Really Bad Jokes.

Ok, forgive me if someone already told this one, but I just have to for the sake of...I dunno...I just do.

So there's these 2 muffins sitting in an oven baking, as muffins placed in ovens usually do. The first muffin turns to the second muffin and and says "Boy, it's really getting hot in here."
The second muffin says "Ack! A talking muffin!"

HAHAHAHA...well, my campers liked it...the first time.
 
Alright, I have a bad joke...

Two guys are sitting on a bench. The first guy says "Man, my life is so messed up. I send my son out to get a job, and he comes back married!"

The second guy says, "You think you've got problems. I send my son out to become a chef, and he comes back a politician!"

All of the sudden, there is a voice from heaven (ie God) and he says, "Oy, you think you've got problems. I send my son into the world, and he comes back a different religion!"

Ha Ha...no.
 
There once was a girl named Myrtle, who had a pet turtle! One day myrtle looked at her turtle, and she couldn't see his arms legs or head. It's dead! she wailed, so her family and friends got together a nice funeral for the turtle. There was a nice procesion and lots of flowers but just as they were putting the turtle in the cigar box, it poked out its arms legas and head. Myrtle looked at the turtle and then at the big bunch of people and all the flowers and said, Lets Kill it!!!

ooooooo. That's was terrible I know.
 
So, there's these 2 noodles in a pan boiling, as noodles usually do in pans. One noodle turns to the other and says, "Boy, it's really getting hot in here." The second noodle turns to the first noodle and says, "Ack! A talking noodle!"
 
On a flight to Houston, a blonde took a seat in the first class row of the plane although her seating assignment was third class. An attendant noticing this politely asked her to go to her assigned seat. Determined, she said, "No. I'm blonde, I'm beautiful, and I'm going to Houston." Aggrivated, the attendant fetched the copilot. The copilot more firmly told the blonde to go to her assigned seating, but she remained there, saying, "No. I'm blonde, I'm beautiful, and I'm going to Houston!" The copilot, not being able to get her move, went back to the cockpit, but one the way, another passenger noticed the situation and offered to talk to her, saying he was married to a blonde and knew how to talk to them. He approached the blonde and whispered something in her ear. The blonde looked embarrassed, apologized, and went toward the back of the plane to her assigned seat. The copilot asked what that was about and how he got her to move. "Simple," he said. "I told her that first class wasn't going to Houston."
 
I dispize blonde jokes. Know why? You can probobly guess. anyways. I do like this joke though.

There once was these three girls. A brunette, a red head, and a blonde. Well, they were sneaking around a barn, but then they heard someone coming, so they each proceded to hide somewhere. The Brunette hid behind a cow, the red head a horse, and the Blonde, a sack of potatoes. Well that somone suspected something so he started poking things. First he poked the cow, and the brunette said, "moooo". Then he poked the horse and the red head said, "Neeighh!" and then he poked the sack of potatoes and the blonde said "Potatoes, potatoes."

I think EVERYONE has probobly heard that joke.
 
A plane was about to leave an airport, when two men walked onto the plane. One was carrying a walking stick used for the blind, and another was being ushered by a guard dog. The two men were blind, and they were dressed in pilot and copilot suits. A couple of the passengers started to laugh, thinking it was a cruel joke by the airline. The pilot and copilot went through the pilot's door, and the plane started moving. The passengers were starting to get a bit worried, but they still thought it was a joke. The plane started to move, and the passengers just assumed the men weren't really blind. The plane started to move down the runway. The plane was about to reach the end of the runway, and the plane wasn't taking off! The passengers started to scream, praying for their lives, when the plane lifted off the ground at the last second. The copilot turned to the pilot, and said

"You know, one of these days, the passengers aren't gonna scream, and then we'll be in real trouble."
 
So, there's these 2 popsicles in a freezer freezing as popsicles usually do in freezers. The first popsicle turns to the second popsicle and says, "Boy, it's really getting cold in here." The second popsicle turns to the first one and says, "Ack! A talking popsicle!"
 
So, there are these two beans sitting in a pan frying as beans normally do when one bean says to the other, "Hey, is it getting hot in here?" The second bean turns to the first and says "Dude, you told this stupid joke three times already. It's no longer funny so just nock it off. Geeeeesh!" ;)
 
Smog said:
So, there are these two beans sitting in a pan frying as beans normally do when one bean says to the other, "Hey, is it getting hot in here?" The second bean turns to the first and says "Dude, you told this stupid joke three times already. It's no longer funny so just nock it off. Geeeeesh!" ;)

So, there's these 2 spoons in a sink, being washed as spoons in sinks usually do. The first spoon turns to the second and says, "Boy, it's really getting wet in here!" The second spoon turns to the first one and says, "Ack! A talking spoon!"

Is it funny the forth time?
 
Dernhelm said:
Aghrgharcyarrrrr!

ARGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG!

Guess not...

Ok, you guys have to guess the answer to this riddle. Don't worry, this isn't as lame as is seems at the start.

How do you get an elephant in the fridge?

More to come...
 
You all stink at this. Open the fridge and put him in. Der!

How do you get a giraffe in the fridge?

Please tell me you people have heard this before!
 
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