war of the dwarves and elves!

[Zella]

Beware, Elves, how you escalate things. You just might find out that some Balrogs, seeking political asylum, defected to us Dwarves after the death of Sauron....

There weren't any left were there? Most of them had been defeted by the Elves before the Third Age and the one that fought Gandalf was destroyed.

 

[Mozart the Meerkitten]

There weren't any left were there? Most of them had been defeted by the Elves before the Third Age and the one that fought Gandalf was destroyed.

There was another I think in Bar-dur but as I recall those were the only ones.

 

[Copperfox]

Actually, these are a little-known new generation of Balrogs. Just a matter of days before he perished, Sauron succeeded in capturing several people who put too much lighter fluid on their barbecue grills. Telling them, "Join me and you can REALLY play with fire," he turned them into Balrogs. But soon Sauron was toast, and the former backyard cooks needed new sponsorship. These new-model Balrogs don't use whips, they use gigantic hot-dog tongs.

 

[SingingDryad~]

Hot-dog-tong-toting Balrogs....
What'll those Dwarves think of next?

 

[GondorGirl]

Which VeggieTales?

The Lord of the Beans

*passes the time by playing with fire*

 

[Zella]

The Lord of the Beans

*passes the time by playing with fire*

I love that one (even though I've only seen it once).

*Throws water on the Dwarves' hot-dog-tong-toting Balrogs*

 

[Copperfox]

The Dwarves call a halt to the battle, in order to take a steambath break in the steam rising from their tame Balrogs.

 

[Zella]

If they're tame why are they fighting us?

 

[Copperfox]

They're tame to their friends the Dwarves; not so tame to snooty, stuck-up Elves.

 

[Zella]

Well, at least we get to live forever.

 

[Copperfox]

Well, at least we get to live forever.

Not if an angry Balrog gets its hands on you, you don't.

 

[Zella]

Yeah but our spirits live on forever in the halls of Mandos and sometimes we're born again to our children. Nobody knows what happens to the spirits of Dwarves.

 

[Copperfox]

That's an outdated statement. We now know that Narnian Dwarfs with an F are allowed into Aslan's Country...and so are Dwarves with a V. Of course, knowing Aslan is why we're fighting this war for fun, not for blood.

 

[Zella]

That's true, I didn't think about that, I was on Middle Earth Dwarves.
But most of us still get to live forever!

 

[Copperfox]

Well, then, we Dwarves will plan to annoy you so much that you'll WISH to die!

 

[Frodosgurl]

Elves can annoy even better! We have our serious faces and or elvish speach which none of you know! SO

 

[Copperfox]

But you forget, the Dwarves DID learn Elvish back in the days when Moria was constructed, which is why we could prepare an Elvish-language welcome sign on an entrance for Elvish visitors. Of course, that was before you Elves got so stuck-up and full of yourselves.

 

[GondorGirl]

Elves can annoy even better! We have our serious faces and or elvish speach which none of you know! SO

certainly when there are typos

sorry couldn't resist

*makes angry dwarf face* angry dwarf faces are better than serious elf faces!

 

[Mozart the Meerkitten]

*makes these faces at dwarves*

 

[Copperfox]

Several Dwarves now stick their tongues out at the Elves, but then they realize that their whiskers conceal the out-stuck tongues from view.