a huge cone-shaped thing was blowing up worlds. \\\\ At the same time, back inside the Never-Stopping Story, the good wizard Hector von Bootblack was aware that current story-reality in the Third Galaxy was taking in Fred Saberhagen's concept.

Remembering how Copperfox's takeoff on the Halo game had SIMULATED a long history, without requiring any actually-living fiction-based people to suffer by the imagined savagery of the Preliminaries and the Introductories, Hector was glad that no flesh-and-blood beings had really been made to suffer so much horror for no better purpose than storytelling. The "Bazonkers" had been conjured into existence with memory-storage believing they had wiped out many entire species. But they had no souls, thus eternal condemnation wasn't even an issue for them. Doctor Handmitten, however, had existed long enough, WITH sentience and free will, that he was morally accountable for his deeds. In the impending event-sequence, he WOULD be granted a fair chance to repent and be saved from everlasting punishment.

^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^

In the tangible simulated reality, before any hero-stuff began to be done on Redundantworld, the remorseless formerly-human energy-being Doctor Handmitten, having forsaken humanity and embraced Evil Badness for the sake of feeling superior, had found a decimated force of Bazonkers. These had been defeated by somebody or other on the side of good, but only after having annihilated (in simulated reality) hundreds of sapient races. This explains why Galaxy Three has less total population than my depiction of the Milky Way and Andromeda galaxies. The sort-of-squid-like evil aliens who attempted an "Independence Day" operation many chapters back had previously driven off a Bazonker attack: more than most intended victims had been able to do. A conclusive defeat of the genocide machines had been the work-- oddly enough-- of King Highfyver, BEFORE he turned coward. The junk piles he had left in his wake were too shattered to restore themselves.

Six intelligent races with rudimentary spaceflight capability had remained in that half of Galaxy Three. The King of New Laziness had upgraded their spacegoing ability to lightspeed grade-- then moved their entire planets, one at a time, to orbit compatible stars far from where Bazonkers had ever intruded. As a still-bigger followup, he had moved nine other inhabited worlds all the way to Galaxy TWO for their safety. This, however, had been a tiring chore even for a small-g god. (INSERTING A RETROACTIVE DETAIL)===> Highfyver's world had been called "New Restfulness" before this, but henceforth he dubbed it New Laziness. It was years after this that Highfyver dreamed up the Anti-Strife Equation.

But the opposite number of Twerpseid had taken one other valuable measure before he let himself turn wimpy. He had created a magic weapon similar to the Dark Machete in my Star Wars-related plotline. Called the Hagensaber because one planet Highfyver aided was called Hagen Four, it had a physical blade but was also charged with cosmic energy. It was primarily intended to destroy evil robots. Before beginning semi-retirement, Highfyver had entrusted it to human-like people of the Asgard-based planet Flashgard. He couldn't foresee this world later being destroyed by major evildoers. One survivor from Flashgard was Prince Lowerkey, the good-aligned Loki-variant who found a new home on Hallpasscard as a brother to Thorpe Thundermaster.

Yes, that same Lowerkey was now on Redundantworld.

The missing Hagensaber was forgotten; but yes, I do plan to bring it into the action soon.

^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^
Repairing the long-dead murder machines when he discovered them decades after their defeat by Highfyver, Doctor Handmitten had then instructed them to concentrate on asteroid mining, so they could refine materials to build new robots and ships. He would summon them when he needed their help, or if he decided he should share the fun of thrill-killing millions of innocent beings just because he could.

He was aware that many humans believed "hate" was the essence of all evil. The energy-devil knew better. He didn't even regard humans as VALUABLE ENOUGH that he should bother hating them. His love of himself was enough. He existed exclusively for his own pleasure, and it suited him to be cruel. Even his cosmic arrogance, however, could at least hypothetically imagine that someone somewhere might exist who was powerful enough to FIGHT BACK against him.

Which led to his becoming aware of the existence of The Living Appeals Court. Someone lawful evil to challenge Handmitten's chaotic evil.

