What are you going to do with me, Amanda? Keep on exchanging innocuous barbs of soft and gentle Glove, I hope! And one other thing on this auspicious occasion: you are going to DANCE with me. Specifically, tap-dancing, which is as G-rated yet exuberant a form of dance as has ever been invented.
I am a self-taught tap dancer. Forget all the mystical twaddle about "the energy flowing from your center;" tap dancing, at least in its fundamentals, can be discussed objectively, in an almost mathematical way. The most basic fact about it is that there must be some foot movements which transfer your body weight from one foot to the other, plus other movements which DON'T shift your weight but only give one more tapping impact. Whichever foot bears the weight at a given instant, the weight will almost always be supported by the ball of the foot, NOT the heel, because it is much harder to shift weight gracefully from heel to heel. Thus most heel impacts on the floor will be non-weight-bearing touches, accounting for much of the audible tapping.
So just imagine that, while we are waiting for my other guests to show up, I coach you carefully--SAVAGELY browbeating you with praise and encouragement all the way, of course; and you bitterly resist my instruction by learning everything perfectly with a radiant smile on your face. Then, when we have our audience (besides Vortex--who, having four legs plus wings, can be forgiven for not being impressed by two-legged performers), you and I take off and strut our stuff like Colin Dunne and Jean Butler, or Michael Flatley and Bernadette Flynn.