Attention-Deficit Roleplaying

Sir Tom the Dragon Knight said:
Tarzan had been watching Star Wars, so he thought he'd join in and also managed to beat a few Tusken Raiders before the Tharks had finished mopping them all up.
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Meeting Tarzan after the action, an almost human-looking man from Mos Eisley said to him, "I hear that you specialize in fighting dangerous beasts. Perhaps you'd be interested in killing some of the vaguely dog-like beasts the Tuskens keep. Those are really nasty creatures."

 
Tarzan told the Tharks, "Well, over on Hoth, another planet of this imaginary universe, they have big white apes very similar to the white apes on your version of Mars."
 
Meanwhile some teeny-bopper actors heard that Sir Christopher Lee was 92, still acting and still relevant. So they went to ask him "how are you still so active? Will we be as relevant when we are 92?"
 
Sir Christopher answered them: "One very important thing is that, while you still are young, you should cultivate in yourselves a sense of obligation to something OUTSIDE OF YOURSELVES. You may not have heard this, but when I was young, I was an actual special-forces soldier for the United Kingdom, fighting the Nazis with my own hands in World War Two. Guitars and flowers are all well and good, but somebody still has to PROTECT the guitarists and florists."
 
Overhearing him, Sylvester Stallone immediately tried to find room for a cameo for Christopher Lee in an expendables movie because it is one thing to play an action hero, it's another to be one in real life.
 
That someone was a member of the Kardashian clan who was made that Christopher Lee was stealing their limelight .They tried to shiv him, but the skills he acquired as a WWII veteran, as well as working on LOTR, Star Wars, Bond, and playing Dracula all came back to him. There was nothing left of the Kardashians when he finished except for enough silicon to make computers.
 
Sven-El said:
That someone was a member of the Kardashian clan who was mad that Christopher Lee was stealing their limelight. They tried to shiv him, but the skills he acquired as a WWII veteran, as well as working on LOTR, Star Wars, Bond, and playing Dracula all came back to him. There was nothing left of the Kardashians when he finished except for enough silicon to make computers.
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Sir Christopher saw to it that all computers thus manufactured would be programmed for useful purposes (noting that artistic and cultural activities could count as useful) -- NOT for idiotic shooter games.

 
These computers were to be given to children of struggling families in inner cities to allow them access to educational materials.
 
Magneto from "X-Men" was so touched at this that he volunteered to set up some generator armatures around himself, thus generating electricity out of his own magnetic field, providing free power to those computers during homework hours.
 
However, being an evil bigot who didn't realize how much of an evil bigot he was, Magneto only agreed to provide power for mutant children. Fortunately, his daughter Polaris from the X-Men was around to help human children.
 
Magneto was infuriated at this. But then Mystique sidled up to him, saying, "Magny, baby, isn't it about time you thought about something besides being angry at people? Haven't you ever noticed that I'm desperately in love with you?"

Magneto finally did notice, and love changed him amazingly.
 
(Okay)

In fact, one side effect of Magneto being in love, was that he began to behave like a father to his children, Wanda, Pietro, and Lorna. In fact, they were all so happy that they decided to stop being supervillains.

This made Magneto's Acolytes, who practically worship him, very angry.

(Ooh, drama!)
 
Some really stupid Magneto admirers, mistakenly believing that the automobile term "mag wheels" had some connection with MAG-netism, began looking for cars with mag wheels to vandalize.
 
Unfortunately they picked the wrong car...The Batmobile. There are two things Batman does not like: guns and people trying to mess with his car. The last he dislikes even more as insuramnce premiums are already steep on the Batmobile due to it's speed, style, color, and how many times it has been destroyed. Much to say they were in for a world of pain.
 
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