 

[Copperfox]

Four days after Jamsorvad had established Dolph Bluntgrin's contingent in the recently-mentioned northern town, the veteran Green Flashlight brought two longer-established human friends there, a married couple. The spouses were associate members of the Justified League on Urth, to which the Tonkrypian cousins also belonged. Martin Alpert, formerly known as Atomic Scalp, had come over to the side of good on the same day as Aluminum Banshee and Stellar Sapphire had done so; those two no-longer-evil women had soon married Gleaming Knight and Tapper Cossack respectively. Sir Jasper had not come to Redundantworld with Vasily Leonidovich Tarasov; SOME heroes had to stay on Urth, and be available to assist Senphatorians and Zazdubs.

Ululani Atuf-Alpert, an experienced astronaut, had accrued most of her spaceflight experience flying the Tachyon Loop circuit which maintained Urth's contact with Zazdub World and Senphatori. But when she came to possess the strength of seven athletic women, she had become that much better suited to share in the adventures of her humanized-monster husband. Their love life had been enhanced by her improvement; their love life had BECOME POSSIBLE after Martin's tendency to spew flame had become far better controlled.

Meanwhile, Kimchee Man and Puma-Claw had been cosmically transferred by the Janitors of the Universe to meet fellow Terran Captain Sha-Na-Na. They already knew each other; Sha-Na-Na told them: "There's a man from a different version of Terra, an officer of public justice there, who's been brought here."

Puma-Claw ventured a guess. "The Janitors told us that this planet has nothing close to a planetary government. Is the other-world attorney here to offer advice on creating community without favoritism?"

The Korean hero frowned into the air. "The world, any world I know about, DOESN'T NEED a monopoly government."

Sha-Na-Na took a placating tone. "None of us is qualified to guide a whole sapient race toward a decision like that. Mister Perry, he's the United States Attorney-General on his Terra-variant, has business he never imagined before."

^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^
The King Kong-sized, three-faced immortal called The Living Appeals Court had been passing his time scolding Redundantworlders about this or that. For example, at several villages with no vehicles beyond a few beast-pulled wagons, he had lectured the natives about implementing complex traffic control. Both of the Odin-variants, the humanoid one and the doglike one, were keeping track of what Appeals Court and Handmitten were up to. In agreement with other leaders of goodness including Dragon Equivvalentor and Sorcery Lass, they were convinced that Doctor Handmitten was immeasurably more evil than the caricature of moral law could ever be, but that Appeals Court could be persuaded to help sane heroes against the energy-demon's cruelty.

The space-time watch-standers Timekall and Astrosmeller notified their respective sovereigns when Sha-Na-Na, Kimchee and Puma met with Mason Perry, whose current on-duty protector was the insectoid Green Flashlight named Shimtuku. Astrosmeller facilitated Martin and Ululani Alpert, a.k.a. Mister and Missus Atomic Scalp, being transported to meet Mason Perry, because Mister Perry was from Urth as they were.

When, the next day, Attorney-General Perry was brought by his mighty protectors to meet the Living Appeals Court, the first thing he said to the psychotic law-definer was: "Your Triple-Faced Honor, I am a prestigious official on my own planet. These are my bailiffs. We respectfully ask to consult with you about an egregious challenge to zoning laws."

The head facing to the giant's left asked, "What is the nature of this violation?"

"It is a case of unauthorized plans to obliterate this world. The culprit is flagrantly disregarding the reduction of property values consequent upon the aforesaid obliteration, and has not submitted any proposal to remediate inconvenience befalling interstellar shipping."

This got the irrational giant's attention.

 

[Copperfox]

Around the same time as Mason Perry was reasoning with the Living Appeals Court, Prince Lowerkey became aware that another native town which had not yet been directly visited by any of the off-world heroes, WAS being visited by fellow natives who were not above robbery. This town had been given solar-powered refrigerators by the departing Omnipotentacons, and the neighbors were starting to breathe rhetoric about "resource equity" and "fair distribution."

