war of the dwarves and elves!

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Once again, your sissy arrows only serve to comb our beards. Meanwhile, when we had you in our clutches while we were giants, we found out about the detachable braids your sissy Elf-scientists had created by ripping off our whisker technology. So we create detachable walrus mustaches to combat your detachable braids!



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"Every liberal is in reaction against the previous form of liberalism."
-- Archbishop Fulton Sheen ​
 
Copperfox said:
Once again, your sissy arrows only serve to comb our beards. Meanwhile, when we had you in our clutches while we were giants, we found out about the detachable braids your sissy Elf-scientists had created by ripping off our whisker technology. So we create detachable walrus mustaches to combat your detachable braids!

Ah,but our detachable braids start choking your walrus mustaches are soon as you attack!
*mustaches are smothered by braids*:p
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But remember, a braid by its nature is united into what amounts to one rope, while a mustache has two halves. When each braid coils itself around one half of a mustache, the other half simply unties the braid, so that the braid falls apart into separate hairs, unable to do anything further. Serves the sissy braids right, for thinking they could CHOKE something which doesn't need to breathe!
 
*keeps some of her braids* Kittens please go retrive the rest of our braids before they are all rendered completly useless.:rolleyes:

*kittens retrive braids and bring them back*

while the dwarves were pre-occupied though my kittens went and smashed several of their devices. Including their shrink ray. They also stole the dwarves research for their flying beards and moustaches.

*creates flying detachable hairclips* (don't hurt me it was the only thing I could think of :p) they spray perfume and are imune to dwarf walrus moustaches.:p
 
Have you heard the saying, "Fool me once, shame on you, fool me twice, shame on me"? Your kittens don't get to steal our technology twice! We were ready for this! All the plans, files and prototypes your kittens took this time were dummies, telling you nothing about our latest developments. Not only that, but they were saturated with short-lived nanobots. These nanobots all self-destruct, leaving no trace....AFTER they perform their function of tying each kitten's tail tightly to another kitten's tail, and tying the whiskers on one side of each kitten's face to the whiskers on the other side.
 
Mozart the Meerkitten said:
*creates flying detachable hairclips* (don't hurt me it was the only thing I could think of :p) they spray perfume and are imune to dwarf walrus moustaches.:p
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*baby Elf bursts out laughing so hard that baby Elf can't do anything for five minutes, until baby Elf notices the kittens, feels sorry for them, and unties them* Animal rights activists chase down the Dwarves, bringing the police to charge them with malicious cruelty to animals.
 
The Dwarves dispose of this frivolous legal threat even more quickly than the sissy Elves chased off the "wetland" lawyers. We point out that the obnoxious kittens would not have gotten their tails tied together if they hadn't repeatedly trespassed in our caves. And since they disturbed the bats when they did so, we counter-charge the kittens with upsetting OUR fragile ecosystem. So the police arrest the animal activists instead.
 
Copperfox said:
The Dwarves dispose of this frivolous legal threat even more quickly than the sissy Elves chased off the "wetland" lawyers. We point out that the obnoxious kittens would not have gotten their tails tied together if they hadn't repeatedly trespassed in our caves. And since they disturbed the bats when they did so, we counter-charge the kittens with upsetting OUR fragile ecosystem. So the police arrest the animal activists instead.
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I didn't follow that.:p

Ok next time we steal something kittens we're using the Mashal Stone.:p:D
 
Feel free to TRY! Our caves are lined with Anti-Mashal-Stone Stones. So anything you claim to achieve with a Mashal Stone will simply be contradicted!


~ ~ Dwarves sing their latest battle song, to the tune of the U.S. Air Force anthem:

Off we go into the deep dark tunnels,
Guided by our miner's lamps.
Sissy Elves drop as if into funnels,
As we dig under their camps!
Axes chop lembas we take in bundles;
Eating it, we start to burp.
We live with beards, and fill Elves with fears--
Nothing can stop the Dwarves who dig dirt!
 
anti-Mashal Stone stones? HAHAHA!!! You make me laugh. You don't even know what the Mashal Stone is! OOOH! I just thought of something! There is also the pross stones!:D

It is impossible to repel the Mashal Stone btw, so I wouldn't suggest trying with your petty dwarvish designs.:p
 
The Dwarves accidentally poison their own meat, thereby rendering themselves unable to talk (and therefore unable to either contradict the elves or to testify in court against the animal rights activists). The judge cites the Dwarves for contempt of court and has them all thrown into a maximum security prison without any digging equipment. *baby Elf claps*
 
Glenburne said:
The Dwarves accidentally poison their own meat, thereby rendering themselves unable to talk (and therefore unable to either contradict the elves or to testify in court against the animal rights activists). The judge cites the Dwarves for contempt of court and has them all thrown into a maximum security prison without any digging equipment. *baby Elf claps*
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Sorry. No. That is TOO direct a claim to control OUR actions. It did not happen. Period.
 
Tirian541 said:
*Flys in helicopter over Mozart and cats* *shoots extra-large rubberbands at them* *then pours a bucket of water on them*:D
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*shields herself*
Kittens: *do to Tirian what the alley cats did to Edgar in the Aristocats* :p (that is they threw a bucket over his head and held him in place with a horse harness or whatever it was, and then they threw him in a crate and shipped him off to Timback Two :p)

Kittens: *hide in my coat*
 
*baby Elf accidentally dumps all the Dwarves' tools into the Crack of Doom*
 
~ ~ Dwarves merely yawn at these pathetic efforts by the sissy Elves; they gave no rationale for being able to GET AT Tirian in his helicopter, and besides, our nanotechnology gives us automatic immunity to undetectable-by-any-means poisons.
 
After getting bucket off head: *runs to get new toy from workshop* *brings out huge elf-food magnetic* *shares new food with dwarf camp*

But Glenburne, you forgot to throw in my new rust and water proof axe!
*jumps on bike and rides toward Glenburne*
 
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