Attention-Deficit Roleplaying

On their way to the pizza oven, they were stopped by the Count who had lost his way and needed to find how to get to Sesame Street.

"How does one get to Sesame Street?" The Count asked.

Miracle Max and Wolverine looked at each other, and then pounced on the puppet. There was much fighting, and in the end, Wolverine shredded the Count's fabric, leaving nothing but a puppet-less hand.
 
Mr. Bill cried out ,"Wait, he was one of the good guys!"

But thankfully since Count von Count was a puppet he was easy to repair. However, that did not stop our heroes from tossing the remains of Edward Cullen, and the other sparkly parasite into the pizza oven and setting it on it's highest maximum setting.
 
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Grey Eagle, with his fire-starting power, could have attended to the cremation of Edward Cullen (in this, the second or third instance of Edward getting killed in this roleplay, and good riddance AGAIN); but he was out reconnoitering, in case the undead might have unexpected reinforcements coming.
 
"Oh, yeah," said Iron Man. "There is. I've personally installed a Stark Industries 616 Pizza Oven."


Meanwhile Indiana Jones, The Rockteer, Captain America nad Superman were en route to speak with Grey Eagle. They had just learned disturbing news... the vampires were in league with.... The Nazis!
 
Then Ralph Hinkley -The Greatest American Hero-, showed up with his friend FBI Agent Bill Maxwell. They sat down at a table and Bill started talking about a "scenario" involving "pretty-boy vampires", "Nazis and commies", in league with the "Obamination of the United States". Soon after, Pam Davidson (Ralph's attorney girlfriend) joined them at the table and suggested they file a lawsuit against the publishing companies. Bill's response: "Hahaha! That's a good one, counselor."
Then Joey Scarbury stood up on a table and started singing, "Believe it or Not" the theme from "Greatest American Hero".
 
Grey Eagle performed some stage magic and stand-up comedy, to distract people from any overly-explicit references to CURRENT REAL-WORLD evildoers. After awhile, then, although he was tired of the over-use of "Nazi revival" plotlines, he agreed just this once to pretend that everything was about the Nazis coming back.
 
All of a sudden the bartender ( who was the same one from Star Wars who threw Threepio and R2 out of Mos Eisley Cantina) stood up and said, "Hey, you'll have to take the party elsewhere. There's too many of you. And stop shoving dead vampire carcasses in my pizza ovens!"
 
Everyone started moving out of the building. It was time to go vampire hunting! Joey Scarbury kept on singing as he followed the line of heroes out, "Believe it or Not! We're leaving this place! We never thought we could feel so freeeeeee!"
 
At that moment Thor walked up to them, carrying ten dead vampries over his shoudlers in dear hunter fashion.
"Barkeep, I demand your beast meed, for I have had a good hunt today. Though, I must wodner if I didn't shame myself and my father in killing these fiends .For they were weak and put up no fight. Also, I heard that this was the palce to dispose of them."

Tony told him,"sorry bud, we gotta take the party elsewhere.

TO which Thor said, "Then what I am I suppsoed to do with these vampire carcasses?
 
Sven-El said:
At that moment Thor walked up to them, carrying ten dead vampries over his shoudlers in dear hunter fashion.
"Barkeep, I demand your beast meed, for I have had a good hunt today. Though, I must wodner if I didn't shame myself and my father in killing these fiends .For they were weak and put up no fight. Also, I heard that this was the palce to dispose of them."

Tony told him,"sorry bud, we gotta take the party elsewhere.

TO which Thor said, "Then what I am I suppsoed to do with these vampire carcasses?
Click to expand...


Grey Eagle stepped up and replied, "I can attend to them. I wasn't around for the last batch, but now--" And, levitating the slain vampires to a safe area, he incinerated them.
 
At this point the daughter of Edward and Bella ( whose chronic case of Soap Opera Rapid Aging Syndrom was so severe that she aged from about 8 years old to 28 years old and working on her masters thesis) burst threw the door and declared, "No man can defeat me!"
 
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Grey Eagle captured Reneesme in his telekinetic field, turned her upside down, levitated her fifty feet into the air, and said, "What was that again?"
 
At this point Eowyn sighed, walked up, and said , "Bad choice of words when I'm around. Just ask the Witch king. "

"Oh, yeah," said Reneasme," While my name is cooler than yours, Arwen's or Galadriel's!"

At this Gimli stood up and said ,"What who dares besmirch the name of the Lady Galadriel!"

Every hand in the room pointed upward at Renesmee...
 
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Shocked when Thorin said "I hate elves", Gimli lost all self-control and PUNCHED Thorin! Immediately every dwarf ever mentioned by name in Tolkien's books all began fighting in a bar-room style brawl. None of them intended to kill each other, but they all had great fun beating each other up.
 
This soon involved Trumpkin and Poggin from Narnia. Things got really nasty when the dwarves from Disney's Snow White the Seven Dwarves got involved. Fili and Kili broke a chair over Dopey's back while Bombur sat on Grumpy and Bashful.
 
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Just then, director Peter Jackson happened by. Grey Eagle, not releasing Reneesme, shouted, "Hey, Dwarves! There's the man who forced Thorin to lose to Azog SO lopsidedly!"
 
Then Gandalf turned his attention to Reneesme. With his skills as an istari, and the combined powers of Galadriel and Elrodn they deaged the girl to a more sensible age of three, erased her memory and devampirefied her. Then they endursted her to the care of Faramir and Eowyn and took her to Rohan to raise her as their daughter.

"One down," said Gandalf." Many more to go."
 
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