Vasily Leonidovich Tarasov and his biologically-enhanced wife Lumina Tarasova (formerly known as Aluminum Banshee) were available to join the Flashgardean- Hallpasscardean prince. After Lowerkey briefed them, Dmitri (a.k.a. Tapper Cossack) remarked, "My family in Russia saw the reality of 'equal distribution,' when the distributing all went one way. But I don't think this obstanovka is quite like Stalinism. The refrigerators weren't invented or built by the recipients, any more than by the ones now pressuring them."

Lumina picked up the thread of her husband's thought. "If we give these natives a literal song and dance, we can prevent any violent clash, WHILE calling for a win-win solution. Doc Slippage has the technical skills to duplicate these refrigerators; probably some other people too. We need only prevent any impulsive altercation, while expediting a bit of wholesome equity."

Happily, no one at the location of interest had yet come to blows. With no brawl in progress, it was easy for Lumina to start singing; for Dmitri to start dancing; for the Redundantworlders to join the dance-- and for Lowerkey to teleport in search of Kirk Slippage. Doc Slippage and his colleague Jiang Fung-Yao were both swamped with patients at their field hospital; but some of the Brazilian personnel on site were available, and had both skill and materials to fabricate parts for counterparts of the disputed refrigerators. Lowerkey hastened to transport personnel and hardware to the rural community. As icing on the peacemaking cake, Lumina used her sonic blasts to dig multiple pits which the locals could turn into cellars. With the solar panels for heat-exchangers remaining above ground, the actual refrigerators could be situated underground, thus partly insulated against loss of cooling.

The work of the multi-planetary mission wasn't all combative.

^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^
Elsewhere, some of the robotic Bazonkers who had accepted Doctor Handmitten's leadership were at their job of mining and refining iron and other useful metals, when they saw..... living creatures. Creatures who DID NOT match any of the types Handmitten had told them not to kill. One was, to be sure, human-shaped; but the murder machines had not been told to consider winged humanoids as human.

In a moment, shots from thirteen energy weapons converged upon the winged man. Flappos, friend of Mighty Male and She-Wow, was in The Good Place before he realized what had hit him. Aslan would later let Flappos watch a replay of how Dolph Bluntgrin and the other good guys retaliated against the Bazonkers.

With confirmation of no hostiles remaining, Subsoila assumed her burrowing alter-shape and began exploring the pit-mine the Bazonkers had been working. Dolph and Ruthie went on guard with rayguns. Notsobadd Bunny, who had picked up technical knowledge from Nawtyfeller's workers on Forgeworld, used his virtually-indestructible switchblade to pry open the data cores of the defunct robots. Adam Wornsock, at home with both science and magic, soon flew to join them. He had heard of the Bazonkers, and was ready to help find the answers about what Bazonkers were doing on Redundantworld. The involvement of Doctor Handmitten with the genocide machines was assumed, but HOW exactly they would serve him-- against what victims-- was unsure. Even the two Odin-counterparts would not have an immediate solution.

Because Kings Garryowen and Woolywoofin lacked a key piece of the puzzle. The Bazonkers on the contested planet had computed that Handmitten shared their objective of killing senselessly. They had consequently unlocked and revealed to him the whereabouts of much greater numbers of Bazonkers on standby...... at locations from which half of them could reach Hallpasscard, and the other half could reach Jumpstard.

The odds favored the Hallpasscardeans and the Jumpstardeans to survive conflict with Bazonker armies-- but not without suffering losses. And the remaining defenders of Redundantworld would be stretched thinner and burdened worse.

Meanwhile, on Anoxia, Dragon Equivvalentor was keeping in psychic communication with She-Wow on his own world, and with Sorcery Lass on Alwaysurnia. "Lowblow and Hipstera still try to escape from time to time; Deathstink seems to have given up on it, but Lowblow draws confidence from his bizarre ability to become stronger from being hurt. So far, I have thwarted him on this point, by NOT hurting him each time I catch him trying to break free. I'm getting quite an education in variations of naughty language."

