Ask a Telmarine!

[Glenburne]

What are Telmarine mental health services like? And do people who say they have seen lions get sent to counseling?

 

[CORIN THUNDERFIST II]

What do Telmarines make of political correctness?

 

[Miss Freckles]

Do Telmarines have any annual celebrations or holidays?

 

[Glenburne]

Are there things which Telmarines will not mention in polite company that normal people (i.e. Narnians) would consider odd? Water, for instance?

 

[CORIN THUNDERFIST II]

Or, perhaps, Lions?

 

[Glenburne]

You turned into a well in the Corrupt a Wish thread. Is this a sign that you hope to one day overcome your hydrophobia?

 

[Sopespian]

God with a capital 'G', yes, but what about with a small 'g', such as the river god?

I don't believe those exist in our world.

What are Telmarine mental health services like? And do people who say they have seen lions get sent to counselling?

All Telmarines are of highest mental acuity. Although sometimes I wonder about Glozelle.

No.

What do Telmarines make of political correctness?

It is an unnecessary evil.

Do Telmarines have any annual celebrations or holidays?

March 2 is Telmar Day, for Telmar is great.

Are there things which Telmarines will not mention in polite company that normal people (i.e. Narnians) would consider odd? Water, for instance?

Yes. Bodies of water are included.

Or, perhaps, Lions?

What are lions?

You turned into a well in the Corrupt a Wish thread. Is this a sign that you hope to one day overcome your hydrophobia?

I don't have Hydrophobia. That's a symptom that people who have rabies develop. You're thinking of Aquaphobia. I don't have that, either. I have Thalassophobia.

And no. Fictionally turning into a well isn't helping my Thalassaphobia at all.

 

[Glenburne]

So the Telmarine fear of water has no connection to a past history of rabies? (And are you sure about Glozelle...?)

 

[CORIN THUNDERFIST II]

What about Miraz? Would he have qualified?

 

[Glenburne]

How do you feel about your ancestors, by the way? The pirate ones? They didn't have thalassaphobia.

 

[CORIN THUNDERFIST II]

Captain Hook was a famous pirate. Was he a Telmarine, or related to them?
How about Blackbeard?

 

[GondorGirl]

Do you think the aforementioned thalassaphobia has anything to do with the fact that they were sailing and then suddenly were in a completely different magical world? I can see how that would be traumatizing.

 

[Sopespian]

So the Telmarine fear of water has no connection to a past history of rabies? (And are you sure about Glozelle...?)

That's correct. Pretty sure.

What about Miraz? Would he have qualified?

Miraz never qualified for anything, lazy bum.

How do you feel about your ancestors, by the way? The pirate ones? They didn't have thalassaphobia.

They were cool. Yes, them. Nope; it got acquired in later generations.

Captain Hook was a famous pirate. Was he a Telmarine, or related to them?
How about Blackbeard?

No. Also, no.

Do you think the aforementioned thalassaphobia has anything to do with the fact that they were sailing and then suddenly were in a completely different magical world? I can see how that would be traumatizing.

It's possible. I definitely wouldn't rule it out.

 

[CORIN THUNDERFIST II]

Were either Jack Sparrow or Hector Barbossa Telmarines, or related to them?

 

[Sopespian]

Were either Jack Sparrow or Hector Barbossa Telmarines, or related to them?

I don't recall either of them having Mediterranean accents, so I'm going to say no.

 

[Glenburne]

Are there any Telmarines that non-Telmarines like? Caspian, and all the others who essentially changed citizenship post-Miraz, don't count.

 

[Sopespian]

Are there any Telmarines that non-Telmarines like? Caspian, and all the others who essentially changed citizenship post-Miraz, don't count.

What are you talking about? People love me.

 

[Glenburne]

Besides you. As in, is there a Telmarine Charles Dickens or something?

 

[Sopespian]

Besides you. As in, is there a Telmarine Charles Dickens or something?

MAFIA XXVI: Traverses through Telmar

Mr. Holmes: It’s a little-known fact, but the original Sherlock Holmes was really a Telmarine. Sir Arthur Conan Doyle, having passed through a magical chasm leading him to Telmar, met Mr. Holmes and his pal, Dr. Watson. Holmes and Watson told Sir Doyle all of their exciting adventures solving mysteries. When Sir Doyle returned to England, he wrote all of Mr. Holmes tales in a book, setting the stories in England. Mr. Holmes gets to find out the job of one person per night, by PMing the Telmarine lord.

Most people are pretty fond of Sherlock Holmes. But seriously, though. Everybody loves me. I'm adorable.

 

[CORIN THUNDERFIST II]

What are you talking about? People love me.

I rather got the impression that Miraz did not love you, nor did most of the Narnians whose country your people pillaged!