One thing said to him by the Queen of Anoxia was: "I believe we need to send at least a bit of reinforcements to where Tunakassrol and Tunafishla are on Redundantworld. I plan to place Lady Surfenbirda in command of this detachment; besides being smart and able to function both on land and underwater, her mutual affection with Tunafishla since Tunafishla turned good will help Tunafishla to keep her moral compass."

 

[Copperfox]

Apart from some of its heroes being on Redundantworld, Earth-Whichever has been overlooked long enough. The Thumpercolts will be getting involved in hunting for the evil sorcerer Blues Trauma, who now serves Chinese Triad crooks. Prominent in the gang lineup is a chief nicknamed Upside-Down Leopard.

Lieutenant-General Timothy "Thumper" Moss had done enough stunts letting himself be seen in public together with a robot copy of Red Chunk, that he no longer worried about people wondering "why they were never seen together." He had given the robot back to Stork Enterprises, to be used in further development of powered armor and exoskeletons. With intelligence coming in about Chinese Triads obtaining an unspecified magical resource, the General gathered his Thumpercolts team: Dirtypool, Alchemistress, Taskmistress, and Useless Agent.

Moss had not forgotten the genius who had enabled him to become a high-grade metahuman. Unlike Bruce Banner in Original Earth comicbooks, Bryce Donner had never considered changing himself into a massive mega-humanoid. Not even after his cousin Jasmine proved successful as the Exquisite She-Hunk. Bryce really was a scholarly type, contented to let his achievements benefit other people while benefiting America. Superheroes were newer to Earth-Whichever than to Urth, Terra, Seedubb and other human worlds. Now, news of alternate worlds was increasing: the most intense news since Trippenwonk had been driven away from this Earth-variant.

Bryce knew it, but he still considered it his best role to equip others for battle.

x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x

At a villa on the Delaware coast in the America of Earth-Whichever, the two female Thumpercolts-- Cadenza "Taskmistress" Mundayne and the younger Nabila "Alchemistress" bint-Faisal were chatting about what more-prestigious heroes were doing.

CADENZA: You know, Kirk Slippage can't do anything I couldn't do better; his off-world wife can't do anything you couldn't do better. And we have Pentagon connections. Why don't we get to fly to another galaxy?"

NABILA: True, our team has plenty to offer. But Doctor Slippage and Zoorama already have experience of being on other planets. There's no shame in being a home guard, especially now that we know Triad gangsters have dug up something magical. But speaking of magic: has the General received any tips from Dreamtime Chieftain?

CADENZA: Latest I know, old Kuparr hasn't received any new reports from the Spirit Kookaburra. But the Vhanis have left India to visit their country's embassy in Angola. I know you've heard of the specialized magician there.

NABILA: Yes, the one who casts spells on machines. I understand he's as good as married to an alien Heart Sapphire.....

x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x

It was night in Angola. It so happened that, some six hours before the conversation between Taskmistress and Alchemistress in Delaware, Kahilu Baloval had in fact been joined in marriage to the naturally one-eyed alien woman Vilkarezdu of the Fifth Blezrip, this wedding conducted by an Angolan Catholic priest. (Just what a Blezrip was, remained untold.) Among the witnesses had been the Hindu metahuman couple Arush "Flying Elephant" Vhani, and his wife Jelisaveta Vhani. Jelisaveta had never bothered assuming an alias, because what she had gained was purely passive: alien micro-sensors painlessly embedded in her face, giving her the ability to detect and analyze unusual energy patterns.

Jelisaveta had been amazed by the intricacy of the energy emitted by the jewel on Vilkarezdu's forehead. Arush, for his part, was more naturally intelligent than was expected from the laboring class of India; having heard about Vilkarezdu's cyclopean face, he took to pondering whether a child sired upon her by Mister Baloval would have two eyes or one.

 

[Copperfox]

As regards Blues Trauma's magical talent: his former use of a teleportation scroll had run out of gas, but in a plotline- advancing windfall, he discovered something similar and longer-lasting.

The Urth-native magic-user Mirror Merchant, at some time in the past, had briefly explored Earth-Whichever (before it had acquired multiple metahumans in time to oppose Trippenwonk). Always given to maintaining a good supply of mirrors for teleportation, Merchant had left one behind when he blinked back home. Suffice it to say that Blues Trauma finds this compact magical device, figures out its use, and informs Upside-Down Leopard of the windfall. Thus do the bad guys in this Triad branch gain enough added capability to be worth superhero attention-- because they also possessed some surviving rayguns formerly carried by Pukedemons. Mobility plus firepower would make these Triad criminals a threat for heroes to reckon with.

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In the previous post, Taskmistress told Alchemistress that the Ostralian shaman had not heard from the Spirit Kookaburra lately. This was true at the time Cadenza said it; but now the magical bird, similar in purpose to the cosmic ravens Ignore-It and Forget-It, related to Kuparr Daku the latest news from the beleaguered Redundantworld. Soldiers from Earth-Whichever, and a few supers, were already there with Doc Slippage. The Thumpercolts ought to stay on their Earth as a home guard, but it should be possible to send other heroes to beef up Earth-Whichever's rescue force on the huge Third Galaxy planet.

When word of this came to Bryce Donner's ears, he decided all right, he had better get in the game after all. He would finally turn himself into a Hulk variant: gray-skinned in his case. He would make sure to keep his mind rational, and his skin would be dull gray to distinguish him from the version based on General Moss. Bryce would not immediately let people know he had taken this step; he would at least once play the robot- copy trick. He would call his new form "The Indelible Grump," though confident of retaining his true personality.

Red Chunk and the Thumpercolts were likely to guess who the Grump really was, but Bryce would not volunteer the information. It wouldn't matter much, since Red Chunk and company were staying on this Earth to keep America safe, while Gray Grump intended to help out on Redundantworld once he could obtain intergalactic transportation to get there.

Note that Bryce Donner's view of his own America differed greatly from the attitude of Original Earth movie actor Mark Ruffalo.

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Stony "Iron Gent" Stork has not been onstage for many chapters by now. It's quite reasonable to assume that, in the interval, he got married to his equivalent of Pepper Potts in the comics and movies. Also in keeping with Marvel canon, the inventor-hero began to suffer from heart disease. His right-hand man Roby "Fighting Machine" Doby took over the management of Stork Industries. Victor Steinenfranck, the European doctor who had changed Walter Welldunn into Dirtypool, joined Stony's cardiac-health team. Spoiler: my version of Tony Stark will survive to a grand old age, but is henceforth removed from onstage hero-action.

Also involved in the corporation, as caring for her husband and their children permitted, was Mrs. Stork. Her biggest single contribution was giving out scholarships to promising science students. One of these up-and-coming students was named Meemeemee Drillgums. Among potential new inventors, she was the cleverest, most gifted, and most deserving of admiration ever --because she said she was.

Scholarship candidates were allowed to explore corporate spaces which were not identified as restricted access, as long as they didn't interrupt work. Mister Doby's first direct conversation with Meemeemee was occasioned by finding her poking through a storage room full of armor-suit parts. And this room was clearly marked as restricted access.

"Miss Drillgums, are you searching for something?"

Meemeemee scowled. "If it's any of your business, I'm here to make sure the components >I< invented are all still here."

This got Meemeemee permanently barred from Stork Industries property, with scholarship denied. But Fighting Machine was unaware that the young narcissist had already stolen assorted equipment for breaking and entering. Persuading a street gang to do the heavy lifting, she stole enough parts to assemble an armored suit in a hideout. She also managed to steal a generate-power-without-explanation mini-reactor, because advance the plotline.